Good Burger Page #2

Just let me,

let me fix it, please.

You shouldn't

have been driving.

No, let me fix it.

Let me fix it!

All right.

All right?

Yeah, all right.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'll let you

fix the car.

So, uh, how much you think

it's going to cost to fix?

That's all right.

Maybe your parents

will help you out.

I'll just give them a call...

Ooh, oh, um, wait.

I'll get the money.

You can't get the money.

I know you got a summer,

you just want to be free.

We'll just call...

No, wait, wait, wait, wait.

I will... I'll...

I'll...

I'll... I'll...

I'll...

I'll get a summer job.

Bun, patty, topping, sauce, assemble.

Bun, patty, topping, sauce,

assemble.

Bun, patty, topping,

sauce, assemble.

Come here, little bun.

Oh, beef patty.

Okay, yeah.

Ooh, that's nasty.

All right.

Yo, my man,

can I borrow some lettuce?

Can I borrow some...

You.

Who?

You! Look at this mess.

I, I can explain.

See, I was trying to put

the big old beef patty...

oh, on the bottom half

of the bun, you know,

before the tomato

gets all slippery

with the... ooh,

that's slippery.

Oh, I'm sorry.

And then, you know,

the pickle bits was

making me do the wrong...

because they're,

they're flexible,

they're not crunchy.

And...

Yo, man, back me up on this.

Oh, again with

the whistle.

Shut up. Just be quiet.

It'd be a lot more quiet

if you stopped

blowing the whistle.

Watch your mouth,

you pestiferous

little maggot.

Now, I'm familiar

with the term \"maggot\"

but... pestiferous?

Burn this into the front row

of your brain, chuckles.

If there's one thing

Kurt cannot stand

it is an incompetent,

bumbling, sloppy,

fast food employee.

Yum.

Yeah.

Ed!

What are you doing inside

the milk shake machine?

Oh, trying to fix it.

Did you turn on the switch?

No.

Ah.

Whoo!

Whoa...

Yeah...

Strawberry Jacuzzi.

Oh! Oy-yoi-yoi-yoi-yoi-yoi...

Oh-ho, oy-yoi!

People, I'm fully stoked

about being in charge

of every single one of you.

Within two years,

Mondo Burger's going to be

the biggest burger chain

on this planet.

Oh, yeah.

First we got to beat out

our big competition across

the street, Good Burger.

From now on,

your life is

Mondo Burger.

You can forget

about your friends,

you can forget

about your family,

because Kurt... is now both

your mother and your father.

Kurt must look

awfully strange naked.

Who said that?

Who talked while Kurt

was talking?

It was him.

He uttered something.

Why, I should've known.

Uh, I'm sorry I uttered.

You think you're funny,

don't you, bro?

You know what?

At Mondo Burger,

there are no comedians.

You mess with Kurt and

you go into the grinder.

Okay, now this grinder

of yours,

is it a real grinder

or is it some kind of

a metaphor?

That's it, you're gone!

Adios, TKO, historical.

Wait, wait, wait.

I-I won't be funny

no more. See?

Security!

You ain't got to bring

the man down here.

Wait, one second.

Kurt, come on, please,

I need this job.

Take out the trash.

\"Trash\"?

Oh, now, look'ee here, p...

Get this loser

out of my face!

\"Loser\"?

Oh, now, you about to push me

a little too far.

You want a piece

of me?

Yeah, extra crispy, please.

Oh, see, you

lucky you brought

your friends down here.

Hey, man, is this really

necessary?

Kurt, please!

I need this job!

Please, I need this job. Please.

Excuse me.

Look, I ordered one Good Burger

with nothing on it.

That's what I gave you.

No, you gave me

a bun.

Just a bun.

Look, there's no meat in here.

But you said you

wanted nothing on it.

Yes, well, I expected

a meat patty!

Dude, a meat patty is something.

You said nothing.

Fizz, is a meat patty

something,

or nothing?

Uh... something?

I win!

All right, that rips it.

I am reporting your name

to the manager!

The manager already

knows my name.

Oh, I'll see you in hell!

Okay. See you there.

Such a nice guy;

I don't know why

he had to throw the

bread everywhere.

I mean, jeez.

One more Good Shake.

Good, good,

keep them coming.

Um, dude, don't you think

you've had enough?

Hey...

Hey, you look familiar.

Don't I know you from somewhere?

Ever been to Australia?

No.

Me neither.

I could've sworn I seen

you someplace before.

Hey, I know.

Maybe I'm someone famous.

You know,

like a baseball player,

or a pretty nurse. Huh.

What? Man, what in the world

are you talking about?

Okay, okay, I give up.

Who am I?

I don't know who you are,

or where I know you from,

or why you think

you're an attractive nurse.

But I am sure I don't

want to know you

any longer.

Now please, go away.

I've had a very bad day.

What's wrong?

Were you bitten by a sheep?

What?!

Did you lose

your trousers?

No!

Look, you're an unusually

bad guesser,

so I'm going to go ahead

and tell you why I'm upset.

to fix some jerk's car,

to fix my mother's car

and I just got fired.

Man.

I can't believe Kurt fired me

from Mondo Burger.

I mean, he yelled at me,

then he insulted me.

He made fun of me.

Boy, you must really suck.

See, right about now,

I'd slap you

in your head,

but I'm not quite sure

that your brain would understand

the concept of pain.

Hey!

Want to see my belly button?

Well, it was

very unusual

to meet you... Ed.

I'm going to go now

and try to beg someone

for a summer

job, man. Bye.

Wait. You could work

here at Good Burger.

Here?

Yeah. Hey, Mr. Baily,

this guy needs a job.

Could he have one?

No!

See ya.

Wait, wait, wait.

Come on, Mr. Baily.

He really needs one.

He can do fries.

Otis does fries.

Yeah,

but look at him.

How much longer

could he possibly live?

Yeah.

Well...

Have you ever worked in

fast food before, uh...

Uh, Dexter. Dexter Reed.

And yes, I have worked

in fast food.

Yeah? How long?

Nearly two days.

Oh, well...

Do you know how to drive

a motor vehicle?

Yes.

I'm an excellent driver.

Any accidents on your record?

Not to your knowledge.

All right, Dexter.

I'm going to

give you a shot.

You're on deliveries.

And you may have

to pitch in

and do some

counter work.

Okay.

Cool! I'll teach him

everything I know!

Oh... God help me.

I won't let you down.

Hey, Fizz.

This is Dexter.

Fizz works drive-thru.

Well, hi-de-ho, Dex.

Uh, hi-de-ho, Fi.

\"Fi\"?

Wow, nobody's ever abbreviated

my name before.

I love that.

Huh!

Hey, and that's Otis. Huh.

and still works

in fast food. Huh.

I should've died years ago.

Tough break.

And there's Deedee.

She's a

veterinarian.

Vegetarian.

Oh.

That means she

doesn't eat fur.

I won't wear fur.

I don't eat meat.

Hey, uh, Ed,

wh-what is that?

Oh, that's

just Spatch.

Let me show you.

Come here. Huh.

Hey, Spatch.

Uh, Spatch isn't much of

a \"people person.\" Huh.

Aah!

Mmm.

Mmm.

Mmm.

You want to rinse that off?

Uh...

Well, hello.

My name is Dexter.

I'm your new coworker.

Monique.

Well, that's a nice outfit

you got on there.

And those stripes

really bring out

the color of your eyes.

Yes.

You can imagine how

embarrassed I was

when I came to work

and saw everyone

wearing the same thing.

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