Gold Diggers of 1933 Page #3

from out of town.

- Texas cattle.

- Yeah, Texas cattle.

How can they sell cattle?

Who eats meat anymore?

- All I can say is...

- How much do you need?

- $50,000.

- There isn't $50,000 in the world.

Not to put a show on with, anyway.

All right then, who needs $50,000?

Make it $40,000, $25,000.

If I wanted to chisel,

and I know how to chisel...

I could do it for $15,000, but...

I'll advance you $15,000.

Say, what does he use? I'll smoke it, too.

Quit joking, will you?

It isn't smart to make gags

when girls are starving.

Brad, this is too serious a matter

to all of us.

Honey, I mean it. I'll be glad to do it.

Where can you get $15,000?

He means real money,

not streetcar transfers.

Remember, one condition:

Polly is featured.

Anything you say.

Nope. I can't give you a check

for certain reasons.

I'll give you cash tomorrow.

Is that all right?

- You fell for it, Barney.

- He did. He fell for it.

That's what's commonly known as a gag.

It's not a gag. I mean it.

Tomorrow I'll be in your office at 10:30.

You have my word for it.

I'm going to go work on that number

a little, so I'll see you later.

Goodbye, honey.

- Brad.

- Yes?

- Brad, this is cruel.

- What, honey?

- To kid about a thing like this.

- I'm not kidding. I'll give him the money.

He'll have it in his office

at 10:
30 tomorrow morning.

- Where are you going to get $15,000?

- Well, honey, I'll tell you...

See this ring? I just give it a little twist,

make a wish, presto.

- Brad.

- Trust me, will you, honey?

- And I'm not joking.

- That's just the trouble.

- I do trust you.

- Oh, honey.

- What?

- No, I won't say it yet.

I have an idea, and I want to get

to the piano before I lose it.

See you later.

He meant it. Really, he did.

I'd stake my life on it.

Faith, hope, and charity.

You have faith, Barney hopes,

and we all need charity.

Wait a minute.

Listen.

He's got it. Just what I want.

Don't you hear that wailing? Wailing.

Men marching, marching,

marching in the rain.

Jobs.

Gee, don't it get you?

- Well?

- There's no answer...

at Mr. Roberts' apartment.

Now Trixie can say, "I told you so,"

but I won't. It hurts too much.

Come in.

Gigolo Eddie always shows up

at the wrong time.

Hello, Barney. Heard you got your mitts

on some dough to open a show.

Thought you might want to celebrate.

Fresh off the boat.

Well, you heard wrong. Pull up a coffin

and lie down with the rest of us.

Business is so tough that nobody

even wants to owe me anymore.

- You can go.

- But you hired me for the day.

I thought I was going to need a secretary.

Well, you'll pay me for the day,

or I'll make a complaint to the agency.

I wish there was somebody

I could complain to.

- Who are you?

- We're the Zipky Kentucky Hillbillies.

- Who?

- The Kentucky Hillbillies.

- Singing.

- Dancing.

- Music.

- Wisecracks.

- Do you know Your Old Kentucky Home?

- You said it.

Scram right back there.

Your old mammy's waiting for you.

We get it.

I better lock this joint before the acrobats

and midgets start flocking in.

- Good morning. You're early.

- I'm sorry I kept you all waiting.

- Yeah?

- I got a new idea for a number...

and I lost all track of time.

Got a piano? I'll play it for you.

Hey, listen, kid,

I'm the comedian around here.

We've had enough of your gags.

They're not funny.

Please stop it, Brad.

There's a limit to everything.

I'm going to lock this office.

Get out of here, all of you.

- Don't you want the money?

- Don't kid me.

There you are. $15,000, cash.

Brad, I always knew you were on the level.

Rehearsals start at 9:00 in the morning.

Fresh off the boat.

Pettin'in the park

Bad boy!

Pettin'in the park

Bad girl!

First you pet a little

Let up a little

And then you get a little kiss

Pettin' on the sly

Oh, my!

Act a little shy

Aw, why?

Struggle just a little

Then hug a little

And cuddle up and whisper this

Come on, I've been waiting long

Wait a minute. Hold it.

Hold it, girls. Gordon, listen, you've got

to put some life into that song.

- Yeah?

- You got to sing it with some pep...

and some feeling.

You got the whole thing wrong. Listen.

Play me the first chorus, will you?

Here's the way it goes. Now come on.

Pettin'in the park

Bad boy!

Pettin'in the park

Bad girl!

First you pet a little

Let up a little

Then you get a little kiss

Pettin' on the sly

Oh, my!

Act a little shy

Aw, why?

Struggle just a little

Then hug a little

Cuddle up and whisper this

Come on

I've been waiting long

Why don't we get started?

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

What am I doing that's so wrong?

Well, listen, you do this

right in the middle part.

Come on, I've been waiting

That's not the melody. Here it is.

Come on

I've been waiting long

Why don't we get started?

All right. All right.

Now, let me tell you something.

I've been a juvenile for 18 years...

and you're going to tell me

how to sing a song?

Come on, fellows, let me down, will you?

I want to get a glass of water.

Come on, girls and boys,

show me that dance chorus.

Come on, snap into it. Hit it now.

Come on, let's go. Give it to me now.

Listen, Brad, why don't you do

this juvenile part yourself?

You've got it over Gordon like a tent.

Reconsider. Give your songs a break.

Barney, I told you, I can't do it.

You say you can't,

but you don't tell me why.

You've got a voice. You got personality.

You can do it, but you won't. Why?

Barney, will you let it go at that

once and for all? No public appearances.

- Hi, sweets.

- Hello.

Listen, honey, you've got quite a yen

for that boy, haven't you?

I like him, of course.

There's something awful funny about him,

something very mysterious.

Listen, did he ever tell you

where he got that $15,000?

- No.

- And why he has to live on $25 a week...

when he can go out and come back

with that much money?

Now, look.

"Toronto bank clerk took $20,000...

- "from bank and disappeared."

- I can read.

That's quite a coincidence, I should say.

- What's a coincidence?

- And look.

"New York police asked to check up

Broadway nightspots."

And here's the description of him:

"5'9", dark hair"...

That could describe anybody.

It couldn't describe me,

and it couldn't describe you...

and it does describe him.

He is about 5'9"...

and he has got dark hair,

and where did he get that cash?

Well, don't be ridiculous, Trixie.

You're letting your imagination

run away with you.

Listen, honey, I don't want to see

you fall in love with a guy...

who's going to get you

into a lot of trouble.

I know, but I'm sure.

What are you sure?

What do you actually know about him?

Does he ever talk about himself?

Does he ever mention his family?

You remember that he wouldn't give

Barney a check, it had to be cash?

And he won't go out there

and play Gordon's part. Why?

Because he's afraid that newspaper...

Now, listen, don't talk,

and don't come back here. You promise?

I said I wouldn't, didn't I? So long.

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