Goosebumps

"Madison, Delaware. " Wow.

Mom, are you positive there

weren't any other places

looking for

vice principals?

Like where?

Guantanamo Bay?

Ooh, too hot.

North Korea?

No.

They didn't call me back.

Detroit?

This is it.

Come on, come on.

Look. A yard.

You'd never get this

in New York.

You don't have to keep

selling me on this place.

I'm staying because I love you.

Aw, I love you too.

And I looked into it.

Legally, I can't live

on my own until I'm 18.

Look at this kitchen.

It's bigger

than our apartment.

We don't cook.

Well, look at all

this counter space

to put the takeout on.

Whew.

Do you hear that?

No, I don't hear

anything.

Exactly.

Live from New York,

it's my sister Gale!

With special guest,

my nephew Zach.

Get in here with a hug!

Hey. Oh.

Oh, it's an SNL reference.

Oh, yeah.

You lived in New York.

Okay, yeah.

Oh, my goodness!

Look at you!

You're not

in any color.

Hey.

We should change that.

Oh, my God.

It's good to see you.

Wow, you too.

Okay. Let me take him in.

Oh, my gosh. He gets more

handsome every time I see him.

So good-looking.

Thank you, Aunt Lorraine.

He's just a beautiful boy.

Thank God, because you were such

an ugly baby.

There it is.

Oh, Lorraine.

What? It's fine.

He's handsome now.

It's not like

he's gonna go ugly,

handsome and then

back to ugly.

No. The danger's past.

Oh, I almost forgot.

I got a present for you,

because I'm a cool aunt.

This is from my new

signature men's line.

Ooh.

Check it out.

Awesome.

It's limited edition,

so you're not gonna see

a lot of men

wearing that hat.

Yeah, no, I can't imagine

anyone would be wearing it.

It's so limited edition.

Try it on.

Make sure it fits.

Try it on right now? Okay.

Yeah, take her for a spin.

Vroom, vroom, vroom.

Aww!

Oh, yes. Look at that.

I mean, come on. That is it.

Okay.

Um, I'm gonna go unload some

boxes now, and see you around.

Oh, honey. Leave the hat on.

I don't want you to burn.

Mm. And you look good with it

on.

Thank you. Cool.

Smooth.

So you're the new neighbor?

Yeah. Nice to meet you.

How long was the drive

from New York?

No. I can just tell

by the pretty hat

that you have.

Oh, no. This... No.

This is... This is actually

a gift from my aunt.

It's also

a gift for me

and everyone who gets

to see you wearing it.

I'm Zach, by the way.

I'm Hannah.

Hannah.

I gotta go.

Good talk.

Hi. Hey, we're just moving in.

Just... Just me and my mom.

This hat was a gift.

You see that fence?

Do you see the fence?

Uh, yes.

Stay on your side of it.

You stay away from my daughter,

you stay away from me...

and we won't have

a problem.

Well, just met our neighbor.

He's a big teddy bear.

Oh, Mr. Shivers?

Yeah. He moved to town

a few years ago.

Very mysterious.

Very sexy.

I love his scent.

It's like mint and BO.

It works.

Yeah. Not my type.

I remember that day.

Oh.

You okay, sweetheart?

Yeah. Yeah, sorry. Um...

I'm gonna go get a head start

decorating my room.

Knock it off

my bucket list.

How's he doing?

Oh, it's been hard.

He's putting up a wall.

Hopefully, a change of scenery

will help.

How are you doing?

Hopefully, a change of scenery

will help.

- All right, Zach.

- Let's see what you got.

With the fastball.

Two's a curve.

Gotta get up.

You gotta give me the sign.

There you go. Oh!

That's...

Oh, see?

Dad's not perfect.

No.

Dad can get one drop.

All right.

Read the signs.

It's all just to block.

Don't wanna jump up.

That's how the fastballs

get by.

All right. Get ready.

Go fast now. Okay?

Honey? You okay?

Um, yeah. Just found

some old baby pictures.

I really did look like

baby Gollum.

Yeah, yeah.

That's always the case, right?

- Hey, Becca.

- Oh, hey.

Yay. New friends,

new friends, new friends.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What do you think you're doing?

I'm going to work.

Gonna do some educating.

Some administrating.

Cool. Mom, I'm the new kid,

which presents

its own set of obstacles.

Not sure walking in with

the vice principal is the play.

Just give me a 60-second

head start

so I at least have a chance.

Deal. You promise

you'll give it a shot?

You know I can't

promise you that.

I promise. All right?

And this door-locking thing...

Come on, you're better

than that.

Sixty seconds start now,

60, 59, 58, 57, 56, 55, 54...

All right. Let's find our seats,

ladies and gentlemen.

Find our seats quickly.

Let's find our seats.

Mm-hm.

Okay. Let's settle down.

Um...

Okay. Uh, sorry.

Excuse me. Let me just...

Okay, cool. Okay.

So you're the new kid.

Oh, yeah.

Cool, cool.

Oh. Hi, Taylor.

Hi, Chump.

She just call you "Chump"?

Yes, indeed, she did.

My real name is Champ,

you know.

But she's never

talked to me before,

so we're making progress.

Three. two, one.

Settle down.

Good morning.

I am so happy

to introduce you

to our new vice principal,

Miss Cooper.

And I hope that you show her

the same respect

that you show me.

Who did that? Who did that?

Miss Cooper.

Hi, everyone.

I know I speak

for the entire administration

when I say that we are so

excited for Friday's fall dance.

We can't stop

twerking about it.

Oh, no, she didn't.

She's worse

than the last one.

That's my mom.

Oh, well, the last one

was fantastic.

I... I'm kidding. I don't even

know what twerking is.

But I hear it's very popular...

So you taking anyone

to the dance?

No. Yeah.

I was thinking

about flying solo too.

Hey, we should go

together.

Together?

Oh, not like "together"

together.

Dance together or anything.

Although that could work.

You know, we get the crowd

into it, you know?

And then go split off

with different girls.

And as a final reminder,

just be safe and have fun.

Take this.

Shoot me a text or tweet me.

It has all my contact info.

There's my home address,

and that's my locker number.

- You know where to find me.

- Anyone.

Thank you.

Anyone caught dancing

with their butt facing

their partner,

you will be sent home

immediately.

Immediately.

Hello?

Is someone there?

Did I scare you?

Pfft, no.

Really? Because you jumped

like 10 feet high, so...

You know,

I jump a lot.

It's how I stay

in such great shape.

That's good. I, um...

Yeah, I didn't see you

at school today.

Aw, what, you were

looking for me?

No, no. I just...

I just observed...

No, I'm homeschooled.

Oh, by your dad?

He seems...

nice.

And intense.

And a little tense.

Don't take it personally.

He doesn't really like anyone.

Yeah. So, um...

So is there anything,

like, fun to do around here

aside from scaring

your neighbors?

Okay. There is one thing

that I like to do.

Yeah?

Come with me.

Uh...

Hey, where are we going?

Don't worry. It'll be fun.

Are you sure you know

where you're going?

Yes. Come on.

This way.

Are you taking me somewhere

to kill me? I'm just curious.

I'm playing it by ear.

Hannah?

Yes, Zach, follow the stranger

into the woods.

Come on, scaredy-cat.

We're almost there.

Rate this script:3.6 / 12 votes