Great Balls of Fire! Page #5

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at ten. One girl got wed at nine.

- Married at ten?

- Wed at nine?

- How could you?

- I love her.

But she's only a baby.

Hello, Jerry!

Yesterday, Britons

were shocked to discover

that visiting American rock-and-roll

star Mr Jerry Lee Lewis

was married to a 15-year-old girl.

- Looky there! My baby's famous.

- Well, brace yourself, England.

The child bride in question

is 13 years of age,

and furthermore, she's his cousin.

Second cousin twice removed.

You're on every front page in England.

"Child bride is so young. "

I begged you to keep your big mouth shut.

A few pictures of Myra ain't no big deal.

Jerry, this is a big deal.

I mean, will you listen to this guy?

Let's show Mr Lewis what we think of him

and his baby-snatching ways.

Hell, Mr Phillips, we've got

nothin' to be ashamed of.

The moment you're waiting for,

that fabulous rock-and-roll sensation

from the US of A, Jerry Lee Lewis.

Hello, England. How are y'all doin'?

Y'all don't have to just sit there quiet,

you know. This is a rock-and-roll session.

Y'all can let your hair down.

It'll be all right.

It's awful quiet out there.

I hope y'all aren't as dead

as you sound. I'm alive.

- Sissy!

- Queer!

- Put a lid on it.

- Jerry!

- Cradle robber!

- Baby snatcher!

- Jerry, just play.

- I got married before God.

- Oh, get out of it!

- Get on your bike!

And what's between me and Myra

is between us and God.

And everybody else can just

mind their own business.

- Go back to America!

- Get off!

Get lost!

- How was the concert?

- Great.

Did all those English girls

try to rip your clothes off?

"Police to act in case of child bride. "

"Home Office to investigate. "

Good morning.

- Investigate what?

- They call you a bigamist.

They found out you weren't divorced from

your second wife when you married Myra.

You mean we ain't married?

I never was married to my second wife

in the first place.

I already told you

I didn't need to get a divorce.

Yeah. Um, take a look down there.

We're under siege.

They don't want us here.

- Hello.

- May we see your passports?

Uh, yes. Yeah.

Right over here. Just a second.

- Why don't they just go away?

- They're just curious.

They wanna see the new king.

Don't you understand?

They're angry with you because of me.

Don't let that bother you, baby doll.

You're just going to have

to get used to being my queen.

What do you mean? But...

You gotta give the boy a chance now.

The promoters have cancelled the tour.

The government is tryin' to deport you.

We're washed up here, kids.

We're gettin' out.

Oh, Mama. I wanna go home.

Well, what if I don't wanna go?

Well, why would you wanna stay?

I promised Myra

I'd buy her a weddin' ring.

Well, what do I need a ring for

if we ain't even married?

- Put him in jail!

- Where's Jerry, then?

- They're coming out!

- Oi, mate! Where's Jerry?

It's him!

It's Jerry Lee and Myra!

Come on!

My God!

Did I do this? This is all my fault.

I've ruined your career.

You never should have married me.

Everything was fine until me.

Myra? Baby doll?

You're my wife and I love you,

and I'll marry you a hundred times

to prove it if I have to.

- What do you think of your "king" now?

- You're right.

- Elvis Presley is the true king.

- What was that?

He said Mr Presley is

the true king of rock and roll.

Y'all would have lost the war

without us. You just think about that.

Do you think your expulsion from England

is a repudiation of rock and roll?

They cancelled Jerry Lee's tour because

of our marriage, not cos of his music.

We've been beat up pretty bad

because of this publicity,

but Myra and I love each other,

and we mean to keep it that way.

Jerry, looking ahead, don't you think your

popularity will be diminished at home?

Back home they take a different view

of this sort of a thing.

I expect a great reception

when I get back there.

My fans'll understand.

Mr Lewis, do you have

any final words for England?

Yeah.

England can kiss my ass.

They had a double-ring ceremony -

a wedding ring and a teething ring.

You've heard of sack dresses?

Myra wears sack diapers.

She can't go to see her husband's show -

her bedtime is 8.30.

Myra.

Mr Phillips! What's this all about?

Uh...

Jerry, we were thinkin'

that maybe it would be a good idea

if we took out a full-page ad...

- In Billboard.

- In Billboard.

Uh, sort of a...

An apology.

It might get your phone

to start ringin' again.

Who are you people?

Who are you to walk into my house

and tell me to apologise?

You're makin' more off me

than you ever made off Elvis.

- Jerry Lee, I don't think...

- What, are you in on this too? Huh?

I see that you are.

You all want Jerry Lee

just to get down on his knees

so you can go on gettin'

your little piece of him?

Dogs. You're all a bunch

of snappin' dogs at my heel.

You see this hand?

It makes $5,000 a night.

You see this one? It does too.

$10,000 a night I've made.

Man, I am Jerry Lee Lewis!

I am the goddamn king!

I have a God-given talent!

I shine like gold when I play that piano.

And you want me

to bend my knee?

And what the hell I got to apologise for?

I married the girl I love.

I married her twice.

And I sang and I played my guts out!

I shine like gold.

Don't you tell me to apologise.

Your telephone hasn't been ringing, Jerry.

If you sign this, it may well start.

- I quit.

- Jay.

I quit.

Jerry, why do you do it? Don't!

Will you tell me who the hell is there?!

Come here. Come here.

- Don't you like it?

- Stop!

Ow!

Do you believe I'm sorry?

I am.

My hand to God.

Well... you know, you can't

hit me no more, Jerry.

I just said I was sorry, didn't I?

- Yeah, but that ain't what I mean.

- I know what you mean.

You won't let me forget this, will you?

- No, Jerry, that ain't it at all.

- Oh, yes, it is.

What, you think you're the only one

that gets hit around here?

- You don't think I get hit?

- Please listen to me.

You don't think there ain't a day goes by

that I don't get smacked by some thieving

promoter or chicken-livered disc jockey,

- or lyin' reporter?

- I've got somethin' to tell you!

- This is the thanks I get?

- Jerry, I'm having a baby!

I'm having a baby!

I want to tell you a story.

A story about... two cousins.

Closer than brothers,

who came upon two roads that diverged.

Now, one took the dirt path.

The less-travelled way.

Serving the Lord for the reward

that waits in heaven.

The other started down the wide street,

paved with gold,

hypnotising millions of disciples

in the sin that is the devil's music.

Rock and roll is like a painted woman.

And he could not resist her charms.

Along the way he married and divorced.

Married and divorced again!

Married a third time...

to his 13-year-old cousin!

The whole world was appalled...

because he had sinned against the Lord.

Nor walked in his laws!

Nor in his statutes, nor in his testimonies.

Therefore is this land

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