In the Navy Page #3

And to tell her

I had eyes of blue?

You know I ain't got

eyes of blue. I know that.

And you told me to tell her

that I'm an admiral.

All I am is a baker.

Oh, do I have trouble.

There's no harm done.

You not only wrecked my whole life,

but you spoiled my whole day.

Shame on you!

You hit me.

Shame on me too.

You hit me!

Smokey, I must be

losing my mind.

I didn't mean to hit you,

Smokey.

Smokey,

please believe me.

I'd never lay my hands on you.

You know that.

Smokey, hit me right

in the face. Go ahead.

Lot of good that will do.

Make up for that, Smokey.

Hit me right in the face

and make me happy.

Go ahead, Smokey.

Hit me right there.

And I had to coax him to do it.

Attention.!

Ha, ha, ha.

Flotsam and Jetsam.

We sure did fool you.

Oh, lookie, doughnuts!

Kids, get away

from those doughnuts.

It's okay. They're the

commanding officer's nephews.

Hey, Dizzy, come here.

Where's that coat

I had made for shore leave?

The white one.

In the clothes closet.

Get it for me.

Let's see it.

It's a pip. Steal it

over here. Hey, Smokey!

There you are, Joe. It's all fixed. Thanks.

How do you like the coat? That's

swell. You look like a battle wagon.

I'm gonna enjoy myself because

I got plenty of money to do it.

Hey! I'm going to spend

every dime on Patty.

Where'd you get all that?

I didn't know you had all that money. Sure.

Why didn't you

tell a fellow?

You got a certain look in your eye I

don't like. Behave. I'm your friend.

What're you doing? A little game

called "find the submarine. "

Like to play games?

That's a submarine.

That's a lemon.

We call it a submarine.

That's the Atlantic Ocean, that's the

Pacific Ocean, and that's the Indian Ocean.

I place it in one

of the oceans...

and if you find

the submarine, you win.

Let's play.

Get your money out.

You get the idea of the game.

Now, watch it.

See it there?

We put it in the Pacific Ocean.

Keep your eye on it. Tell me

where it is. I'll take this one.

How much?

Ten dollars.

It wasn't there?

I swear it was.

It wasn't there. I can't

help it. It got away... fast.

They do that.

You see it there?

How can you go wrong?

Just a twist of the wrist.

Where she goes, no one

knows. This one, for $10.

Ten more, 10 more,

10 more, 10 more.

Put it down once.

Where is it?

No, it wasn't there and it wasn't there.

Don't see how anybody can win this game.

I wouldn't say that.

I just said it.

I'll bet you $10

that it can be found.

There it is. If I can find it,

why can't you?

What kind of bet is that? I bet

you $10. You pick it up yourself.

That's not good. I'll give

you a chance to get even.

I'll bet you one dollar. Now you

find it. That's on the other side.

You win.

So it's even.

What you start betting dollars for?

We've been betting tens.

I'll give you a chance to double

up on me. You see it there?

Watch it. It's under

one of those shells.

Ten dollars. It's under here.

Go ahead and find it.

If he can find it, why can't you?

You wanna make a little bet?

Ten dollars. Under here.

Pick it out. It's up to you.

If he wins...

I'll take a chance.

Ten dollars. Go ahead,

pick it out. Where is it?

Why don't you leave 'em alone? Pick it out.

There it is. No, it's here. It's here.

There it is. The first

time I ever won in my life.

What do you win?

You had no money down.

If you had some money down,

you'd have won.

Hey, Smokey, I bet I could

win that submarine game.

Okay. How much you wanna bet? Five bucks.

Have you got a ten-dollar bill

for some ones?

I always carry a ten-dollar

bill. That's fine.

Give me the ones.

There's one, two...

How many years have you

been in the navy? Six years.

What's that got to do

with counting my change?

Six? Seven, eight, nine,

10. That's much better.

Here's your five.

One, two, three, four, five.

The idea of this game is to find... Smokey.

Wait a minute. What?

Come here.

There's somethin' wrong.

You didn't give 10 ones that time.

Here's your 10. Give me back

my ones. Why cheat me? Your pal.

That's better.

Okay. Come on.

There's one, two,

three, four, five...

Wait. When do you get out

of the navy? In two years.

Two? Two years I get out. Two.

Three, four, five, six, seven...

Wait a minute.

Did I understand you to say

six? Six years in the navy!

That's what it was.

Two years I'm getting out.

I had that six on my mind. It's

two years. Don't get me mixed up.

Two. Two. Two.

Two, two.

Okay, two. Three, four, five,

six, seven, eight, nine, 10.

Thanks.

That's all.

Got it again.

Dizzy, have you got

a 10 for some ones?

Sure.

Give me the 10.

There's one, two...

How long you been in the navy?

Ninety days.

Come on, count it out.

No, you come on.

How long you been in the navy? Ninety days!

It's not gonna come out. Something's

wrong. You got yourself into it.

Come on, count it off.

I'm gonna get it again.

Two, three, four,

five, six, seven...

Seven.

How many months in 90 days? Three months.

Three months? Three.

Three months. Three!

I got him.

Three, four, five, six,

seven, eight, nine, 10.

Yeah.

I think I got it again.

Oh, come on.

GiveJoe a chance to win

some money, will you, please?

Look, Joe. You see it there?

How can you go wrong?

It's just a little twist

of the wrist.

That's all there is to it.

It's underneath one of those shells.

Dizzy, take a look

under the table.

Under the table. You're

a cheater. No remarks.

Guy's got a fruit stand

under the table. Keep quiet.

Where's the submarine? No,

it wasn't there. It's a gyp!

It's a gyp, I tell ya.

Now, just a minute.

All right, there's your money

back. Cheatin' his old friend!

Smokey, don't go no further.

I want to play some more.

You wanna play some more?

You ain't gonna cheat me.

- You got any more money?

- Certainly. I got a bankroll. What odds you're gonna give me?

I'll give you two-to-one odds.

It ain't enough.

I'll give you three-to-one.

No. Too anxious.

What do you want?

At least six.

I'll give you five-to-one.

No, six.

I'll give you six-to-one.

Okay.

What was that? I don't know.

Somebody's digging clams or something.

I'll tell you what we'll do.

You know where it is now? Yes.

For the bankroll.

The bankroll.

Put it all down. Pick it up. Where'd

that come from? You're not mad?

Certainly I'm mad.

Then suck the lemons.

The worst thing I ever saw,

cheatin' like that.

Can you imagine a man doing that to

me? One thing I never do is cheat.

You know where

the submarine is.

I know where a flock of

submarines are. For how much?

I know where a submarine with juice

coming out of it is. For how much?

For the bankroll.

You wanna bet it all?

The whole works. All right.

You're only entitled to one ocean.

You pick up the ocean.

I'll pick up this ocean.

You want that ocean there? Pick it up.

You've got to pick it up in order to win.

Find the submarine.

What ocean do you want?

Is it under there?

There is a triple-barrelled...

Hey, Dizzy. Hey, Joe,

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