In Which We Serve

This is the story of a ship

(Cheering)

(Bosun's whistle)

Ship's company...'shun!

Turn aft, right and left.

Turn!

- Open fire!

- Open fire!

Shoot!

Look at the Huns, sir. They're jumping

overboard in full marching order.

Look at that. Come in, the water's lovely!

Look at'em. Somebody must have

blown a whistle. Layer on.

There are a lot more caques to port, sir,

and some bigger transports.

Shift to the big transports.

Aye aye, sir. Check, check, check.

Shift target right. Follow TBI.

(Explosion)

Can I fire torpedoes at the transports?

All right, get your old mouldies off,

but not more than two at any transport.

Flags, make to the division.

Train tubes to port.

- Ready port.

- Main office, make Tommy Tommy port.

(Explosion)

That's got'em!

- Shoot when you see the whites of their eyes.

- 0-3-5. 1-0 left

Bingo!

- Fire one!

- Fire one!

- Fire two!

- Fire two!

Torpedoes fired, sir.

Our fish have hit, sir,

and one transport has blown up.

There goes another.

Big stuff.

The rest of the division are doing well.

Must be an enemy destroyer, sir.

- Right, engage her.

- Aye aye, sir.

Check check check.

Shift target left Follow TBI.

Take this. It was my mother's.

Ah!

- Trainer on.

- Layer on.

- Left gun ready.

- Right gun ready.

0-4-0. 1-0 left.

I'll lay you 10-1 they're all Germans.

You'd never get the Macaronis to tackle

a job like that, not for love nor money.

The Eyeties will do anything for money.

Anything but fight.

That's why they were so lousy in the last war.

That's on account of their warm,

languorous southern temperament.

- Cocoa, sir.

- Thanks, Snotty.

Thank you.

Here comes the dawn of a new day, Flags.

It could be an uncomfortable one.

Yes, sir. It's a very pretty sky, sir.

Somebody sent me a calendar rather like that.

- Did it have a squadron of Dorniers on it?

- No, sir.

- That's where art parts company with reality.

- You're right, sir.

- Cigarette?

- Thanks.

Aircraft in sight astern, sir.

Angle of sight 2-0.

Looks like a couple of squadrons

of Junkers 88's.

- Starboard 20.

- Aye aye, sir. Starboard 20.

- One blast on the siren.

- Aye aye, sir.

(Siren)

Aircraft in sight, bearing green 1-7-0.

Angle of sight 2-0.

Short-range weapons. Aircraft in sight.

Stand by for dive bombers.

Open fire!

Shoot.

The first wave are diving now.

Hard a-port.

- Sound two blasts.

- Aye aye, sir.

All guns, sector independent.

Down, ovo rybody

Hard a-starboard.

We got one. Try and get two next time.

Bravo! Bravo! Bravo!

All guns shift to the next wave. Red 1-4-0.

Short-range weapons.

Shift to the next wave. Bearing red 1-4-0.

- Hard a-starboard.

- Hard a-starboard.

- Sound one blast.

- Aye aye, sir.

(Gunfire)

We've winged that one.

Down, ovo rybody!

Midships.

Aye aye, sir. Midships.

There's another wave on the port side, sir.

(Explosion)

- Hard a-starboard.

- Hard a-starboard, sir.

(Rapid gunfire)

The leader of this wave

is coming much lower, sir.

He'll probably hit our mast.

Well done.

We've got him, but I'm afraid he's got us too.

Midships.

Midships, sir.

- Carry on firing. Here comes the next wave.

- All guns are still in action.

Stop both.

No answer from the engine room, sir.

The telegraphs must be shot away.

I'm afraid we're going over.

Pass the word to cast loose the Carley floats.

(Gunfire and explosions)

Abandon ship!

(Echoing)

I'll sign for her now i'll sign for her now.

I'll sign for her now i'll sign for her now.

- Has Satterthwaite been sighted?

- No, sir, but it's just on ten o'clock.

(Banging)

Stop that hammering, Edgecombe.

I can't hear myself think.

Aye aye. sir

Tell No.1 to fall in the hands

on the quarterdeck.

Shall we have it on the desk or the shelf, sir?

Shelf. We'll have the usual one on the desk.

- Wedding dress, sir?

- Yes.

- It's here, sir.

- Good. Give it to me.

- Mr Satterthwaite's coming on board, sir.

- Is No.1 bringing him down? Hands all aft?

(Knock at door)

Mr Satterthwaite, sir.

- Good morning.

- Good morning.

- Everything in order?

- Certainly.

We'd better get this little ceremony over.

- Were you satisfied with the trial?

- Yes, she's a well-found ship.

We'll be hoisting the ensign

in a couple of minutes, Edgecombe.

- Now, then.

- Are you prepared to take over the ship, sir?

Yes, I'll sign for her now.

Watch your head, sir.

Watch your head, sir.

Watch your head, sir.

(Klaxon)

- You can smoke if you like.

- Thank you, sir.

- Will you have one, sir?

- No, thanks, not at the moment.

- Heard from your missus?

- I had a letter last week.

- One of the usuals, full of complaints.

- What's wrong?

Her mother was took bad

and had to go to hospital.

That old woman's always in trouble.

I think she enjoys it.

What's the matter with her?

Last time it was her back,

this time it's her stomach.

It seems she can't keep anything down.

It's not for want of trying.

- You'll be glad to be going to sea.

- To put it mildly, sir!

- Darling! I thought you were never coming.

- Everything under control?

Far from it. We've been in an uproar all day

since your telegram came.

Daddy!

Hello, Bobby.

- We've been waiting for hours.

- Mummy wanted us to go to bed.

- We saw the ship, Daddy.

- We took our tea on the cliffs and saw it go by.

- Not "it", Lavvy. Her.

- That's right.

She looked beautiful, Teddy.

How fast was she going? Was it 40 knots?

Good heavens, no. She was only doing 20.

- But she can do more than that, can't she?

- You bet she can.

Take the car round.

Then give Ellen a hand with dinner.

- Good evening, Edgecombe.

- Evening ma'am.

I hope it's a good dinner. I'm starving.

- Can I tell him what it is, Mummy?

- It's a surprise. She mustn't spoil it.

- Bobby, keep still. How long have you got?

- Till the morning.

Can we come to the dockyard?

No, son. We're commissioning,

making a rush job of it.

- But Mummy promised...

- That's enough. You heard Daddy.

But we shall be able to come on board

before you go, shan't we?

- Well, we'll make time somehow.

- When, Daddy? When?

Bobby, don't be so persistent.

Children, it's dreadfully late.

You really will have to go to bed.

Oh, Mummy.

Daddy will come up and say good night

if you're quick.

But I want to hear about the ship.

I'll tell you about it in the morning.

You can fire as many questions as you like.

Be good, do as your mother tells you,

and go to bed.

- Can I ask questions, too?

- You never do anything else.

Go on. Off you go, both of you.

- I'll be up in ten minutes. Promise.

- Promise?

- Are you coming up, too, Mummy?

- Yes.

Come on, Lavvy, I'll race you.

Wait. That's not fair!

They've been wild with excitement all day.

Darling, you must be exhausted.

I'll get you a drink.

Whisky and soda or a cocktail?

As it's a gala evening,

let's have a Kinross special.

I guessed it. It's all ready, only wants the ice.

I made a private bet

that you'd forget the Cointreau.

Wrong again.

I had a sort of feeling this was an occasion.

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