Harry and the Hendersons Page #2

I didn't kill the poor little things.

Grandma didn't kill them!

Some ranchers raised them

and killed them.

And they only did that because

they knew somebody would buy them.

GEORGE:
Come on, quick,

everybody back into the house!

All right, everybody out!

(GRUNTING)

GEORGE:
Uh-Oh.

Keep an eye on him!

"Keep an eye on him," George?

Lock the door!

Yeah.

George, he's coming back!

Stall him!

I can't! How?

I don't know!

Show him the pasta maker.

George!

Not yet!

George!

He really wants to come in now.

George!

Company!

(PHONE RINGING)

Downtown. Sergeant Mancini.

Sergeant, my name is George Henderson.

I'm at 437 Manning Drive.

I wanna report a...

Something in my house.

What kind of something,

Mr. Henderson?

Some... A big... Something.

My family's in terrible danger.

In danger?

Mr. Henderson, do you have

someone in your house?

A burglar, a prowler?

No, don't think

I'm crazy, Sergeant,

but it's Bigfoot.

Of course, yes.

They can be a nuisance,

I'll tell you what,

Mr. Henderson.

It kind of happens

all the time around here.

Now, we found these Bigfeet

are pretty reasonable fellows.

Hey!

Look, I hit a Bigfoot with my car.

I thought it was dead.

I was gonna call in the morning,

but it must have been hungry

'cause I found it in the kitchen!

You hit a Bigfoot with your car...

No! Yes.

in your kitchen.

Look, I'm under

a lot of stress here,

I mean, it wasn't dead anymore. It must

have just walked into the kitchen.

It was eating

out of our refrigerator.

I thought it was gonna eat me, but it

ate my daughter's corsage instead.

And then our Passiflora coriacea

and then it ate our goldfish.

And where is it now, Mr. Henderson?

It's in the bathroom.

Of course, how stupid of me.

Hey, look, just say I believe you

have a Bigfoot in your house.

First we cordon off

your neighborhood.

Second, we evacuate your neighbors,

and third, we send a whole

sh*t-load of cops in there

to deal with the thing. I mean, fully

armed and ready, Mr. Henderson.

So unless you wanna

be responsible

for wrongfully turning your

neighborhood into a war zone

I suggest you drop this

whole thing right now.

A war zone?

Very well, then.

No, no, no Bigfoot here,

Sergeant. I was just joking.

Sorry, it's just a prank.

I'm not even George Henderson. You

must have reached the wrong number.

We're on our own.

(PHONE RINGING)

No, no, Sergeant, no Bigfoot here.

Irene.

Fine. Wonderful time.

What? No, wait!

It's Irene!

She's bringing the dog back.

I couldn't stop her!

I'll meet her halfway.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

IRENE:
Nance!

It's no use hiding!

I know you're up!

Just take Little Bob

and get rid of her!

Easy for you to say. This is Irene.

Oh, my God!

Look, we can't

let her see this thing.

No offense.

The basement.

You'll love it. It's like

a cave with a pool table.

Come on!

Nancy!

Nancy!

(DOGS BARKING)

Beat it!

Come on, hurry!

(BIGFOOT BARKING)

Nancy! Yoo-hoo!

Quick, quick!

Let's go! Now's our chance!

Nancy, what...

SARAH:
This is it!

The beginning of the end.

Once Irene sees it,

the whole world's gonna know.

I'll have to join a convent.

Nancy!

Marry a zoo-keeper.

I'll be a social outcast

for the rest of my life!

I'll go to my prom, the kids will

probably throw pig blood on me!

Thank you, Dad.

Sarah, don't let her in!

ERNIE:
Come on, big guy.

Rise and shine!

Don't worry.

It's the safest place in the whole house!

(CRASHING)

Ernie!

It's okay, Mom, the stairs broke!

We're all right.

Oh, good.

There you are!

Amazing. That was...

Can you imagine?

Little Bob must be in heat or something.

Every dog in the neighborhood is out here.

(SNIFFING)

My God!

What is that smell?

What the hell happened?

We decided to defrost the fridge.

Oh, God!

Is everything all right

with you kids?

Us?

Oh, hey, fine.

Wonderful.

No. Great. Really great.

(DOG GROWLING)

I got your mail.

Just put it on the fridge.

Nan, you wouldn't happen to have any

peanut butter and brewer's yeast?

I found a new diet.

Sarah, please take

the dog out of the room.

Peanut butter I know we have.

Is chunky okay?

Let me see if I can

help you, Irene.

Peanut butter's always

on the second shelf.

Great. No brewer's yeast?

No, sorry.

Never mind,

I gotta go to the market

and pick up some

cod liver oil and Tabasco.

It's a new energy diet. You

might wanna try it, George.

(CREAKING)

Exercise, Irene.

That's the only diet.

Plenty of energy right here!

Well, maybe it's just rotten

meat or eggs or something.

Exactly. No sense standing

around breathing it.

Thank you for

taking care of Little Bob.

(CRASHING)

Oh! Ernie!

What was that?

Ernie's experiment

for his science class.

(STAMMERING) He's got

one of those gerbils.

Yeah! It's so cute.

Only, it's more like...

A hamster.

Yeah, only bigger,

and it's always hungry.

Nothing more than rats getting a lucky

shake from society, if you ask me.

I know where you are if I need you.

Ernie!

Ernie, are you all right?

Boy, is this guy strong!

Ernie, give me your arms.

I'll lift you up.

It's Monday morning.

What am I gonna do about work?

You are going to call in sick,

that's what you're

going to do about work.

Dad's gonna just love that.

Can I be sick, too?

No.

I think you and Sarah will

be safer at school, Ernie.

Oh, well. At least I can

tell the kids at school

my dad creamed a Bigfoot.

You're sick, too.

We're all sick.

No one's going anywhere until

I figure out what to do!

Get out of the fridge,

Ernie.

Coffee?

Now, it took some doing, but...

At least for now

it seems to be trapped.

GEORGE:
It's okay!

So, how are you doing?

(DOG BARKING)

I don't know.

He's our little pet.

(GROWLING)

It's hurt.

Are we sure we don't have

anything that doesn't sting?

Don't I wish.

Yeah, this is going

to hurt a little, okay?

What I do is just close my

eyes real tight. Like this.

NANCY:
All right. Okay.

(BLOWING)

Good.

Does this mean we can keep him?

Oh, grow up!

Maybe we can.

I don't know.

You don't know?

The answer is "No."

Now you know.

It was just so different

when it was dead.

George, you were different.

And I'm convinced he wasn't dead.

Hey, hang on. I thought we were

gonna sell it, and get rich.

Let's keep it and get rich.

Exactly.

(GROWLING)

I don't believe this family! Sorry.

We are talking about a living,

breathing being here.

It might even be

some kind of a person.

It's a Bigfoot person.

We don't even know what it is.

We don't know

if it's male or female.

Definitely male.

How can you tell?

Oh, don't answer that, honey.

Never mind.

Nan, I don't know how, but we gotta

figure a way to keep this thing.

It's big bucks, don't you see?

I mean, it's a ticket

to a better life!

A better life for whom?

What about his life?

I'm thinking about us.

I just need time

to figure away to...

Oh, well.

At least he's safe here.

LAFLEUR:
You should not have

given up, my old friend.

The only difference

between these and those

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