Good Hair Page #10

And I don't want to fool around

and rub my fingers through it,

and say, ''Wait, wait, wait, wait.''

That ''wait, don't do that.''

I don't want to ruin the rhythm,

so I've been

waiting for a period

where I ask her,

what are the rules and regulations

of messing with your hair

and making you feel sexy?

But I haven't got there yet.

I'm still waiting

for that moment.

Hold up there.

Hold a minute.

I was making love

to this woman one time, right?

And I was, you know,

gettin' it from the back.

You know what I mean, right?

You was getting it

from the back?

Doggy-style!

And she told me--

She told me

to pull her hair.

And when I pulled her hair...

it came off.

I said, ''Uh-oh.

''l think it looks like a man.''

- Oh, no!

- But it wasn't.

- We ain't talkin' about that.

- But it wasn't.

Baldheaded as could be.

So you cannot touch

a black woman's hair.

You can't. Wrong.

You can't do it.

Understandably so.

If you paid $150 for a haircut,

you wouldn't want people

touchin' your head.

You can't touch the weave?

When was the last time

you touched a woman's hair?

1986, before the market crash.

The market crashed

in '87, October 19th.

The last time I was allowed

to touch a broad's hair was...

'86, somewhere in there.

White women love you

to touch their hair.

Pull it, yank it.

Twirlin' 'em around by it.

Jump off the ceiling with it.

Jump off the cliff

and hang-glide with it.

ls this why black men--

some black men favor white women?

- Yes.

- No!

I don't favor them, though.

But some black men--

not you--

some black men do favor--

- White women.

- Yes.

Do you feel a level

of intimacy with a white woman

that you cannot feel

with a black woman?

- Yes, I do!

- I'm not going to say that.

l'll speak up myself!

Hell, yeah!

Because there's no rules.

I can do things with a white broad

that I can't do with a black, yes!

Not true. You got to find

the right black woman.

It's no secret that some

of the best conversations

happen in barbershops

and hair salons.

While the big hair business,

like manufacturing and distribution

isn't in black hands,

these barbershops

and hair salons

employ thousands of black men

and women all over the country,

feed black babies,

and send thousands

of black kids to college.

And they continue to act

as social centers

in their communities.

As the barber,

what is your role in the community?

I'm the doctor.

I'm the psychiatrist.

Whatever it is you need,

if I can help you,

l'll try to help you.

It's still an industry

where somebody

can go into business,

make a lot of money,

not have a college education,

be able to do something wonderful

for themselves

and for their families

and maybe even

their communities.

But there's this expression,

this creative expression

of black people

that I think is shown

when we see

all of these amazing

individual hairstyles.

But what's the definition

of style?

Right there, that's style.

See that?

It's like a sculpture.

Hairdressers are superstars.

Barbers are superstars

that are bigger

than doctors, lawyers.

What are your hair dreams?

I want to own

a whole chain of salons.

- Like lHOPs.

- Right.

What's your hair dream?

What's my hair dream?

To own my own salon

and be a platform artist.

Platform artist?

At the Bronner Brothers Show?

Right. Like

at the Bronner Brothers Show.

So here we are in Atlanta.

After months of rehearsals

in the heat,

fish tanks, Botox clinics,

churches, and day spas,

we finally made it to the

Bronner Brothers hair competition,

all in the pursuit of good hair.

Now let's break it down.

We have Jason,

the self-proclaimed

Rosa Parks of good hair,

the favorite to win

even though

no one has seen him practice.

I told everybody

to be here around 3:00.

It's 3:
05. It is what it is.

We've got Tanya and Kevin,

who have some

beautiful models...

Oh, God!

And the heavenly Father

in their corner.

Victory, Lord,

in the name of Jesus

and the Father,

let Your will be done.

And then there's Freddie,

the old pro with the tragic history

of elaborate themes gone wrong.

Are they connected,

they set up okay?

And then there's Derek,

a guy who's

all about the hair.

Have you seen the boots?

Wow! That is some boot.

All of them as representative

of the black hair industry

as anything the Bronner Brothers

put on their shelves.

Yes, folks,

this is the alpha and omega,

where it all begins

and some of it ends,

where the weave monster sleeps

and the world of curl leaks.

It's the Bronner Brothers

Hair Battle Royale.

Now let's get ready

to do some really good hair.

Hair is a woman's glory.

And that you share

that glory with your family.

Okay, before we start,

let's meet our judges.

First up, the beauty surgeon,

Dr. Dave Ray,

internationally known

weaveologist, Sammy Jones,

hot comb expert

Britannica Stewart,

and, of course,

former champion,

the legendary

Patrick Antonio Bradley.

Welcome to

the Hair Battle Royale.

Here are the basic rules.

There are four categories

that each contestant

will be judged on:

originality, creativity,

hairstyles,

and audience participation.

There's a mandatory three-cut.

Three heads of hair

must be combed and styled.

They have fifteen minutes

to complete a look--

a fantasy look

or an avant-garde look.

And finally, they must present

a central theme on stage with music.

Tanya Crumel

was born in New York

and raised

in Birmingham, Alabama.

Tanya has been doing hair

for twelve years

under the instruction

of Kevin Kirk.

She gives total thanks

to the Lord every single day.

Ladies and gentlemen, give

Tanya a great big round of applause.

Can you feel the flows?

Tanya came to hit hard!

Don't hurt her.

She don't want

no split decision.

She wants a knockout.

Tanya Crumel.

How'd you feel?

I feel good!

ls there anything

you would change?

Just when we were all certain

that Tanya couldn't be topped,

Jason's models arrived...

with 700 carats of diamonds.

Even our own camera crew

was taken by surprise.

Would this be

the deciding factor

in the 60th Annual Bronner Brothers

Hair Battle Royale?

Let's see.

I was having

the most amazing dream.

Oh, well,

it's time to go to work!

Time to get that work done.

Exercise.

Getting in shape.

Now we know

why Jason didn't rehearse.

No one needs to choreograph

hot women with no clothes on.

If you like what you see,

let me hear some noise

out there.

Jason Griggers.

Will it be a knockout?

You're the best, Papa.

Thank you.

We'll see who's best, Mama.

With such a hard act to follow,

I could see that Freddie

was cracking down on her team

and internalizing the pressure.

Make sure when I cut you or curl,

you work the judges.

Work the judges.

Smile.

Seductive. Smile.

There's no question that Freddie

is a brilliant mind

in the hair world,

but after the failure

of Broke Front Mountain,

her success will depend

on her ability

to translate her concept

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