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Hobo With A Shotgun
Spare some change?
Come on!
If you wanna make my money you
gotta get rougher than this.
Hey!
Hey you!
You wanna get in on this?
Come On.
Ten dollars.
Ten dollars.
Come on!
Hey,
f*** you then!
You'll never make
money without me.
Alright, alright
let's see some blood.
That's it.
That's it.
Go damn it,
HELP me,
Please!
Lady, please help me,
get this off me!
They're gonna f***ing kill me.
You've gotta help me here!
Please,
get this off my neck.
Get back,
don't leave me!
F***.
You!
Please you've
gotta help me here.
If you don't help me my hand's
coming off my f***ing body.
Please just untie me,
that's it.
Oh brother of mine.
Look at you now.
Boys. This isn't
a joke anymore.
You weren't planning on
leaving town without
saying goodbye were ya?
Yeah, we've been looking
all over for you.
I was gettin' worried.
I'm your uncle.
I've known you since
you were f***in' babies!
This cocksucker gave me the
shittiest Christmas presents.
I hate Christmas.
You f***ing brats!
F*** off!
Drake, stop this,
we're family!
It's the rules,
Logan.
You're our lucky contestant.
No,
please.
Don't put me in there.
Show 'em how to play boys.
Slick. You we're always
my favorite nephew
I swear to God
I mean that.
Get your feet in that
f***ing deathhole!
F***!
Ivan my boy.
I want everybody here
to appreciate this.
Time to get the show
on the road boy-yo.
Alright you f***ing androids.
My father's got something
he wants you all to see.
And I swear, anybody looks
away for even a second,
I'll make them wish they
we're f***ing aborted.
Ladies and Gentlemen,
welcome to the Drake Show.
Tonight's special episode
thrills, and chills, and
my own personal favorite.
Lots and lots of
that red sh*t
that flows inside
all our bodies.
IVAN?
CHEER you f***ers!
Thank you.
How can you watch
and not do anything?
They're going to
f***ing kill me here!
Somebody say something!
Don't just stand there!
You know, ever since our
from the hospital, I knew
he was a f***ing coward.
I'll leave town!
You'll never f***ing
see me again.
Just please, I can't
feel my legs, Drake.
He wants mercy from the Drake.
From the Drake...
And he should know
better than anybody...
mercy ain't my style.
What do you want from me?
Logan is no longer my brother.
Our relationship
has been severed.
And now he's all
alone in this world,
with nothing but a
barbed wire noose
around his neck.
You can't let him
do this!
It's not just MY
life he's ruining.
Please.
Help me.
Please!
You should have started
beggin' a long time ago.
I've never enjoyed
listening to you
as much as I do right now.
You're a f***ing animal Drake!
You're a shitty f***ing
weird little animal.
The way I see it, I'm a
f***ing miracle worker,
because I am going
to make it rain!
Gun it,
Slick!
Well, can you feel
your legs now?
Can ya?
Huh!
you wanted to say to me?
Well, thanks for tuning
in ladies and gentlemen.
Who knows,
maybe next time
one of you will be
our lucky contestant.
Enjoy the ride,
my favorite f***in' uncle.
Go the f*** home everybody!
And don't forget
to wash your d*cks!
$49.99.
Ugh.
I dare you to lick his dick.
Woo! Woo!
You bastards!
Hey Slick, you gotta
check this out man.
F***in awesome.
Hey, where the
f*** are you going?
Business with dad.
Ah.
Hey Otis.
What are ya playing?
I forgot Slick.
I spent all my
money in the arcade.
You owe me money.
You're burning me,
Otis.
Let me call my mom! I can
get my allowance early!
That must be some
hell of an allowance.
Come on man,
he's a kid,
let it slide.
What did you say to me?
You heard me.
Let it slide.
Sh-sh-sh...
The only thing
I'm gonna let slide,
is my dick in your p*ssy.
Hey, Otie -
where ya going?
Don't hurt me IVAN!
Shut the f*** up!
Did that hurt?
No.
You want to know how to
never feel pain again?
No I
don't want any more!
how to never
feel pain again?
Come on Otis!
Have at it!
You know how I can tell
I'm making you wet?
No.
Cause you're making
my dick thirsty.
What are you supposed to be?
Some kind of bad ass
murderer or something?
Why?
Does that frighten you?
If you've got money to
Baby, I've got all
kinds of money with
your name written
all over it.
Well what are
you waiting for?
Let's go.
Awesome.
Nobody messes
with you, do they?
Not if they give a
f*** about living.
So how many people
have you killed?
What am I?
A mathematician?
You're sexy...
You're f***ing right.
Are we gonna f***,
or what?
What the hell?
That's your ride b*tch.
Come on.
This was not
our f***ing deal!
I'm paying you good money.
You're gonna love this!
Let the girl go Punk.
I'm making a citizen's arrest.
And who the f*** are you?
Put the knife away kid
or I'll use it to
cut welfare cheques
from your rotten skin.
Well you better cut
one to Mother Theresa
so you can give it
to her while she's
finger banging you in hell.
Shut you filthy mouth!
Mother Theresa is
a God damn saint!
Serves you right.
What did you think?
He was gonna put a
ring on your finger?
Lock him up with
the Sodomites.
And get me the god-damned
chief of police now.
Good day sir.
No, no please,
take a seat.
I don't think I've seen
you around here before.
Let me guess, you
rode in on the rail?
That's right.
So I understand you've been
having a little bit
of difficulty with one
of our young men.
Well, I think you're gonna
need a lot of dump trucks.
Dump trucks?
I don't follow you.
You get out there,
get all the criminals,
put 'em in dump trucks.
Take em to a landfill
site and bury them.
Put 'em in the ground.
I'm not too sure
I know what you're trying
to say here, sir.
What I'm trying
to say is that
people don't go bad
like they do here.
Look,
if I'm being honest,
I can't argue with
anything you say.
Crime in this city has
become an embarrassment.
I've been suspecting
some of my boys
are working with Drake.
C of my officers are givingis
that maniac a free reign?me
So thank god for honest
people like yourself.
and send them packing.
And start this whole
operation all over again.
Between you and me, I'd love
down on Drake.
But he might as
King's fall.
You ought to read a
history book, Chief.
Now I gave you this
little bastard,
put him away for life.
Well, we'll certainly see
what we can do about that.
By the way,
did...
anybody officially
welcome you to town yet?
They never do.
Well...
welcome to F***-town.
Hold still,
you slimy maggot!
Get off me!
These two are the
princes of F*** town!
Any idea what we should
do with him, Slick?
Yeah,
hold him still.
Ah!
billboard into his chest.
You better get that
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"Hobo With A Shotgun" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 6 Sep. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/hobo_with_a_shotgun_10034>.
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