Hotel Transylvania Page #6

Tricking me?

Keeping me here forever when

you knew my dream was to go.

Liar! Liar!

Oil?

English, please.

Your voice is really annoying.

Wait, l speak frozen.

He says, "Dracula has brought

a human into the hotel."

-A human?

-Stay close, pookie!

He says, "There is ze human."

He has a French accent.

Johnny's not a human.

He's my right arm's cousin.

-He's lying.

-Yeah.

And why is he picking his nose?

He says, "lt's a long story."

Hey, wait, no! Get off me!

He says, "Behold ze human."

l don't believe it.

ls it true? Are you a human?

Yes.

l'm so sorry.

l don't care. l still want to be with you.

Well, tough.

'Cause l don't want to be with you.

Because you're a monster.

And l hate monsters.

Goodbye.

Please don't hurt me!

This is all your fault!

-We're getting out of here.

-l'm never coming back here.

-l thought l smelled a human.

-"Human-free"? What a rip.

Here he comes. Count Crock-ula.

l'm just glad my eyes are stitched shut,

'cause l don't even want to...

Mavis, honey, are you in there?

Mavis? Mavis?

Mavis, where are you?

Mavis?

Dad, can you do me a favor?

Yes, yes, of course, darling. Anything.

Will you erase my mind?

No, no, no, no. No, l won't do that.

There's too much l want you to remember.

You were right, Dad. The humans hate us.

Sweetheart, there are so many

eligible monsters out there.

You're so young to...

What is it? What are you reading?

"Two lonely bats crashed in the night.

"They felt a Zing. Love at first sight.

"They knew right then

they would be husband and wife.

"For a Zing only happens once in your life.

"Your Zing will come, my love.

"Cherish it.

"Love, Mommy."

-l thought we Zinged, Dad.

-You and Johnny?

l guess it was only me.

But you should be happy, Dad.

There's no reason for me to leave.

l have no more dreams. l'm just like you now.

Martha, what have l done?

-Where is my bill?

-Over here. l'm next.

-l'm checking out.

-Take my key! Take my key!

What is this minibar charge?

Honey, the kids threw

the minibar out the window.

-And that's our fault?

-Well...

Excuse me! Pardon, yeah.

Excuse me, l got a couple

of people to express mail.

Friends, please, stop.

lt's too late, rat-bat!

Please, l'm begging you.

l need you to help me find Johnny.

The human? He could've killed us!

He touched my guitar!

He put his hand in my mouth

to see if it would disappear.

He let me eat his scooter!

l know l lied.

l was wrong.

But you have to believe this:

Johnny wasn't a bad guy.

The truth is, l don't even know

if humans are bad anymore.

Frank, come on, buddy. You understand.

He's not talking to you.

First you tell us humans are bad,

now they're good.

What else?

Up is down, cold is hot, gremlins don't smell.

Hey!

l really liked Johnny, cousin or no.

He told fun stories.

l think they Zinged.

They Zinged?

But l got in the way.

You only Zing once in your life.

-Oy, now you're short-circuiting.

-l don't care!

Well, what are we doing? Let's get Johnny.

Come on!

-Yeah, let's do it!

-Come on!

Yeah!

We should have

honeymooned at your parents!

Okay, okay, where am l going?

The human world,

before Johnny's gone forever.

But what about the sun?

l don't know. l'll just have to roll.

He just rolls. Rollability.

So we follow his boot-prints.

When they run out,

that's where you come in, Wayne.

-Me?

-There!

Yes, l knew something would

fall out of that backpack.

That stinks!

Work your magic.

Wait, you want me to track the smell?

No. My sniffing tracking

days are way behind me.

Do you know how many

diapers l've changed?

How many number twos

have destroyed this thing?

But...

Hey! Take it easy! Watch it!

Sit.

Smell. l said smell.

Not me, the shirt! The shirt!

Do any of your kids still respect you?

Give me a second. Yeah. Winnie!

Front and center!

He got into a car. A '86 Fiat.

lt needs a little transmission work,

but otherwise okay.

lt drove through town to the airport.

Flight 497.

8:
00 a.m. departure.

That's in 1 5 minutes.

Seat 23A.

He ordered the vegetarian meal.

Okay, thank you, cutie.

Now, all of you, go back to your mother!

Sheep!

High five! Don't leave me hanging.

-Lots of sheep!

-l got this one.

What? Now there's no sheep in the road.

Let's go.

That was pretty sick, man.

You eat lamb chops, it's the same thing.

We don't have time for this.

Come on, let's move it!

Look, a human.

Welcome to Transylvania!

That was trippy.

Monster Festival?

What's a Monster Festival?

Did they know we were coming?

They like us?

Really?

Excuse me?

Do you know the best way to the airport?

Yes, fellow Dracula. There's only one way.

Bleh, bleh-bleh.

But it's all blocked.

We'll never make it in time.

You should have left an hour earlier.

Bleh, bleh-bleh.

l do not say "Bleh, bleh-bleh."

All right, let's just run through it on foot.

Drac, this'll protect you.

lmagine if that guy knew

he was talking to the real Drac.

He'd run for the hills!

Hold it, now. Hold it, now.

That sounds spot on.

But the only way they'd know the real us

is if we show the real us.

This could work.

You mean, like, scare them?

We haven't scared people in centuries.

l don't even think l have it in me anymore.

l got nothing. l really got nothing.

Let's just move this along.

Fire! Fire!

Fire!

l'm trying to scare you!

The real Frankenstein!

We know! We love you!

Can you sign my torch?

Listen, before anything else,

down there's the real Dracula!

Prove it.

All right. Continue.

Drac's daughter's in love,

and he's got to get to the airport!

And he can't get through this crowd!

-Why doesn't he fly?

-The sun, you idiot. He's a vampire.

That's right. Thank you, Monster Nerd.

So, people, if you really are our friends,

clear a path for the man!

Okay. All Draculas, line up.

Bleh, bleh-bleh.

Everyone else, lift the capes.

Protect our friend. Bleh, bleh-bleh.

lt's all for you, buddy.

Go ahead.

-Good luck!

-Go get 'em!

Go, Drac, go!

-Go, Drac!

-Go, Drac!

Go, Drac!

Go get 'em!

Go, Drac, go!

We love you, Dracula!

There's no choice.

Okay. Okay, l must do this.

Jonathan. Jonathan, can you hear me?

Tell me, do you dream of being a vampire?

This is how we're represented. Unbelievable.

Jonathan. Jonathan.

Can you hear me?

Whoa! Bat!

Wait, it's talking. Dracula? ls that you?

Dracula.

l can't understand you.

What? My hand's in a tan shoe?

What? Japan's eating lamb stew?

Hey, do you know you're smoking?

Pardon me. Sorry, excuse me.

Whoa! Excuse me.

-What the heck?

-How'd a bat get up this high?

Folks, l'm gonna turn on the seat belt sign.

Just a precaution while we...

While we hear a special announcement

for my dear friend Jonathan.

Dracula?

My dear boy, l have made a terrible mistake.

l was trying to keep my baby to myself,

because l knew l would always protect her.

But I reaIize now, chiIdren

need to discover things for themselves.

They'll stumble and fall, laugh and cry,

but such is Iife.

The truth is, you and Mavis are meant to be.

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