Harsh Times

(orchestration plays)

(animal screeches)

(animal screeches)

(animals screech)

(faint radio transmission)

(radio transmission continues)

(sighs)

(garbled radio transmission)

(radio transmission continues)

(yells)

(gurgles)

(gunfire)

(music plays)

Cease fire!

Cease fire! Heads up!

Man down! Cease fire!

(echoes):

Stupid motherf***er!

(gasps)

(coughs violently)

(panting)

(distant dogs barking)

(speaking Spanish)

(speaks Spanish)

S.

(goat bleats)

(distant siren wailing)

What's up, Sylvia?

Cute little outfit.

You look nice.

Mike's in

the bedroom.

Yeah?

(TV news playing)

Man, I said

you look nice.

I have a court

appearance, Jim.

Well, you just

give 'em hell.

Hey.

Spiffy duds, huh?

(door opens)

You look like

a gift-wrapped turd.

Now please leave me alone.

I have to concentrate.

I have two filings

and a deposition today.

Play nice, kids.

What up, dog?

- Nothing. Just got back.

- Cool. Cool.

How was Mexico, dog?

Oh, it was a dream, man.

- Loving my woman.

- Right.

That's it.

I'm out of here.

Those are copies

of your resum.

Pass them out like candy.

'Cause I can always

print up more.

And just call me

if anything happens, okay?

And no drinking.

Come on, baby, be cool.

Honey, I'm serious.

No drinking. Okay?

- I love you.

- I love you, too.

Good luck.

Your suit's fine, okay?

Dude, she called me

a gift-wrapped turd.

(laughing)

Don't be f***ing

with her, dude.

She's pissed.

Why is she on

the warpath? Dog...

I didn't look for work

yesterday, dude.

Sold some of her CDs,

bought a couple of 40s

and a pack of GPCs.

Caught a buzz

and watched

my Chicago Vs. Lakers tapes.

(laughs):

That's on you, homie.

We didn't even

hang yesterday.

I was out of the country.

So? My old lady still

thinks it's your fault.

Huh? Huh? Hmm?

Come on, dude, let's get

the f*** out of here

and find my ass

some employment.

It's cool you driving me around?

Yeah, dude, it's cool.

It's no trouble.

(music plays)

JIM:

Here, a**hole.

Breakfast.

Oh... ho, ho...

Dog.

No pisto for me, dude.

Today's a no-pounding day.

You heard the woman.

Good. More for me.

F*** it.

Salud.

Salud.

Man, hope they put me in

the next class or I'm f***ed.

I can't pay my rent.

Landlady's about to pull

a gauge on my ass.

What happened to all that money

you saved in the army, dude?

The tax-free sh*t?

Man, bro, this f***ing

ride cleaned me out.

I guess we drank

up the rest.

(chuckles):

Dumb ass.

(laughing)

Cops better start

paying you, dude.

You spend enough

f***ing time with them.

They better start kicking me

down some paychecks, man.

They got me hopping through

hoops, you know?

"Come in for a test."

"Come back in two weeks."

Another test, another two weeks.

F***.

Sh*t gets real,

you be hating life.

Party time will be over.

Dude, you don't know how much

I'm looking forward

to this sh*t.

You know, I'll be super recruit.

I was jumping

out of choppers

in the mountains,

taking down

hard motherfuckers,

you know?

I'll be laughing my way through

LAPD's reindeer games.

Sh*t, they're

gonna love me.

Yeah, yeah, you're gonna

f***ing love them, dude.

Ah, f*** you.

I'm going to love my old lady.

I'm gonna marry homegirl.

Import her ass.

Oh, come on, man.

Dude, what happened

to all the honeys

we were gonna pimp

with your badge, dog?

You're f***ing up the plan.

I've been thinking, you know?

Love's about sacrifice.

Only true measure of it.

What would you do for Sylvia?

Get a job.

- Mm...

- Nine to f***ing five.

Yeah.

That's love.

Hey.

Good morning.

MIKE:

So when do you officially

hand your ass over to the Man?

"Mr. Jim Davis,

we regret to inform...

I had two beers, right?

Yeah.

Going f***ing

blind or something.

Okay, this letter

says, quoting...

"no longer eligible

as a police officer candidate."

What the f*** does that mean?

Come on, dude.

"no longer eligible"? I mean,

what does that sound like?

They pulled the plug, dude.

No, no...

Why?

Oh, man, I'll bet you...

I'll bet you it's

'cause I'm white.

I bet it's 'cause

you're a dick.

No, no, no, Mike,

you don't understand.

I am f***ed.

I got to get married.

Okay? INS won't let me

bring Marta across

unless I got employment.

I promised her.

This fucks up my plan.

This is f***ing bullshit, okay?

This... these f***ing

a**holes...

These f***ing a**holes!

What the f***

is their problem, man?!

This is f***ing typical

cop hate game bullshit!

Yo, yo, f***ing

chill, Magilla Gorilla.

I mean you're trippin', dude.

Hey, what the f***

are you looking at, a**hole?!

F***ing dick.

Yo, yo,

Jim, Jim...

I'm gonna f***ing kick your

teeth down your puke hole!

You f***ing want some?

Jim, Jim, dude.

Kick back, dude.

The f***ing light is green.

Get the f*** in the car.

Man, f***.

- You're going to catch

a case doing that sh*t, man.

What the f*** were you doing?

F*** the LAPD, man.

What's up with Pasadena,

Pomona, Santa Ana and all that?

Oh, no, f*** the sticks.

L.A. City's the sh*t.

Hey, Sheriff's Department.

It's good enough for the INS

and still basically L.A., right?

Yeah, Sheriff's Department,

yeah.

They make you work

the jails the first two years

or something.

I could be cracking heads

up at the Honor Ranch.

I'll give 'em a call,

start testing.

Yeah.

That's right.

Yo, it's just

a minor setback, right?

Quit trippin', dude.

Sh*t.

Hey, you know what

I want to do?

What?

I want to get f***ed up.

Me, too, man.

I got to find a job and placate

my baby, you know.

Sylvia's going

to kick your ass?

Come on, big man,

she'll be cool.

Come on.

(Korean pop music playing)

- Bye, Nicole.

- Bye.

Let me get a couple

of singles, too, please.

Sorry, you buy whole pack.

Be cool, dude.

If I buy a whole pack

I'm gonna want

to smoke it.

I just want a couple

of smokes with my beer.

City give me $1,500 ticket.

No more.

(speaking Korean)

(speaking Korean)

A**hole.

(speaking Korean)

(yelling)

(gunshots)

- Thank you, sir.

- Thank you, sir.

Oh, sh*t.

That f***ing gangster, man.

Homeboy just ran

a six second four-forty.

Damn, the chino looked

f***ing pissed, man.

You think we'll be able

to go back there?

I hate that sh*t.

F***in' chino lookin' at us

like we were gonna bust him?

Come on, dude.

We're wearin' suits, man.

We totally look like cops.

He said he got fined

for that sh*t.

He was just being cautious.

Well, we got pisto,

we got frajos.

Only one thing missin'.

Be-at-ches.

Oh, yeah, I mean

besides b*tches, man.

Yesca?

Mm-hmm.

Bingo.

I need to feel

some reefer madness.

You sure you want

to score some bud, dude?

You haven't smoked out

since like forever, man.

I said I want

to get f***ed up, man.

F*** this purity bullshit.

Yeah... f*** purity.

Aw, man, look at this

zero-head, dog.

Stupid-ass cholo.

Look at that.

That dude's slangin', dog.

Want to get

a dime?

JIM:

No, I want it all.

Go for the stash, man.

Whoa, go, go, go.

Hey, hey, yo, yo.

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