His Girl Friday Page #4

BURNS:

Was it my fault? Did I know that

coal mine was going to have another

cave-in? I meant to be with you on

our honeymoon, Hildy -- honest I

did.

HILDY:

All I know is that instead of two

weeks in Atlantic City with my

bridegroom, I spent two weeks in a

coal mine with John Kruptzky -- age

sixty-three -- getting food and air

out of a tube! You don't deny that.

Do you?

BURNS:

Deny it! I'm proud of it! We beat

the whole country on that story.

HILDY:

Well, suppose we did? That isn't

what I got married for. What's the

good of -- Look, Walter, I came up

here to tell you that you'll have to

stop phoning me a dozen times a day --

sending twenty telegrams -- all the

rest of it, because I'm --

BURNS:

Let's not fight, Hildy. Tell you

what. You come back to work on the

paper and if we find we can't get

along in a friendly way, we'll get

married again.

HILDY:

What?!!

BURNS:

I haven't any hard feelings.

HILDY:

Walter, you're wonderful in a

loathesome sort of way. Now, would

you mind keeping quiet long enough

for me to tell you what I came up

here for?

BURNS:

(rising, reaching for

his hat)

Sure, come on. We'll have some lunch

and you can tell me everything.

HILDY:

(also rising)

I have a lunch date. I just want --

BURNS:

You can break it, can't you?

HILDY:

No, I can't.

BURNS:

Sure you can. Come on.

DIFFERENT ANGLE:

HILDY:

Don't tell me what to do! We're

divorced -- I'm a free woman. You're

not my husband and you're not my

boss! And what's more, you're not

going to be my boss.

BURNS:

What do you mean by that?

HILDY:

Just what I said. That's what I --

BURNS:

You mean you're not coming back to

work here?

HILDY:

That's the first time you've been

right today. That's what I --

BURNS:

(still interrupting)

You've had a better offer, eh?

HILDY:

You bet I've got a better offer.

BURNS:

Well, go on and take it. Work for

somebody else! That's the gratitude

I get for --

HILDY:

I know, Walter, but I --

BURNS:

(ignoring her)

What were you when you came here

five years ago? A little college

girl from a School of Journalism! I

took a little doll-faced mugg --

HILDY:

You wouldn't have taken me if I hadn't

been doll-faced!

BURNS:

Why should I? I thought it would be

a novelty to have a face around here

a man could look at without

shuddering.

HILDY:

Listen, Walter --

BURNS:

(going right on)

I made a great reporter out of you,

Hildy, but you won't be half as good

on any other paper, and you know it.

You need me and I need you -- and

the paper needs both of us.

HILDY:

Well, the paper'll have to learn to

do without me. And so will you. It

just didn't work out, Walter.

WIDER ANGLE:

BURNS:

It would have worked if you'd been

satisfied with just being editor and

reporter. But no! You had to marry

me and spoil everything.

HILDY:

(indignantly)

I wasn't satisfied! I suppose I

proposed to you!

BURNS:

Well, you practically did! Making

goo-goo eyes at me for two years

till I broke down. And I still claim

I was tight the night I proposed. If

you'd been a gentleman you'd have

forgotten all about it. But not you!

HILDY:

(speechless)

You -- you --

She grabs something and chucks it at him. He ducks. The phone

rings.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes