Heartbreak Ridge Page #2

So keep down the chatter

while I get my beauty sleep.

Yes. Groupies are fun

but you need your vitamins...

...because those babes'll wear you out.

- Anything else, General?

- No. That's fine.

What are all those medals?

I'll never tell.

At least, not while the sun is shining.

This babe is whacked.

She doesn't know what's

twelve inches long and white.

Nothing.

No offense. Just working on my routine.

I'll tell you what's black and bleeding,

if it don't shut up.

Mellow, man. It's gonna be a nice day.

Tell the driver, I'll be right out.

Don't worry. I'll use my plastic.

It's my treat for your hospitality.

Thanks, I'll get the tip.

My buddy will take care of that.

He asked me to tell you that

there's no sunshine in the men's john.

I'm here, baby. Let's do some distance.

Son of a b*tch.

You're going to slurp my lifer's juice

out of my own cup?

Yes. I guess I should have

gotten shots beforehand.

If your brain was as quick as your mouth,

you'd be a twenty-star general by now.

If I was half as ugly as you,

Sergeant Major...

...I'd be a poster boy for a prophylactic.

Still a mean and nasty bastard.

Goddamn! It's sure good to see you, Tom,

back where you belong.

Take it easy.

Everybody will think I'm spoken for.

'Morning, sir.

Sergeant Major?

Coffee, sir?

Negative.

Gunnery Sergeant Thomas Highway,

reporting for duty, sir.

That Operation Officer's farthole is sewed

so tight, he shits out of his mouth.

Academy?

Big-time football hero.

When am I ever going to get a break?

Never.

- Sergeant Major?

- Sir!

Bring in Gunnery Sergeant Highway.

Been in a long time.

I've felt a little heat, sir.

Korea. Dominican in 1965.

Three tours of duty in Vietnam.

This old bulldog is carrying

so much shrapnel...

...he can't pass through

an airport metal detector.

I haven't yet had the privilege of combat.

I recently came over

from Supply and Logistics.

An unappreciated field of endeavor, sir.

Quite.

My record of achievement thus far

has been exemplary...

...and I fully intend for that to continue.

Sir.

I want this battalion to be

the class of the division.

I expect my noncommissioned officers

to lead by example.

Public fighting and insubordination

to civilian authority...

...are not what I call "good standards."

It was a minor altercation, sir.

You make a habit of that, Gunney.

A year ago you hit an officer.

I went to Annapolis with that man.

You try that with me, Sergeant Highway...

...and you'll drag your butt in a sling

for a month, understand?

Yes, sir.

I don't know what strings you pulled to

get here, but I assure you, I don't like it.

This is the new Marine Corps.

The new breed.

Characters like you are an anachronism.

You should be sealed in a case that reads,

"Break Glass Only in the Event of War."

I have no tolerance for you old-timers

who think you know better. Understand?

I understand a lot of body bags get

filled if I don't do my job, sir.

Major!

Division has assigned Gunney Highway

to our Reconnaissance Platoon.

Yes, Recon.

Their last sergeant was

an old-time combat vet, too.

But he went ROAD on me...

..."Retired On Active Duty."

Had a few months to retirement,

figured he'd coast.

Allowed the men to lapse into mediocrity.

You're close to mandatory retirement

yourself. Aren't you, Highway?

That's right, Major.

I ask for Marines,

the division sends me relics.

The men in Recon Platoon are less than

highly motivated, to say the least.

I want those men in shape.

I'll make life-takers

and heartbreakers out of them, sir.

Dismissed.

Is he always like that,

or is he trying to make a good impression?

He even consults the Marine Corps manual

before he mounts his old lady...

...just to insure he performs in an orderly,

proficient, military manner.

Chow with Helen and me tonight.

She can't wait to see you.

Later, we can stomp some brain cells

and tell some stories.

- I'd like to, but I'd better get organized.

- Sure. I understand.

Excuse me, sir.

I mean, Gunney. Sergeant Major.

Sir, this is Gunnery Sergeant Highway.

He's been assigned to Recon Platoon.

Outstanding! Welcome aboard.

I have to hightail it.

I'm late for pre-scuba school.

His mama know he's playing Marine?

By the way, he's Lieutenant Ring.

Your platoon leader.

Thanks a lot.

You think you were just going to tilt nipple

to a bunch of no-rank fuzzbutts?

Want me to intro you to your troops?

- No. I'll take care of it.

- Take my pickup.

Thanks. Where is it?

You just tell by the sign.

It says, "Sergeant Major."

- Is this Recon Platoon?

- No speak English.

- You?

- No habla.

My name is Gunnery Sergeant Highway.

I've drunk more beer, pissed more blood,

banged more quiff, busted more balls...

...than all you numbnuts put together.

Major Powers has put me in charge

of this Recon Platoon.

We take care of ourselves!

You couldn't take care of a wet dream.

- God loves you.

- I know that.

You men do not impress me!

Recon Platoon kicks butt!

You think you can slip and slide just

because your last sergeant was a p*ssy...

...a short-timer just marking the days.

You're going to start acting like Marines,

right now.

Who invited you?

I'm not doing this because I want to take

long showers with you a**holes.

And I don't want to get my head shot off

in some faraway land...

...because you don't habla. Comprende?

- Right!

- You?

- Yes, Gunney!

"Girl, you know I think you're fine

"and you've got that big behind"

Well, well, well.

I'm here to tell you all

that life as you know it has ended.

You should all go to town tonight.

Laugh and make fools of yourselves.

Rub your little peckers against your honey,

or stick it in a knothole in a fence...

...but whatever it is, just get rid of it.

Because at 0600 tomorrow...

...your ass is mine.

Where's your bunk?

What's going on?

- Let's have it.

- What are you talking about?

- The money from my ticket.

- No need to use violence.

I'm a Capricorn, a peace lover.

I was just a little down on my luck.

I got some money right here. It's all I got.

And the meal.

- Meal?

- Yes. The meal.

- That's really all I've got. Right there.

- And the tip.

- No. That's really it!

- You owe me.

It's my will against yours,

and you will lose.

So 0600 tomorrow.

That's 6:
00 in the morning

for all you people who don't habla.

Damn! He just tore off my ear!

He's lucky he had a chance to escape

before I kicked his ass...

...big leatherneck, jarhead motherf***er!

Something must be done

about this Gunney Highway.

Yes! But what are we going to do?

- Wait till the Swede gets out of the brig!

- That's it! The Swede!

- Yes! He'll rip his head off and dump in it!

- Then he'll eat it!

- Yes!

- The Swede! Goodbye, Highway!

Swede! Swede! Swede!

Hey, baby.

I called his wife...

Do you fool around on the first date?

Damn you.

Don't you know how to write or call?

I didn't want to cause you any

sleepless nights thinking about me.

- I'll get you a beer.

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