Heart Condition Page #4

I got rich defending hookers?

You know what the cash return is

on a pair of bowling shoes?

We're on our way back

to the pin setters.

Loosen up.

Two drink minimum

if you don't bowl.

Yeah, that's right.

There's a two drink minimum.

There's nothing wrong

with making a little profit.

Now say hello to Bubba.

Ask him how his mother is.

Order a couple of beers.

Hello, Bubba, how's your mother?

She died last summer.

Well, I'm a little behind.

I'll take a couple of beers.

Which way to the pin setters?

Stone!

Every one of these mothers

is a Black Panther

hungry for white meat.

I'm gonna wind up

dish of the day.

What are we doing here?

See that hole over there?

The one that looks like a duck?

Yeah.

- You feel a pipe in there?

- Yeah.

Alright, pull it out.

Yeah, that's it.

Jesus!

My emergency cash reserve.

How much is in here?

Two hundred thousand dollars.

And I'm the only guy who was

ever able to take it with him.

- Don't want your beers?

- Have a beer.

- Yeah, maybe just one.

- Yeah, one beer.

- Can I help you?

- It's my brother Archimedes.

You find what

you were looking?

- Nice guy, I left him the bar.

- A few balls, a couple of pins.

Here it is.

How do they know about my stash?

Maybe a hundred and fifty grand?

How did you know 150?

I left $200,000.

It's supposed to be

two hundred thousand.

Oh, I see, you steal

from your own brother.

You own. Your flesh.

You know, Ma said you was...

you know, if I wasn't

dead, I'd...

Hit him one time for me,

would you?

Did you know that

this is extortion money?

That your brother was

about to be brought up

on Federal charges when he died?

Yo, slap him one time for me.

I could walk out of here

with this evidence

Or, I can walk out of here

with this evidence and you.

It's your choice, Archimedes.

Right.

Hold it, hold it,

wait.

What?

Oh, sh*t!

Jesus!

Get him out of there!

- That was the most stupid...

- I'm sorry.

Just start... let's go!

Go, go, go!

You want to tell me what

the hell that was all about?

I was talking to a friend

of mine the other day.

I hate to drop names.

I said, "Bobby. "

Well, that's Bobby DeNiro,

but that's beside the point.

"Bobby, the thing is this. "

Listen, what time is it?

It's time for you

to get your big-fat

extra - crispy - bucket -o'- chicken

two - liter - pepsi - cola - drinking

ass out of bed, that's

what time it is. Allez, allez!

We must exercise!

Come on, Jack, let's go!

One, two, three, four! Come on,

Jack. Your public is waiting.

Public my ass.

It'll be your ass

if you don't get up.

We have to go downtown,

exercise, we have to get suits.

Get your black ass

out of here, will you?

"Get your black ass out of here"

I like that, get down, brother!

Give me five! Alright!

There's five.

F*** off!

Sh*t! Hey.

I never knew there were

so many hills in Hollywood.

F*** off!

Come on, come on, look at me!

I'm running circles around you.

You're supposed to be a cop?

Is this L.A.'s finest, huh?

- I'm a cop!

- Yeah, yeah! Oh, well!

Get the f*** out of here! Sh*t!

Good afternoon, sir.

He bought a $80,000

Mercedes-Benz with cash?

It's not the Jack Moony I know.

I don't know what he's doing.

Huh, whatever he's doing,

it's got to be illegal.

Ow, we better get ready.

They're dropping

Crys off at eight.

Is she really gonna

like this stuff?

Ah, she never seemed

to mind 'em on me.

Oh, come on, Moony. Look,

we fooled around, alright?

She took some pictures,

that was the end.

It wasn't serious.

I was a single guy.

You heard my mother.

Last thing I needed or wanted

was to be tied down.

What you gotta face, is that

she left the old Jack Moony.

This isn't the same girl

who was on the street

dating cops

and eating cheeseburgers.

- She's a different woman now.

- Same job.

Didn't she tell you

about going to art school?

Huh.

It was a pipe dream,

you saw her stuff.

Oh, and we're art critics

now, huh?

You know, you see

a kid fishing in a mud puddle

is that any reason

to take away his pole?

People have dreams, Moony,

they have ambitions

and when she tells you about her

dreams, you gotta respect them.

I always listened.

Yeah?

I listened.

Alright, alright.

What's the name

of her dog back home?

Huh, huh.

Henry.

How many sisters does she have?

Two, Lisa and Joanie.

What's her favorite movie?

Rambo.

Rambo?

Pinocchio.

And I knew all of that

in the first half-hour.

You see? That's why

she left Ohio, Moony.

Nobody listened.

Nobody took her seriously.

You're wondering

why she left you.?

I kept her off the streets.

Yes, by wrapping her up so

tight, she couldn't move.

You wanna keep everybody

in little boxes don't ya?

You want to keep me in the

ghetto, Crys back at home.

Even that knucklehead Wendt.

You tell me that you don't

resent him being your superior.

Yeah, you can't, can you?

We're all like the film

in the goldfish bowl at home.

You wanna keep us all there

where you can see us, don't you?

You don't want it

to be developed.

Know how much

that costs to process?

Hey, it costs

to go to art school.

It costs to be a lawyer,

costs to be a f***ing detective.

Some of us are willing

to pay the price, Moony.

Hey, there's nothing

to be scared of, Moony.

Nobody's out to get you.

You don't have to be scared

that we're all gonna leave you.

Would you like something

from the bar?

- Yeah.

- Ask her first.

- What do you think?

- A glass of wine.

- Wine list, a couple of Evians.

- The wine list and two Evians.

The wine list.

I didn't know you

knew what Evian was.

Bottled water.

I'm learning.

What are you doing?

Is this some kind of a setup?

- What do you mean?

- Are you gonna bust me?

For what?

Bein' beautiful?

Touche.

Did you process any of my film?

Why?

Wondered.

It's still

in the goldfish bowl.

Good.

Nice suit.

Yeah.

Polished fingernails?

Didn't I tell I knew

what a woman likes?

You can't afford

that on a cop's salary.

Oh, I, uh,

I came into some money.

How?

Oh, sh*t, how?

Don't tell me it's

an inheritance.

No, she's too smart for that.

Tell malpractice.

Malpractice.

Your heart surgery.

Yeah, they stitched me up

with a sponge inside.

Good, good.

Judges like that one.

So then you quit the force

and bought Italian suits?

- Right, yeah.

- I don't believe that.

Yeah, neither do I.

Okay, maybe you better go

and call Teller.

That's dangerous.

- I don't want to.

- Lucky.

- How's Chuck?

- He's fat.

I would like to tempt you with

the specials before you decide.

For appetizer, we have

a shitake mushroom

on the salmon dim sum dumpling

in a red currant sauce.

Oh, Salmon dumplings

in currant sauce.

Are you still puttin'

bourbon in his milk?

No.

We're both reformed men.

That's too bad.

There is also a special

poached scallop with taro

over a bed of

squid ink fettuccine

with a ginger root sauce...

Yeah. Do you remember

your tablecloth?

Yeah.

Well, I had

it cleaned and mended.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes