Hell Drivers Page #4

Now, get me some fags.

- Is that right, you done 17 runs today?

- Yeah.

- That's pretty close, eh, Red?

- What about it?

Pop's done better than that driving solo.

If you and spaghetti try any more

of them stock tactics on me,

I'll show you a thing or two

you haven't even heard about.

The trouble is, when I teach them,

it's the hard way.

Maybe afterwards, you won't be in any condition

to use them. You understand me?

Yeah, I think so.

Here, where is old spaghetti, anyway?

He's in bed.

Somebody sideswiped him today.

That's what you two was doing

in that ploughed field, is it?

Thought you'd stopped to have a kip.

- If you saw us, why didn't you give us a hand?

- Our job's ballast, not breakdowns.

The recovery people don't like it either.

If they heard what you did today,

you'd wake up wearing their footprints.

Is somebody going to write to them about it?

- What?

- I said, is somebody...

Alright, I heard you.

What are you trying to do? Be funny?

Do you know...

I don't like your attitude.

You've got a chip on your shoulder.

- You think so?

- Yeah.

If I was to knock it off,

your head might go with it.

Well, I'm the last man who'd want

to walk around without a head.

Huh?

That's better.

Here, get a hold of this, will you?

I've got two jobs here, see?

I'm the pace-setter and the road foreman.

That means I'll be watching you

from two directions at once,

to beat you on the road

and to beat you down when you get out of line.

I'm not looking for trouble.

Unless I'm pushed.

Even if you're pushed.

Hey, Tub

Over here Red

Jill:
are you going to the dance tonight Tom?

Yeah, I was just going to ask you.

We're all going in Johnny's car

after you've finished eating.

Do you like my skirt?

Yeah, sensational.

Woman:
Jill!

Excuse me.

Hello, Red. You boys going

to behave yourselves tonight?

Why don't you ask them?

- My dance.

- Oh, but I can't.

- Shall we sit this one out?

- Yes, dear. Ha, ha

- You busy?

- I'm waiting for someone...

Then you're not busy.

Excuse me, sonny.

- Remember me last week?

- No.

I'll remind you.

You're not married, are you?

No.

Are you?

Silly I like you. You're real dry.

Hey, Dusty over here.

- Dust, how did you make out?

- All right.

- Hey, boys, there's a bird sitting over there...

- Are you up to your tricks again?

Where are all the seats? What am I, an orphan?

All right. Here you are, sit down.

Hey hey cut it out

Hey, fellas fellas

Look.

It can't be.

- It is. It's Lucy

- Done up like a dog's dinner.

How about it?

- Hello, boys.

- Suddenly it's awfully hot in here.

Red:
where've you been keeping that dress?

Lucy:
mind if I join you?

Mind?

We've kept this place especially for you.

Any fella that tries to take you

away from us, we'll fix him up.

- You make the birds here look like hyenas.

- Get on your plates of meat...

- give the lady a seat.

- Call yourself a gentleman?

Your ladyship

- thanks, Tinker.

- Oh

He'll live. I want to thank you boys

for all calling round to pick me up.

Johnny:
well we thought

you was coming with Gino, Lucy

Jill, want to dance?

Oh, you kids go ahead and dance.

- Don't mind poor little me.

- Lucy, dance with me.

All:
No, no

Get out of it

# rock 'n' roll

Hey, remember me?

Having fun?

Yeah, fine. And you?

So-so.

There's a big brute I want to dance with

and he won't ask me.

That's too bad.

What are you trying to prove?

That you're somebody's best friend?

- Now, look.

- Why don't you get it into your thick skull

that I'm not anybody's girl and I'm not married

Gino's a sweet guy.

He's in a strange country.

I was just trying to be nice to him.

Do I have to suffer for that?

If you don't like it, that's your problem.

I don't want to be the one

that puts him out, that's all.

Come on, let's dance.

- Let's dance.

- I'm waiting for Tom.

On second thoughts, I think I will.

I just can't imagine

what's happened to my boyfriend.

I sent him for a bottle of coke

about half an hour ago.

- Perhaps he thought you said bucket of coke.

- You're very humorous.

Hahaha!

Tom...

don't tell me you don't feel the same way as I do.

What are you trying to do?

I'm human, too, you know.

It's not fair if two people feel

the same way about each other.

What's wrong with admitting it?

I suppose you're the type who'd like to see

two men shooting it out over you.

As long as you win.

Oh, Tom, I don't know what it is.

It's not going to work, Lucy.

It's got to work.

You're crazy.

You don't know anything about me.

I don't.

But I'll just love finding out.

- I'm not kidding, this is a nerve test.

- Really?

A test for steady nerves, steady hands.

You'll never drive a truck

if you can't hold these like this.

- Oh, you're not going to burn me?

- No, no.

- Oh, careful

- Steady

This is where it becomes very important.

You've got to hold still now.

- Are you ready?

- Yeah.

Happy birthday to you,

happy birthday to you...

Oh where have you been?

I was told my old man wanted to see me

in the pub opposite.

- Wasn't he there?

- No. I looked in all the pubs to make sure.

That's funny.

Must have been some other Bill

I was told to look for.

Maybe you invented the story

so you could walk off with my girl.

That's right. You've had a good drink,

now insult me.

A man of my position, taking care of your girl.

You're lucky I didn't charge you for my time.

Piecework rates ha, ha

- Excuse me.

- Oh, sure.

Ha, ha

- Oh, no, you don't. Not this time.

- Look, I said "excuse me" once.

Do you mind?

Get over there.

Don't worry, we won't fall over ya.

I said, let go. She's my girl

and I was dancing with her.

Now, look, boy, steady.

This is only a joke. Don't get rough.

Why don't you buzz off? We let you truck drivers

use our hall and you muck up our evening.

Ask anyone, they'll say the same.

- We're sick and tired of you.

- Hey, Red

Yeah?

There's a bloke here says him and his mates

are sick and tired of the lot of us

Ask him what he's going to do about it.

Hey, Tub, Scottie, Johnny come on.

Now, then, Red, no trouble. No trouble, please.

Get the police immediately.

Red

Red

Come on, your right your right

Red, Red, the cops!

Blow the cops. You get stuck in. Come in.

Hey, come back, yellow belly

Come back, you

- Tom, Tom

- Hey come back yellow belly!

Hey, you we're coming up

better say your prayers.

- There he is

Dusty:
Come on, boys.

- Come out, yellow

- Come on, get out of there

Ma west:
stop that!

Stop that this instant do you hear?

- But we all got rnicked except him

- Red come away from that door

r d t's bt ts a y o

m a w s o't car at t's abott!

Get back to your rooms this minute

or I'll hay into you with this poker

Red:
all right we'll be seeing him

Tub:
all right yellow belly

we'll get you tomorrow

How many of those green sweets

can you get for a penny?

- Three.

- Oh.

Here, you'll like these.

Buttered Brazils

Oh, boy!

- You've got more than half

- I haven't.

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