In The French Style Page #6

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I never let anything stand in my way.

Not fear, or weariness, or possessions,

or love.

It's my life.

It's what I live by.

It's my value.

If I changed, I'd be a

different man, a worse man.

Finally, I'd dislike myself.

Finally, you'd dislike me.

Would I?

Maybe.

Another thing. What?

I won't pretend I live like a monk

when I go on trips like this.

I have been known to go out with various ladies

from time to time in various parts of the world.

You didn't have to tell me that.

Why not?

Because I knew it.

Because everybody knows it.

Because everybody's told me.

I see. Okay, subject closed.

I won't be gone too long.

Two months, maybe three.

Give me a ring when you come back.

(WOMAN ANNOUNCING ON PA) First minute.

Be happy, baby. Have fun.

Go to all the parties.

That's me, baby. That's you.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

(KNOCKING CONTINUES)

Ding dong merrily on high

In heaven the bells are ringing

Ding dong verily the sky

is full of angels singing

(SINGS LOUDLY)

Bill, you idiot. Come in, before

the management calls the police.

Hosanna in excelsis

Greetings of the season from the

American community in Paris,

from the English community in Paris,

from the Italian community in Paris,

from the Parisian community in Paris.

Enough, I get the idea.

Hello.

Pals worry, you know, when a girl

suddenly drops out of circulation.

Do they? I'm sorry.

What's this not answering

the telephone bit?

I didn't want to talk to anyone.

Why not?

Private reasons.

I've been thinking out my life.

A girl ought to think out her life

once every 23 years, don't you agree?

Couldn't a chum help?

Not this time.

Okay. The hermit season is officially over.

From now on, you're going to be

permitted to be alone in this room

for one reason only, and that's sleep.

What's all this?

I'm arranging your schedule

for the next two months.

Dinner at the Anglo-American Press

Club to meet the new Ambassador.

Tickets for the Bolshoi Ballet. Tickets

for the opening of the new lonesco play.

Tickets for the fight next Monday night.

There's a Hungarian middleweight

there who hits like a mule.

Invitation to dinner at the home

of the Baroness de Rothschild.

A contract for five days'

modeling for Elle.

Invitation to lunch at the British Embassy.

A piano recital by Arthur Rubinstein.

Opening of the new Brigitte Bardot flick,

preview of the spring collection.

I see what you mean.

Self-pity is now unfashionable.

Melancholy is strictly verboten

There are 10,000 things to do in Paris, and

you're gonna do every one of them. Understood?

Understood.

And the first thing you're gonna do is get the hell

out of this room and come and have dinner with me.

Tell me where you'll be and I'll

try to join... Nothing doing!

You're coming with me right now!

I have to change and put on a face.

Dress tomorrow, make up your face on

New Year's Day. Come on, out you go.

(SIGHS) Out I go, Billy boy.

Come on! Out, out, out, out, out! (SHOUTS)

(JAZZ PLAYING ON RECORD)

(TELEPHONE RINGS)

Oui.

(CHUCKLES) Still the same.

You still answer the phone as

though expecting each call

to be an invitation to a party.

Who's this?

The voice of Egypt.

Walter!

When did you get in?

This minute.

I'm at the airport. Where are

we gonna meet for lunch?

Walter, I'm in despair. You have a date?

Yes. When are you going to learn to cable?

That's okay. We'll make it later.

How about a drink this afternoon?

Well, we could start with that.

Five o'clock?

Make it 5:
30. Where are you going to be?

Up around L'toile.

Alexander's? Good.

Will you be on time, for once?

Be more polite the first

day a man comes into town.

(LAUGHS)

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

What did you say, ma'am?

All the kids are speaking French this year.

Isn't it nice to have you back in town.

Welcome.

In the French style.

Well, now, here's the man again.

The spirit of Paris. American division.

(CHUCKLES)

What'll it be to drink? Garon?

Tea, please.

Tea? Anything wrong?

No, I just want tea.

That's a hell of a drink to

welcome a traveler home with.

With lemon, please. (SPEAKING FRENCH)

How was Egypt?

Was I in Egypt?

That's what it said in the papers.

Oh, yeah.

A new world struggling to be born.

Too late for feudalism,

too early for democracy.

Fancy talk for your column.

I mean, over a drink. How was Egypt?

Oh, sunny and sad.

After two weeks in Cairo, you

feel sorry for everybody.

How's Paris?

Too late for democracy,

too early for feudalism.

(LAUGHS)

I mean, over a kiss, how's Paris?

The same, almost the same.

Your hair, what happened?

You noticed.

Where are the blondes of yesteryear?

I decided to go natural. People

say it makes me look younger.

Oh, they're absolutely right.

You now look exactly 11.

To those who return.

I never used to accept toasts in tea.

You're a finicky, liquor loving man.

Now, the evening.

I thought we might skip our dear friends and

go to that place in the markets for dinner,

because I'm dying for a steak.

And after that, I...

What's the matter? Can't

we have dinner tonight?

It's not that, exactly.

I have a date.

Cancel him.

I can't, really.

He's coming to pick me

up here any minute now.

Oh, that makes it different, doesn't it?

Well, can't we shake him?

No, we can't shake him.

Oh, the man doesn't live

who can't be shaken.

"Old friend," you say, "just arrived

from the horrors of the desert.

"Just escaped dysentery and religious

wars by the skin of his teeth.

"Needs soothing and tender attention

for his shattered nerves," etcetera.

Sorry, can't be done.

Why not?

Are you pleading?

Maybe I am.

I thought you never pleaded.

And neither did I, because

we're both gentlemen.

Didn't we agree on that?

Forget what we agreed on.

Why can't we shake him?

Because I don't want to.

The wind's in that direction.

Variably in that direction.

We could all have dinner

together, the three of us.

He's a very nice man. You'd like him.

I never like any man the

first night I'm in Paris.

Three months is a long time, isn't it,

in Paris?

It isn't a long time, in

Paris or anywhere else.

MAN:
Hello, Christina.

I found the place all right.

Jack, this is Walter Beddoes.

John Haislip. Doctor Haislip.

How do you do?

Doctor? What kind of doctor?

He's a surgeon.

He's very famous in medical circles.

That's right, Chris. Impress the public.

He's also in research.

Really?

He's an explorer, like Columbus.

Only instead of a ship, he uses a knife.

What have you discovered recently, doctor?

That the human head is approximately round

and contains some very

rich and happy continents.

What'll it be to drink, Doctor?

Oh, a lemonade, please.

(SPEAKS FRENCH)

Jack doesn't drink.

He says it isn't fair for

people who make a living

out of cutting other people up.

But when I retire, I'm going to soak it up and

let my hands shake like leaves in the wind.

Did you have a good time in Egypt?

I swore a solemn oath I'd forget Egypt

for a month once I got back here.

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