George of the Jungle Page #4

- No!

George!

Whew! Okay, kids, let's settle down

and review the important information.

Lyle is a big doofus.

Poor George was really shot...

but can't die because,

let's face it, he's the hero.

So, the naturally concerned

and preternaturally wealthy

Ursula Stanhope...

whisked George off on a private jet

bound for the country of his birth...

where he would get the finest

medical treatment available.

I'm gonna get you the finest

medical treatment available.

As for those pesky, pernicious

and putrid poachers, Max and Thor...

they awaited their fate

in the Bujumbura jail.

You two, out.

- Acquitted?

- No, deported.

Meanwhile, Kwame and his men faced

the next-to-impossible task...

of picking out George's assailant

from a line-up of the usual suspects.

Too short. Too sweaty.

Wait a second! That's the guy.

That's the guy who shot him.

- I never forget a face.

- Me?

No, Max. Forget about it. I do not want

to listen to any more of your ideas.

You'll like this one. We're gonna steal

Georgie-boy's talking ape.

- You mean, back up the mountain?

- Thor, that ape is our ticket...

out of poaching

and into show business.

- No.

- Think about it. We got a talking ape.

What do Siegfried and Roy have?

- Sequins?

- Exactly.

Get ready for room service,

mate, and girls.

We're gettin' our ape

and going to Vegas.

By next weekend,

we'll be headlining at the Tropicana.

- Nobody is gonna stop us.

- Right.

George of the Jungle

must be halfway to Frisco by now.

Ah, but the plotting poachers

were only half correct...

for at that very moment, our handsome

hero was all the way to San Francisco.

- Yes, Mother, I'm safe.

- You're sure you didn't

catch dengue fever?

No, Mother, I did not

catch dengue fever.

- Well, how's your temperature?

- Normal.

- Colour of your tongue?

- Pink.

- What about your hmm-hmm?

- Regular.

Now, Lyle.

How is my darling future son-in-law?

Lyle is...

He's happy to be home, Mom.

Could you hold on one second?

George, please don't call any animals

into the car, okay? Thanks.

Mom? You there?

Mom, hold on. I'm losing you again.

George. George. No.

Are you paying any attention?

This is important.

No. I know it's important. Geo-Geo...

George. George. Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot.

This faster than riding big,

great, peanut-loving poochie Shep.

Love you, Mom. Gotta go.

Bye. Watch out for that...

Ooh!

So, what do you

think of my jungle?

This very high tree house.

Good place to call friends from.

Sound carry.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

The neighbours.

- Give it a rest!

- We're ten storeys up, George.

I don't think the animals

can make it up here.

Oh, sure.

George know that.

George know that.

You must be tired. I'll, um...

make the couch up for you

to sleep in the living room.

Oh, no. George sleep here

in tree house.

Okay. Good night.

Sleep sweet, Ursula.

Sleep sweet, George.

Ooh.

Well, Ursula's fiance

is in prison...

and there's a jungle man

sleeping on her balcony.

- She could use a best friend right now.

- Hi.

- Hi.

- I got here as fast as I could.

- Where is he?

- He's under the waterf...

He's in the shower.

Not any more.

- George.

- Oh. Bad waterfall.

First water get hot, then George slip

on this strange, yellow rock. Oh!

- Hi. George of Jungle.

- Charmed, I'm sure.

George.

Um, take this big book.

Whoop! Cover the booty,

get into decent clothes.

- Sorry, Betsy.

- Bye.

- No problem.

- Okay.

- I see why they made him

king of the jungle.

Betsy, I am

in trouble here, okay?

How am I gonna tell my parents

that my fiance's in an African jail...

and that I brought home

a jungle man?

You are totally stuck

on George, huh?

No, I am not!

- Can I have him then?

- Okay, let's think. Think, think, think.

Think, think, think, think,

think, think, think, think.

What am I gonna do about tomorrow?

Tomorrow is your engagement party,

and unless they give day passes...

out of Bujumbura Jail,

Lyle is not likely to attend.

So tell 'em the truth and don't

worry about it and take George.

- He can back up your story. Right?

- Yeah. All right.

So I'll tell my dad

first thing in the morning.

Make it second thing. First thing, I

suggest you buy jungle man some clothes.

Nice butt flap.

Being of a conservative mind

regarding gender roles...

Ursula Stanhope

wasted no time...

in taking George of the Jungle

to a fine haberdasher.

- And this is Neiman Marcus.

- Whoo! They have big, shiny cave.

Hello. Would you like

to sample our new fragrance?

Thank you.

Later, in the men's department, after

discovering his long-lost brothers...

the jungle king was pleased to find

he looked pretty good in Armani.

Pretty darn good.

Watch out, man!

Why everyone run around crazy,

like antelope in mating season?

They're just trying to make a living.

It's... different kind

of jungle here, George.

It's survival of the fittest.

Dog eat dog.

- "Dog eat dog"...Dog eat dog here?

- No, that's not what I meant.

George never bring Shep here.

Uh-uh. Never.

Every story gets to have a really big

coincidence, and here's ours.

Who should see them walking down

the street but Ursula's meddling mother?

Uh, yes, uh, Lyle Van de Groot,

please.

- I'm sorry. He's not back from Africa.

- He's not?

No. I'm sorry.

Meanwhile, back on Ape Mountain...

George's friends were going positively

ga-ga from missing the jungle king.

No!

Oh, look at this.

It's ruined. Ruined!

Shep, come here at once.

Come on!

How many times do I have to tell you?

My violin bow is not a chew toy!

Bad dog!

And you! Out of my sight,

you feathered fool.

No! Not on the tree house!

I'll smack you...

Ursula, it's Mother.

Pick up the phone...

and tell me who that man was

I saw you strolling with today.

And where is Lyle?

We must discuss the engagement party.

I know you're there, Ursula.

Pick up the phone and tell me

why you have been avoiding me.

Pick up the phone!

Well, I think that

was an overreaction.

Just make sure you stay here

while I'm at work...

and you can watch TV

and eat and relax.

And I'll be back as soon as I can.

Just stay here.

"Stay here"? George is king

of the jungle. No four walls built

by modern man can contain him.

Not true. George have every intention

of doing exactly what Ursula say.

- Really? Is that so?

- For a while.

And at that very moment,

Betsy and Ursula were on their way to

break the news about Lyle to her father.

- Good luck, kiddo.

- Surprise!

Ursula, welcome home,

sweetheart...

and happy engagement day.

Chock Full O' Nuts

The heavenly coffee

- The coffee that brings you together.

- When you're in love

Now George understand. George get

coffee, then Ursula want George.

Java-java-java-java,

java-java-java-java,

java-java-java-java.

So the low has moved offshore.

High pressure's built a ridge in.

The weather

is absolutely gorgeous.

- If you're not outside, you oughta be!

- Who, me?

- I mean you.

- Oh.

Okay!

And so, jazzed on java...

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