House of Bones Page #2

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- Contract issues.

- Okay, you know what?

- Okay, listen, listen.

Everything's gonna

be fine, kid, okay?

I'm just... I'm calling the bank.

On a Saturday?

Your supervisor must

really love her job.

Five daytime hours.

- That is what we agreed to.

- Okay...

Underline it.

Understand daytime.

You can scout today,

shoot tomorrow. That's it.

I understand, but we like

to shoot at night.

It's spookier.

We're offering you

national TV exposure here.

Millions of viewers.

Either you want to sell

this house, or you don't.

I'm starting to feel like

I'm doing your job here.

- Really?

- Whoa, whoa.

I'm sorry.

I still didn't catch your name.

And I'm not gonna get it. Wow.

Look, I'm sorry, okay?

He's being a jerk, all right?

- Really?

- I have to deal with it all the time, okay?

But look, I don't mean to put you

in a bad spot. We don't.

It's just easier for us

if we shoot at night. Okay?

- You have no idea, do you?

- Actually, we do.

We've done 48 shows

just like this, okay?

We control the horizontal

and the vertical.

The house is what we make it.

Well, I hope you're right.

It's just smoke and mirrors.

I promise.

It's movie magic, really.

Please?

Thank you.

My name is Sarah Minor.

Simon has my number.

If you run into

any problems, call me.

Thank you.

I could lose my job.

Here, grab this.

The camera.

Here.

Okay.

What are you doing?

Don't touch anything, man.

It's Tom's rules.

Sorry. Hey, who handles

take-out around here?

No, no, no.

Not that, Bub.

Nobody touches that.

Touch this.

Don't touch that.

Dude, don't you

make up those lines.

Listen, these work

on suction, okay?

Get it on the wall,

then pump it up.

A little suction, okay?

You get it?

We need one of these

in every room

on the far wall.

Tom will tweak the angles

once they're up.

Okay? You with me?

Got it?

This is what they, like,

climb buildings with, right?

Yeah, you sure can.

What's that toy, man?

This toy?

Well, this is no toy, okay?

Bub, this is Chucky.

Chucky, Bub.

Chucky's got balls of steel.

Literally.

He's a little bit higher up

on the food chain than you are.

All right?

EMF reader, infrared lenses,

DAT recorder.

Sennheiser MD-421 mic,

500-gigabyte hard drive,

lab kit. Okay?

Quentin had said

there would be free t-shirts?

Does that still happen?

You haven't had the talk

with him, have you?

No.

Hey, Bub, listen.

Uh, don't talk so much.

And just listen. Okay?

Stay out of the way,

stay out of the shot.

- Stay out of the shot.

- 10-4. Absolutely.

And just do what

we tell you to do...

and only what we

tell you to do.

- Is that okay?

- No problem with that.

Shh.

Is that his tech guy,

camera guy?

What's the deal?

Lead investigator.

Cinematographer.

Wasting everybody's time.

Don't do that.

- It's beautiful, isn't it?

- Oh, jeez.

Sorry.

You have to be careful

in a house like this.

Uh, yeah.

There is so much pain

surrounding us.

How was the drive?

It was fine.

Good.

Uh, I have your contract

in the van, by the way.

If you want me to get it,

I can bring it in.

- We can sign it now or later.

- Whatever you like.

Okay.

This is a very special house.

There's just...

There's just so much pain

and pleasure,

it's overwhelming.

Listen... Heather, is it?

Uh, let's wait for the cameras

to start rolling.

We'll get some interviews

and some close-ups of you

walking around the house.

You don't have to convince me

of anything, honey.

You got the part, trust me.

So you don't believe.

No offense.

I mean, really,

I just, uh...

I've been on the show

for four years.

I've been to over 50

haunted houses,

and the scariest thing

I've seen is a girl

that tried to pick up Greg

in a bar in Tuscaloosa.

I mean, you can definitely

walk the walk,

and you've got a great look.

So...

You know, I'm glad you're here.

Welcome.

You will be convinced.

Well, don't convince me of that.

Convince the fans.

Yo, man. 5:
30.

Yes. Yes.

Hey! Pizza!

Call it out!

Anchovies

and a two-liter cola!

Piece of frickin' crap house!

What did you do, man?

Is somebody messing with me?

Where's the camera?

It's in the wall.

Get the hell out of here, man.

Go take care of your hand.

Yes, sir.

Guys!

Dude, there's something

not right about this house.

What do you mean?

There's ectoplasm in the wall.

Excellent. Bag it.

We'll do a segment on slime

and other spiritual excretions.

Where did the slime come from?

The bank Realtor, most likely.

Let me see it.

How did this happen?

Bub dropped it in the wall.

In the wall?

That's a strange place

to plant slime.

- It's yellow.

- Yeah. Like mucus.

The stuff we see is green, man.

It's never this yellow.

It looks like snot.

Look at it.

- You want to show it to the psychic?

- Yes, I do.

As soon as I get the lighting

set up for the other scene.

Where do you want

to do this, anyway, man?

Oh, in front of the old fireplace.

Classic.

It smells old.

- What you got there?

- Snot-cam.

What?

You take a look at it,

then you tell me what it is.

And by the way, we're gonna do

the psychic interview...

Right in front of the fireplace.

Spookier.

Yeah, classic.

I got it.

Hey, Greg, tell me this, man.

How many people did they say

actually got killed here?

Over 200 years, nine dozen.

Prostitutes, slaves,

um, visitors.

Till that kid that got lost here

in the 1950s, nothing.

It does feel different here.

What do you mean?

It just feels

like we're being watched.

How's the feed?

Chucky's on fire, man.

Where's Bub?

Bub!

Bub!

He cut his hand.

I told him to go clean it up.

What, did he leave?

He couldn't have, man.

I've been here the whole time.

Now, that's interesting.

We have ourselves

a little mystery here, fellows.

Let's use it.

Yeah.

Boom, gone.

This is great.

This is just great.

What?

We need to go up.

No. We'll send Chucky up first.

Give me a wider angle.

Yeah.

Bub?

We've been in the house

for about 92 minutes now,

and already some very strange things

have started happening.

First, we arrived in the kitchen

to find a refrigerator

full of fresh food,

uh, indicating that

there might be a presence here

that was expecting us.

Physical? Nonphysical?

We're not sure.

But we're about to find out.

It's about to get real, folks.

One of our team members

has gone missing.

This house has proven

to be full of surprises here.

Uh, we've never seen

anything like it.

How was that?

- Good.

- Good.

We're getting

a strong reading right here.

Whoa!

Greg.

Hey, we're getting

the good stuff.

- What? What's the reading?

- It's off the charts.

Did you see anything?

This kid's playing one smooth trick.

Right there.

Back that up.

All right. Tighter.

All the way.

Okay, now, can you

crop that right there?

There.

Are you okay?

The presence in this house

is malevolent. We should go.

That's great.

Let's get another take of that.

Yeah. Oh, yeah!

I love this house!

We're having a killer show here.

Somebody help me!

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