Get Out Alive

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1

( Horn honking )

Honey, off the phone, let's go.

Hon, the limo is here... finally.

What the hell is he doing?

He's just sitting there.

I don't know.

First he's late and

now he's being a jerk.

You've gotta be kidding me.

Just grab the bags and let's get going.

This prick can forget about a tip.

Just hurry up.

Domestic terminal.

And step on it.

By the way, thanks for

the help with the bags.

Jerk.

Never again are we hiring this company.

This is ridiculous.

You know who recommended them?

Who?

Ron.

Don't ever listen to Ron!

Oh my God, Ron.

This is classic Ron.

It's the same Ron who said

he'd get me on the golf course

for half price.

( Laughs )

Ron.

You know what happened that day?

I paid for four people

to go at full price.

Well, if you close this business deal,

we can buy our own golf course.

You know who won't be playing

on our course?

Ron.

Shouldn't we have taken this turn-off?

Hey! What the hell are you doing?

You're going the wrong way.

Turn around.

What's your problem?

Turn around.

If we miss this flight,

I'm going to have you fired, jerk!

This is unacceptable.

Unacceptable.

Who does he think he is?

Where are we?

What's up with this guy?

I don't know,

it looks like we're in some

kind of industrial park.

Will, do something.

You've pushed this too far!

I'm calling the cops.

Jackie, something weird is going on.

Oh, my God! They have guns!!!

Will, they have guns!!!

Are you crazy?!!!

Please, take what you want,

just don't hurt us!

If this is a kidnapping,

I can get you money!

We don't want your money.

What is it?

You're worth more dead than alive.

( Gun shots )

So after hacking into the satellite,

I was able to download loads of data

and a clear pattern emerged.

The eyes in the sky

are fixated on coordinates

with very distinctive

radioactive signatures,

and why is that?

Aliens!

Mrs. Forrester...

Call me Lucy.

Did you hear what I just said?

Aliens could be watching right now.

All my theories are true.

I hacked into the satellites...

Court order, no hacking,

no computer access.

We live in the 21st century,

and you're my lawyer.

That's why I hired you,

to stop the government

conspiracy against me.

And as your lawyer,

it's my job to keep you out of jail!

No computers?

That's like Lord of the Rings

with no Gandalf.

Ok, relax.

Take a deep breath.

I am here for you.

That is why I'm seeing you

on short notice at my house.

I promise, I will get

that order rescinded

as soon as I get back.

How do I know you're not just

saying this to keep me calm,

but in fact you're planning

on moving to Europe

and working with the world bank and...

There's no conspiracy here,

and I am not moving to Europe.

I am here for you.

That is why I took your case

pro-bono because

I believe that you have a voice,

so you've just got to trust me.

Ok, I will see you next week.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Ok.

Ok.

Hey, you ready to go?

Just about.

You ok?

Mmmhmm.

You know, we don't have to go

if you don't want to go.

I know.

I just think it'd be good

for us to get away,

you know, with some new friends.

Sure.

Great.

I'll be outside.

See ya.

"Welcome to Second Chance

Retreat, where couples

go to grow love."

Wow, really?

They need a new catch phrase.

It's not about the catch phrase, Greg.

It's about the experience.

That doesn't sound any better.

It's like any other vacation,

only you get to work

on your relationship.

You do realize you said

"vacation" and "work"

in the same sentence?

Trust us.

A couple's retreat can work wonders.

It's the secret to our happiness.

We go every year.

It's like a tune-up for our marriage.

( Laughs )

Leave it to men to compare

marriage to cars.

So exactly how backwoods is this place?

Well, my friends, we get

to arrive in style.

What does that even mean?

It's a surprise.

I'm not a fan of surprises.

Come on, Lucy.

Any chance we'll be stopping soon?

We're getting close.

We've been driving for, like,

three hours.

How far is this place?

We're not so far away

from the departure point.

Departure point?

What does that mean?

Relax.

You're about to find out.

( Sirens )

Uh-oh, looks like we've got company.

What seems to be the problem?

You know you were speeding?

No, I'm sorry, I did not.

I'll need to see your license

and registration.

The rest of you folks,

can I see your ID as well?

Is that really necessary?

I'm afraid so, ma'am.

We've had a rash of drug runners

come through the state.

I'm just checking.

We have nothing to hide.

Alright, you folks hang tight.

I'm just gonna run these

through the computer.

Nothing like small town hospitality.

Were you even speeding?

No.

They're probably just

razzing out-of-towners.

It all checks out.

Where y'all headed?

Second Chance Retreat.

Right.

Have a nice flight.

Thank you.

Wait, flight?

What is he talking about?

Like I said earlier,

we're arriving in style.

Something tells me this is not

going to be an ordinary trip.

Wow, you weren't kidding when

you said traveling in style.

( helicopter whirring )

Thanks.

Thank you!

Thank you!

Ha, ha, ha!!!!

Well, welcome to Second Chance Retreat.

So, does this get the

Forrester's seal of approval?

It's so much nicer than I imagined.

Big time.

It's pretty impressive.

Come on, Lucy.

Let's go check it out.

We'll wait for the second

chopper with the bags.

Wow, it's so serene.

It's so beautiful.

Very romantic.

I was gonna say relaxing.

Welcome to Second Chance Retreat.

Good afternoon.

Place your hand on the outline, please.

Oh, I'm sorry.

What's this for?

The security ID links

to your unique prints

and lets you into your room.

Basically, it recognizes

your bio-signature.

I had the same reaction

last time I was here.

Relax, it's harmless.

Really?

Mmmhmm.

( Computer )

Bio-scan successful.

And now I'll take a picture.

Once you check in,

the doctor will be around

to do a medical.

Wait, a medical?

I'm fine, thank you.

It's just for insurance purposes.

They're gonna take a blood sample,

check your heartbeat,

basically just checking to see

if you're alive and breathing.

I'll show you to your rooms.

Well, perfect.

I just need to call the office

and make sure there aren't

any fires to put out.

You're out of luck.

Sorry, no phone calls.

Retreat policy.

We have a cell blocker

to prevent any calls.

Wait, seriously?

We are officially off the grid.

It's to help mend the relationship.

Great.

Trust me, you'll be thanking me

in a week.

If you say so.

The security, is that really necessary?

Unfortunately, some of the wives

attack their husbands during therapy.

It makes for a dangerous environment.

( Laughs )

I'm kidding!

I had you!

No, it's for the insurance company.

They insisted on it, I don't know why.

I'll stick with the angry wife scenario.

Speaking of angry wives,

let's go find them

before they spend all your money.

Oh, man. This place is awesome.

The security?

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