How the Grinch Stole Christmas Page #4

Yeah? Mine are homemade too.

Okay.

Put it in. Bring it on!

Is that all you got?

Is that all you got? Come on.

Out of the way, slow-mo!

Excuse me.

He's number one in the sack race run!

Number one! I'm number one!

I'm number one!

No child can beat the Grinch!

I beat you.

He won!

And now it's time for the moment we've all been waiting for.

Yes! My award.

Write the check.

There's no check.

Are you sure? Because I thought I heard someone mention a check.

I said, there's no check. And now it's time for Present Pass-it-on!

As always, we start with our Cheer-meister.

The gift of a Christmas shave.

Look at that hack job!

Yes, yes, yes. Good times!

Good times.

And now, I have a little something for the love of my life.

Martha May please become Mrs. Augustus May-Who.

Augustus.... If you agree to be my wife along with a lifetime supply of happiness, you'll also receive this: It's a new car!

Generously provided by the taxpayers of Whoville!

What do you say, Martha?

You got 20 seconds on the clock.

I....

These gifts are quite dazzling.

Of course they are.

That's what it's all about, isn't it?

That's what it's always been about!

Gifts!

Gifts.

Gifts, gifts, gifts.

You want to know what happens to your gifts?

They all come to me. In your garbage.

You see what I'm saying?

In your garbage!

I could hang myself with all the bad Christmas neckties I found at the dump!

And the avarice.

The avarice never ends!

"I want golf clubs." "I want diamonds." "I want a pony, so I can ride it twice, get bored, and sell it to make glue."

Look, I don't want to make waves, but this whole Christmas season is stupid, stupid, stupid!

There is, however one teeny-tiny Christmas tradition I find quite meaningful.

Mistletoe.

Now, pucker up and kiss it, Whoville!

Somebody's fabulous!

All right, your turn! Go on!

Let's go!

No!

Excuse me, old-timer.

Mind if I wet my whistle?

That's my good stuff!

Burn, baby! Burn!

The Whomanity!

Let's go! Come on!

No, wait!

Do something.

Right!

Calling all units. Calling all units.

Taxi!

It's because I'm green, isn't it?

Halt!

Evening, folks. Mind if I ride along?

You might want to scooch over.

You did the right thing.

Out of the way!

That's gonna hurt in the morning.

It's gonna blow!

You fellas all right?

How about a nice hat?

Lou?

I'm hurt, Lou.

I'm hurt, and I don't hurt easily.

But you and your family....

I'm so disappointed.

Can we just get back to Christmas the way it should be?

Grinch-less?

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

I just wanted everybody to be together for Christmas.

I quite enjoyed that.

I hope I get another invite soon.

Come on, come on!

Good thing we have a spare.

Suffering snorkelblatz!

They're relentless!

Only four hours till Christmas!

Narrator:
Yes the Grinch knew tomorrow all the Who girls and boys would wake bright and early and rush for their toys. Grinch: And then, oh the noise! Oh the noise, noise, noise noise!

They'll bang on tong-tinglers They'll blow their floo-flounders. They'll crash on jang-jinglers and bounce on boing-bounders.

Narrator:
Then Whos young and old would sit down to a feast. and they'll feast, and they'll feast. Grinch: And they'll feast feast feast feast!

They'll eat their Who-pudding and rare Who roast beast! And that's something I just Can not stand in the least.

Oh, no. I'm speaking in rhyme!

Blast you Whos!

Narrator:
And the more the Grinch thought of what Christmas would bring, the more the Grinch thought Grinch: I must stop this whole thing.

Why for year after year I've put up with it now. I must stop this Christmas from coming - But how?

I mean, in what way?

"Christmas is goin' to the dogs "We're scoffing down the turkey and the grog "Things are looking very good, it's true"

Are you having a holly, jolly Christmas?

Wrong-o!

If you're not going to help me then you might as well....

Narrator:
Then he got an idea. An awful idea. The Grinch got a wonderful, Awful idea.

Grinch:
I know just what to do. (Grinch getting a Santa costume) Narrator: The Grinch laughed in his throat. And he made a quick Santy Claus hat and coat.

And he chuckled and clucked At this great Grinchy trick. Grinch: With this coat and this hat, I'll look just like St. Nick.

♪ You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch ♪ ♪ You really are a heel ♪ ♪ You're as cuddly as a cactus and as charming as an eel ♪ ♪ Mr. Grinch ♪ ♪ You're a bad banana ♪ ♪ With a greasy black peel ♪ Just face the music. ♪ You're a monster, Mr. Grinch, yes, you are ♪ ♪ Your heart's an empty hole ♪ ♪ Your brain is full of spiders You got garlic in your soul ♪ ♪ Mr. Grinch ♪ ♪ I wouldn't touch you with a ♪ ♪ thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole ♪

I asked for three-quarters, not five-eighths.

Stay focused!

♪ You know, if you asked the who's who of Whoville ♪ ♪ No one would deny it ♪

Air bag is a little slow.

But that's what these tests are for!

♪ You're a vile one ♪ ♪ Mr. Grinch ♪ ♪ You have termites in your smile ♪ ♪ You have all the tender sweetness Of a seasick crocodile ♪ ♪ Mr. Grinch ♪ ♪ Given the choice between you ♪ ♪ I'd take the seasick crocodile ♪

Fat boy should be finishing up anytime now.

Talk about a recluse.

He only comes out once a year, and he never catches any flak for it!

Probably lives up there to avoid the taxes.

Merry Christmas!

Oopsie.

Grinch:
Forgot about the reindeer! Narrator: Did that stop the old Grinch? No.

The Grinch simply said: If I can't find a reindeer I'll make one instead.

Oh, Max!

So he called his dog Max Grinch: MAX!!!! And he took some red thread, And tied a big horn On top of his head.

All right.

You're a reindeer. Here's your motivation.

You're Rudolph, a freak with a red nose, nobody likes you.

Then one day, Santa picks you and you save Christmas.

No, forget that part. We'll improvise.

Just keep it kind of loosey-goosey.

You hate Christmas! You're gonna steal it!

Saving Christmas was a lousy ending. Way too commercial.

Action!

Brilliant!

You reject your own nose because it represents the glitter of commercialism!

Why didn't I think of that?

Cut, print, check the gate. Moving on.

That feels good.

Here goes nothin', hot dog!

Wow!

This is nuts!

On, Crasher! On, Thrasher!

On, Vomit and Blitzkrieg!

We're gonna die!

We're gonna die!

I'm going to throw up, and then I'm gonna die!

Mommy, tell it to stop!

Almost lost my cool there.

All their windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air. All the Whos were all dreaming sweet dreams without care When he came to the first little house on the square...

Welcome to Whoville, Max.

Betty?

Betty?

What?

Did you hear something?

It's Santa!

Go right back to sleep.

Grinch:
Come on Max, this is our first stop Narrator: The old Grinchy Claus hissed. And he climbed to the roof, empty bags in his fist.

He'd slide down the chimney, a rather tight pinch, But if Santa could do it, then so could the Grinch.

Grinch:
He's planning a double-twisting interrupted forward-flying 2-and-a-half with a combo tuck and pike. High degree of difficulty.

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