Gerry

Hey, Gerry, the path.

God. It is so...

Yeah.

It is really nice, man.

Fresh air.

- You ready?

- Nope.

- Hi, guys.

- Hey.

Hiking moms on the trail?

It's just gonna be.

It's alI tourists up there.

Well, how far is the thing?

We're haifway there.

Let's go this way, man.

Everything's gonna lead

to the same place.

- Just loop around?

- Yeah.

Do our own fresh route?

I can't believe that, like,

f***ing fanny packs

and sing-alongs

the whole way to the thing.

F*** it, dude.

F*** this.

- F*** the thing?

- F*** the thing.

Power on to the thing!

- F*** the thing.

- F*** the thing!

It's just gonna be

a f***in' thing at the end.

- F*** the thing!

- F*** the thing.

Let's go back.

F*** the thing.

Hey, is this the way we...

Yeah. That's it.

Right?

Yeah.

Hold on.

Is this the way we were going?

- Yeah. This is it.

- Yeah.

So...

She thought it was a "Y"?

- Who? The contestant?

- Yeah.

Yep.

She had every letter

except for the "L".

She had "B-A-R-R-E,"

blank, "I-N-G

down the road. "

"B-A-R-R-E," blank,

"I-N-G down the road. "

And alI she had was "L"

for "barreling down the road. "

And they were like, "Do you

want to solve the puzzle?"

Because you have to when -

When you have one letter left,

you have to solve.

You're not allowed -

Because you're only spinning

to drive up your earnings.

Right.

So it's like cheating if there's

only one letter left.

And so they told her

to solve it, and she said...

"Barreying down the road?"

And there's this

really uncomfortable pause,

and Sajak was like, "No.

Kenny?"

And the next dude did it.

But for zero dollars

because he couldn't spin.

He was just like,

"Barreling down the road. "

I hate you.

- Not really, though, right?

- Not really.

It's just really hot on my front

and really cold on my back.

There's a man

perched on the ledge...

10 feet in front of us.

Don't look.

I see you, man.

Do you hear that?

There's a lot of dinosaurs

near here.

I conquered Thebes.

When?

Two weeks ago.

How'd you do it?

Well, I got...

I did more than that, actually.

I said to Gerry...

"I ruled this land

for 97 years, and... "

"... and I'd like it. "

I had alI the sanctuaries built,

and then I...

This hot lava leaked out

of a volcano

and haif destroyed my sanctuary

to Demeter, I guess it was.

And...

But I didn't have the marble to

rebuild, like, the sculptures

and that to fix the sanctuary.

But I already had

alI these docks

to, like, Calydon

and Argos and...

I had everything.

Everything.

I was trading

with, like, 12 cities

and...

I had a really good army.

But the river had just flooded.

And it flooded out,

like, four of my docks,

and I couldn't import the marble

to rebuild the sanctuary.

Demeter got pissed off, and

she made my fields infertile.

And then...

So I couldn't grow the grass.

I couldn't grow the wheat

to feed the horses.

And there was no...

I couldn't -

And there was nowhere

for the sheep to graze.

And some of my people were

growing hungry and restless,

and then...

And I couldn't trade

because the rivers had flooded.

And so, Knossos,

one of my vassals,

got really upset with me

and turned against me.

And they... attacked me.

And because I couldn't

train any sheep

'cause I didn't have the wheat.

I didn't have...

I didn't have a, um, a...

You couldn't train sheep?

I couldn't train the horses

because I didn't have wheat.

And so when they attacked me,

they just dogged me.

And I actually went to send

my army out to defend the city,

and you can only send them out

if you have 12 trained horses,

and I had 11.

So I was one horse shy...

of almost saving my city.

So then you didn't really...

Oh, I had just conquered Thebes,

and then that happened.

All right.

You go to that one,

and I'II go to this one.

All right.

Hey.

You see anything?

Big hills.

Yeah.

Uh, re-split up.

All right.

All right, see the ravine?

Yeah.

That's the spot.

So you go to the next one,

I'II go to the next one.

if you don't find anything,

we meet back right there.

if you find something,

f*** the spot, I'II find you.

Higher hilltop, meet at spot.

Or f*** the spot, wait there.

- Yeah.

- Roger.

Gerry!

Gerry!

Gerry!

Gerry! Gerry!

Hey!

Hey.

What are you doing?

What?

You're supposed to go on

a high-hilI scout-about.

You're on a rock in a canyon.

I did.

Yeah, did you see anything?

No, did you?

No.

Well, what are

you doing on the rock?

Looking for you.

Why didn't you

just go to the spot?

I did.

You weren't there.

I've been there.

I was just sitting there.

Dude, that's not the spot.

The spot is, like,

a haif of a mile that way.

I was at the spot.

I was waiting for you forever.

I was yelling your name.

And I just came walking up here,

and I saw the rock.

I crow's-nested up here

to scout-about the ravine

'cause I thought maybe you

gerried the rendezvous.

Sure enough, I mean,

that's not the spot.

All right, my fault.

Well, if you had assumed that,

then you should've gone

to the top of my mountain

because the whole plan was

if one guy finds something,

then you go to his mountain.

No, I know the plan,

but I saw you coming down

when I was on the way down,

and when you never showed up,

I thought maybe you'd succumbed.

I almost did succumb,

but then I turbaned up,

and I feeI a lot better.

Come on, dude, let's go.

I can't.

Why not?

F***ing marooned.

Come on.

You're not rock-marooned.

Just climb down.

But I am rock-marooned.

I can't climb down.

I'm gonna have to jump.

Hold on.

How do you get up to that part?

Scramble.

Jesus.

How the f*** did

you get up here?

Such a bear.

I think you gotta jump.

I can't jump,

I'II break my ankle.

You'II have to barreI out

of here and get help,

and I'II just be sitting there.

All right, I'II jump.

No, no, no, no.

You're gonna

twist an ankle or something,

and then we're f***ed.

Well...

Is it really crumbly there?

Like, the ledge?

Yeah.

I mean, I could try and...

Why don't you

make me a dirt mattress?

No, Gerry.

Come on, dude, I crow's-nested

alI the way up here

to scout-about the ravine 'cause

you gerried the rendezvous.

if I hadn't we'd be split.

We'd stilI be re-split.

Dude, just jump.

You'II be alI right.

I won't be alI right, Gerry.

Well, I could try

and break your fall.

- Jump on your head?

- Like the circus, dude.

No, not on my head,

with my arms.

Didn't you ever go

to Barnum's, dude?

They have a fat guy.

He's got huge arms,

and he catches people

from, like, 50 feet.

All right, you ready?

No, I'm gonna break your arms.

Just make me a dirt mattress.

- Where do you want it?

- Right there.

All right.

Well, I gotta hauI the dirt.

Well, get hauling.

I can hauI it from over here.

- Shirt basket?

- Shirt basket.

Yeah, it's crumbly.

- Is it soft?

- Yeah, soft.

It's like -

It feels hard, but it's...

You know, it's like dust.

Yeah.

You're gonna take forever,

Gerry.

I'II get alI this stuff

up to it also.

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