Grave Page #2

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She said the interns

sent her ward to ward,

saying they couldn't jab her

due to the fat on her arms.

They said to lose weight

and come back.

Can you imagine?

Nonsense.

I'd had no trouble finding a vein.

Why didn't she report it?

Why? Don't know.

To not bother anyone, I guess.

She kind of stood out.

She probably wanted to be average.

How do you see yourself?

Average.

Find yourself a quiet corner.

Wait it out.

The year always starts out rough.

Eyes to the floor for an elder, rookie!

You wearing that?

You didn't hear today?

Hear what?

The dress code is night club.

Go change.

Girls wear something hot.

Not t-shirts with sequins.

This is all I have.

-Is that a no?

-I'd have to look.

OK. Uniform then.

Can I help you?

Come in. Hurry up.

Here you have the septate uterus,

characterized by its long horns

and gradual narrowing

toward the fallopian tubes.

Too small.

No way you're having that.

If you'd spoken up,

I wouldn't have had to eat it.

Let it go!

It was that or you were a reject.

It's your life!

I shouldn't have helped.

You didn't!

I'm being nice.

You'll stretch them with your big feet.

Come here!

I'm not your slave!

Your handwriting is awful.

What?

Do you write on the washer?

Hands off!

I just fixed a couple things.

Small errors, mostly.

Take what you need and scram.

-Move.

-Can I try it on?

Quick.

It's not me.

OK, get out.

-Like this?

-Yeah.

You piss me off.

See you.

F*** this!

Could you help me with...

Don't stop. So good.

-That's pork.

-So?

Grab some ketchup.

What's in your pocket?

Sorry?

Your lab coat. There.

Show me.

Problem solved.

I need to see to ring it up.

Stealing a burger's f***ed up,

even for me. You need cash?

Did anyone see?

Nah.

Own it. Why that?

Don't know.

I'm starving.

It'll be awesome.

It's stupid.

It's a first, we need to celebrate.

-It's on me.

-Great.

What's your sister's problem?

-What problem?

-Let's sit over there.

I don't know,

she's not exactly friendly.

What do you know?

You barely talk to her.

Neither have you, since you arrived.

I can't if you watch.

Say that you kill a guy's hard-on for life.

It's so bullshit to sell booze at rest stops.

Check the bigwigs.

Big rigs, you mean.

Wig's different.

Big wigs are like VIPs or something.

OK. Even with an hour's sleep,

you're still drunk.

Do you think they swap blood

or inject water, like cyclists?

Ask him yourself.

Where you kids off to?

Just having some schwarma.

Then back to campus.

You're at the vet school?

I came down there once with my pig,

he had the flu.

Flu's bad for pigs.

But he's better now.

-You have a pig in your truck?

-Yeah.

We all do.

To swap our boozer blood.

Pigs are almost like humans.

Have you learned that yet?

Genetically, or something.

Well kiddos,

enjoy your meal.

Little lady's hungry.

Don't they feed you down there?

School's good. You're lucky.

You're up?

For breakfast.

Putting on a barbecue?

What do you eat?

Cereal.

Cereal's up there.

I'm just getting milk, OK?

So you cheated.

No.

You admit your friend did.

No.

Miss, I don't have a soft spot

for top students,

unlike all my colleagues,

I feel more sympathy

for your friend than you.

School is tough for him.

He has to fight to stay.

But you,

the wonder child,

you ride in and depress my students.

Some would sooner drop out

than compare themselves to you.

You aren't needed here.

Worse, you scare away excellent doctors.

As you can guess,

I'd rather see your ranking drop

than your friend's.

It was him.

Two fingers will make it come up faster.

Alex!

Hey!

Alex!

Can we talk?

Can't hear you!

We have to talk.

Afterwards!

One time I made out with a one-armed guy.

No way.

Yeah.

It took me two hours to notice.

You know, he draped a blazer

over his shoulder.

I thought,

OK, country club, must have money.

But no,

he just had one arm.

Alex?

Hmm?

Do you think I'm weird?

What? No! Why?

You know you're the favorite.

I'm the weirdo in the family.

Always have been.

What are you doing?

What the f***?

Hips pushed out, see.

And go!

No hands.

How do you do that?

Go on, let's see how far you shoot.

Push hard to get a strong

stream and it works.

I'll go all over myself.

Deep breath...

F***!

I'm pissing on myself!

Normal squat! Normal squat!

I'm still peeing.

Damn!

So gross.

Let's go, it's raining.

Can I sleep over? I don't feel well.

You never feel well, ever.

What? What's wrong?

Stay still.

Better?

Looks the same to me.

At your age,

I already gave myself Brazilians.

What's that?

It's scorching.

Will it hurt a lot?

Beauty is pain.

I'm amazing.

No, I can't.

And leave it like that?

It's uneven.

No, this is torture.

Great, now it's worse.

Let me do the other side at least.

Tell me when you're...

Ow!

No! No!

Come on.

We all do it.

Sh*t.

What? Tell me.

-Odd.

-It's stuck?

-I don't know.

-What's Plan B?

This is weird. Wait.

Get away!

No, no!

-You'll circumcise me!

-We have to.

You're shaking.

It's my p*ssy!

What?

What? What is it?

Alex?

Hey! Hey!

My sister cut her finger.

With scissors.

Cutting something,

who cares!

15 minutes?

Ice? OK, I know.

OK.

-Anyone seen you for the prosthesis?

-What?

-Didn't they sew it back on?

-Nope.

Quicky ate my finger.

The doctor will be by soon.

What about her rehab?

When is it?

No nerve damage, no rehab.

There's no point.

You're leaving her like this?

Really?

She can't eat!

-I'm not disabled.

-Yes, you are!

-You'd like that!

-Don't say that.

Sh*t, leave her alone!

Don't talk to your mother that way.

What's wrong?

I'm going to piss.

Me too.

What the hell? Ow.

Apologize to your mother.

I'm not going back in there.

Do you smoke?

Yeah.

Who has Quicky?

He'll be put down, if not already.

Why? He didn't attack her.

That's cruel!

They have to. An animal that has tasted

human flesh isn't safe.

If he likes it, he'll bite again.

Can't he just take a pill?

Medicine's not an exact science.

You'll see.

Don't have two girls, honey.

It's too hard.

Mom and Dad still here?

No.

-Where are you going?

-We. We need to talk.

Here's good.

You wanted to talk?

What about?

-You asked.

-Something to say?

No, you brought me out here.

So?

I've nothing to say.

Stop mind f***ing me then!

You're like Mom!

You sound like Mom.

If we're here for deer,

I'll kill you.

You're so aggressive.

No, I'm not.

Anger management issues!

-I'm not angry!

-Stay here.

Alex!

Alex?

Are you ok?

What's wrong with you?

Nice, yell at me now.

Sh*t.

Don't! What are you doing?

Stop!

Why are you opening the door?

He won't make it.

Spit it out!

I said, spit!

F***! Are you kidding?

I did this for you, idiot!

You need to learn, right?

What did I miss?

Do me up.

Done?

It's the gloves.

-Take them off.

-Remove the sheet.

We're starting.

Geez. What a pain.

You may begin.

You have an hour.

Sorry for your sis.

No sh*t.

I thought you hated her.

It's still f***ed.

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