I Am Not a Hipster Page #3

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but remix one of your songs,

add some kind of dance track

to it, some beats, some, like...

Ooh

Like...

(Beat boxing)

Just for fun, just to,

you know, f*** around.

Yeah, definitely.

I think my sh*t would sound

really cool with a techno beat,

some Auto-Tune.

Okay, umm, yeah, you know,

just thought it'd sound

like a good time.

I like techno beats.

This guy likes techno beats.

- I'm going to...

- See you in there.

Yeah, cool,

good meeting you guys.

Yeah, thanks.

Okay, I'm going to

go inside too.

Why are you being a dick?

Why the f*** are you bringing

him to my friend's house?

Grow up, Brook.

It's been a year.

I'm not going to

stop hanging out

with all my friends

because you feel uncomfortable.

What do you think about

all this trivial sh*t?

(Laughing)

Hey, guys, where's Sabrina?

Oh, thanks, John, love to.

So, this is just a standard

that... 6/8 in "A",

just repeats the one,

three, two and five.

And the chorus is "D", "A", "E",

but in, umm,

you know, half bars.

It goes to the "C" minor,

short minor,

before it goes to the "E"

the second time around,

builds through the chorus.

Do whatever the hell you want,

I don't care,

whatever feels right. One, two,

three. One, two, three.

This is a waltz

if anybody feels like dancing.

(Sighing)

That you like it

When the plotline

and meaning are easy

To understand

Seems so perfect

No questions, no loose ends,

no restless nerves

So, explain and explain it

How it's all for the best

No regrets

And we concur

Some intend to forget

That you dug out all I had

And you left me in the dirt

And you always

Started this sh*t about

Our hungry hearts

But I've only been thirsty

A bottomless pit

Since we've been apart

All right.

(Clapping)

There he is. What's up?

This is my friend Taylor

from Seattle,

the one I was telling you about.

She's a big fan.

Hey.

(WHISPERING):

She's Japanese.

Okay.

The last album made me breakup

with my boyfriend.

Oh. Sorry about that.

It's okay. He was a douchebag.

Uhh, okay.

Is that your real hair colour?

Uhh, yeah.

Thought so.

How far do you live from here?

Did you have any relatives

that got hit by that tsunami?

I'm Chinese.

Oh.

Would you sing to me?

No.

Come on.

If you sing to me,

I'll show you my secret talent.

What's that?

(Whispering)

Black is the colour

Of my true love's hair

(Muffled singing)

No, one of your songs.

No, no, no.

That wasn't part of the deal.

But that's what I meant.

You really upset right now?

You are so f***ing cute.

Mmm. Mmm, mmm. Oh my God.

God, you have a huge tongue.

Thank you.

No, I mean, it fills my whole

mouth up. I can't breathe.

And you don't like that?

I don't know.

Can we just, uhh...

Can we just take a break

for a minute?

Okay.

(Sighing)

Have you heard

the new Spaceface album?

You guys are friends, right?

You're f***ing with me, right?

What?

(Sighing)

What's this move?

(Groaning)

(Laughing)

What are you...

(Laughing)

Are you hungry?

(Crickets chirping)

(Knocking)

WOMAN:

Does that thing ring?

WOMAN 2:

I don't know if I should.

WOMAN:

It's not a doorbell.

(Knocking)

Maybe he went to the store.

(Knocking)

Check to see if it's open.

It's unlocked.

Brook?

Brook?

(Whistling)

Shh.

Go, go, go, go, go.

Okay, wait, wait.

Ready? Two, three.

(Screaming)

Oh my... Ha ha!

(Blowing raspberry)

Good morning.

Why the hell are you guys

in my room right now?

You forgot?

We left you, like, 20 messages.

Really?

I think more than that.

Ow.

It's good to see you too, Bro.

I'm just a little...

Hungover?

It's good to see you guys.

(Grunting)

Me too.

I want to smell him.

Oh, wait a minute.

You have to go take a shower.

I can smell your feet

from up here.

What?

Eww!

Seriously!

It's gross.

You're right.

Go, go, go.

Still drunk.

He doesn't look good.

That's a pretty good choice

for a country girl.

(SOUTHERN DRAWL):

Well, thank you kindly.

Spring, the onions

are going to burn.

Wow, you guys clean fast.

Nice pants.

How'd you get into them?

They look like they'd fit Mez.

I think they're cute.

You guys are dumb.

Okay, who wants eggs?

I do.

Don't put so many mushrooms

in mine.

This isn't yours.

This is for Brook. He's oldest.

Oh, that smells so good.

But I don't eat meat.

Oh, they're not meat.

They're chicken period.

Eww. Joy, that's gross.

What? It's true.

I'm just going to have

some orange juice.

But you love my omelettes.

Yeah, I do. But I'm vegan.

Oh, okay, no, you're not.

Well, believe what you want.

Hey.

What are you doing?

Organizing all of our photos

of Mom.

Oh my gosh,

look how cute you are.

(Chuckling)

So cute.

Why are you doing this now?

'Cause Joy said I had to.

Hey, Mez,

how do you want your period?

Uhh, runny, please.

That's disgusting.

You're disgusting.

Hey, Mez. Why are you guys here?

We're here to spread

Mom's ashes.

Do you not check any of

the emails that I send you?

Dad's all right with that?

Yeah, it was his idea.

Really?

- You know, you still do that?

- What?

You always look to Mez

to see if I'm telling the truth.

No, I don't.

Okay.

I'm going to take this plate

out to Dad then.

What?

What's she talking about?

Oh, Dad's here.

What do you mean, "Dad's here"?

Check your messages.

He's outside in the car.

He said he's not coming up

until you invite him.

Is she serious?

He's just being stubborn.

Let's go out and talk to him.

I'll go with you.

Yeah, me too.

Brook?

(Door slamming)

I read the advice

in your letter

To see myself

without a filter

So, tonight,

I have locked all my doors

I'm down on all fours

Wild again

The dawn light is

slowly approaching

Eyes open to

slow down the spinning

I bet you'd be

proud of me now

Lost in my own house

Can't find a way out

Oh

Ah

Ah!

(Panting)

Shame only came on display

To the others,

but I was wrong

(Water running)

Hey.

Is Dad coming in?

(Toilet flushing)

He says he's going to

sleep in the car.

We might go to that motel.

Does Brook have any floss?

Good luck.

Oh, look.

Oh, he does love us.

(Knocking)

Brook, can we sleep in your bed?

Sure.

Great. I get the end.

No, Joy, I always have to

sleep in the middle.

Oh, well, it's too bad.

That's not even true.

I like the middle.

What?

My God!

(Laughing)

Get off me.

Shh. I'm trying to sleep.

This sort of feels kind of nice.

Shh.

Are you ready for bed?

(Groaning)

Yeah. I got to brush my teeth.

Okay. Go brush your teeth.

(Water running)

So, he's just going to

sleep out there?

You going to invite him in?

I'm not going to play

his f***ing game.

He's probably going to

sleep out there.

Brook?

(Spitting)

(Water running)

(Dog barking)

(Birds chirping)

What are you doing?

Got to go to work.

You're subbing?

Is it that same school?

Yeah.

Car's gone.

He probably went to the motel.

I'll call him.

All right, I get off at 1:30.

Okay, bye.

"Gregory and Jeremy

walked and walked and walked

"down the street

until it began to get dark

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