Herbie Rides Again Page #3

of her than I am of my uncle.

Nonsense! She's just

a very high-spirited young lady.

That's for sure.

Goodbye.

Don't weaken about the firehouse.

Don't worry, young man.

Call my nephew, wherever he is,

and get him here.

Yes, sir. Mr. Barnsdorf is on the

phone.

Yeah, Barnsdorf, what do you want?

Can we dig yet, Hawk?

My boys are getting itchy.

I'll tell you when to dig.

I got some high-price

digging equipment and crew

sitting around playing gin-rummy,

waiting for you.

It's costing you 80 grand a day.

Just stop bugging me, Barnsdorf.

You'll get the order to start

any moment now.

And what do you want?

I'm sorry. I called the motel.

Your nephew checked out.

What do you mean, checked out?

When? Where?

Who told him he could check out?

How dare he disappear

when he knows I'm worried sick!

I'll tear his chicken-livered gizzard

to pieces! I'll stomp him!

I'll take this letter knife and stab

him in his ungrateful breastbone.

You know me, Millicent! Normally,

I'm a kind, fun-loving fella.

But when I get crossed, I go bananas.

Yes? It's your nephew.

Willoughby?

Willoughby, where are you?

Hi, Uncle. I thought I'd save time

and phone you the news.

Marvelous. Great. Smart boy!

That Hawk blood tells in the end.

All ashore that's going ashore.

What's all that noise?

And what news?

The news I was leaving town.

Leaving town?

I'm on the ship-to-shore phone...

..from the deck

of the Swedish freighter,

the Gustav Gustaffson

bound for Helsinki.

Helsinki?

I'm glad you're taking it like this.

You should

leave Mrs.. Steinmetz alone.

Why you...!

Don't worry,

you'll feel better in the morning.

Don't talk like an idiot!

I feel better now.

Alonzo Hawk may be betrayed, but he

is never defeated. Out of my way!

Since none of you pitiful

excuses for men have the muscle

to move a feeble old lady,

I'll do it myself,

like I have to do everything.

- Now, now...

- Shut up!

We'll start on number one,

harassment. I wrote the book on it.

Shut off her phone,

turn off her water,

sic the health and building

inspectors on her.

- Steal her dog!

- She doesn't have a dog.

She doesn't have a dog? A little old

lady in a place like that?

Who looks out for her?

How does she get around?

She has a little car she uses.

- Well, go and pick it up!

- Yes, Mr. Hawk.

Bunch of lame brains. Hold it!

You fellas will probably even foul up

this simple assignment.

The first team is on the job now.

I'll get the car myself.

Overeducated pinheads!

Gentlemen, take notes.

Learn how the grown-ups do it.

You may be unaware of it,

but I began my fabulous career

as a repossessor of motorcars.

At the tender age of 1 9, I was

the best-known repossessor of cars

west of the Mississippi.

Hot-Wire Hawk, they called me.

Observe, gentlemen.

Screwdriver, pair of pliers,

and a piece of wire.

Now check your watches!

I will return

with the object of my mission

in 1 5 minutes or less. Let's go!

Madam is not at home, sir.

Thank you. I won't need you

any more today.

Very well, sir.

Learn something when you're young

and you'll never forget it.

Except, a six-year-old could steal

this once-cylinder hairdryer!

Quiet!

Alright, buddy, let's get this thing

out of here... Hello, Mr. Hawk.

What are you doing

in this little car?

Just shut up and push!

Certainly, Mr. Hawk. One tiny thing.

Is the car out of gear, sir?

Of course it's out of gear,

you nitwit! Just push!

Alright, Mr. Hawk.

OK, push.

Hey, wait a minute!

What're you doing to my cab?

Are we trying to get tough,

Mr. Hawk?

Don't you dare threaten me!

Alright, Mr. Hawk.

- Well?

- Three minutes to go.

Hello, Commissioner.

Got a little problem.

We got to tow him out of here.

Now, Mr. Hawk, sit quietly this time.

Don't touch the pedals or gears.

Don't order me around!

I will do as I please.

The Traffic Commissioner

shall hear about this.

I am the Commissioner.

Then what are you doing

in that monkey suit?

The Traffic Commissioner

would dress in dignified clothes.

This happens to be my dress uniform.

I'm on my way to a ceremony

for I Am A Policeman Day.

OK, let's go.

Commissioner, call your office.

There's been an accident.

See the man, see the man.

One minute. He'll never make it.

If Mr. Hawk says he'll do it,

he'll... Here he is!

- Get that car, dead or alive!

- Right away, sir.

Mr. Hawk? If you'll sign

a few of these citations,

compliments of the Commissioner.

Well, he's got more stuff

than I thought.

Yes, I'm sorry he's going, too.

Alright, see you later. Bye-bye.

Flight 38, for Las Vegas.

Mother, you've never seen

Uncle Alonzo in such a rage.

He's probably having the airport

watched. But he won't find me.

I'm wearing a disguise. A disguise.

A beard and a moustache.

I know I promised not to grow

a beard when I left home.

Don't you understand?

It isn't real. No.

I will not go back

and apologize to Uncle Alonzo.

He is a greedy,

unscrupulous, no-good, thieving...

..coyote. Thank you, miss.

No, Mother, my asthma's

not coming back. Nothing's wrong!

Everything is just fine now.

This is the turning point

of my life.

Uncle Alonzo pushed me about.

You always told me what to do.

Then I met this

perfectly wonderful girl.

I was even afraid of her, till now.

I've just decided something, Mother.

I am not going to be

a rabbit any more.

Goodbye, Mother.

Come along, Herbie, off to market.

Thank you, Herbie.

Let me see now.

Half a dozen tomatoes.

The broccoli looked very nice

yesterday.

And what else was there?

We can see the car, Mr. Hawk.

- Moving in for the kill.

- They're moving in for the kill now.

Well, what happened?

You were moving in for the kill!

Negative. A little premature, sir.

She's a desperate woman.

Don't worry, she won't get away.

Another short cut, Herbie?

Where is she now?

She's still going up and up.

It's incredible.

She's driving like a madman.

Herbie, behave yourself.

You knocked my glasses off.

Well, where on earth is she?

Don't answer it! It'll be Hawk.

Look!

No, sir. The phone didn't ring.

Were you trying to reach us?

Did you grab the car?

Any moment now. There it goes.

Into the Sheraton Palace Hotel.

The Sheraton Palace Hotel?

May I draw your attention

to the superb baby shrimp?

Alright, Herbie.

But you won't convince me

this is a short cut to the market.

Gentlemen, have you a reservation?

There it is!

Someone stop her!

- Don't let her get away.

- C'mon, let's go.

I get the creeps

from that weird little car...

- What's wrong with you?

- There it is.

Millicent, you're getting hysterical.

Take two aspirins and lie down.

One of us must keep our nerve.

C'mon, move it! We've got it trapped.

Stop woolgathering, Herbie.

We really must get to the market.

Look out, it's coming back!

Grandma, I was worried about you.

Are you alright?

Wonderful.

I had a drive on the bridge.

- Let me help, Mrs.. Steinmetz.

- Mr. Whitfield. Nice to see you.

I thought you were

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