Iron Invader

---

Hey.

How's it looking there, bro?

Well, that depends.

Do you want the good news,

or the bad news?

There's good news?

No, actually that's

the bad news

No good news?

There's no good news.

Why do you got to ask me

that and get my hopes up?

Relax, it's just

a figure of speech.

So, how bad is bad?

Well, if my math is correct...

That is a big if.

Like I said if

my math is right,

we're about 3 grand

in the hole.

Holy cow!

I don't know how we're going

to buy the window casings

or the gutters.

What do you mean?

We don't have another grant

payment coming?

Not until we finish this room,

which we can't do without more

money to buy more supplies.

Just put it on

the credit card.

The credit card?

Ethan the credit card has

been maxed for weeks.

I say we cut our losses,

get out of this sink hole.

You're kidding me, right?

We're halfway done,

we can't stop now.

Not to mention the fact

that Mom and Dad

devoted their lives to this.

Get your head

out of your ass!

I thought that's why

we were doing this.

[sighs]

Holy cow.

It's not that bad,

it's not the end of the world.

I'm talking about that!

There's something falling

from the sky.

Wow.

[explosion]

What the...?

Better call the Sheriff!

What?

Aghhh!!!!!

There!

Cool.

[whistles]

This is awesome.

It's like a spaceship

or something.

It's not a spaceship.

Look at those weird symbols

on the wreckage.

It's Russian.

A Russian spaceship.

It's not a spaceship

you big dork.

Well, what is it?

I don't know, probably

a satellite.

How do you know?

I saw this thing on TV once.

Hundreds of them

floating up there

sometimes they stop working

and they crash to Earth.

Think Greg Oropolus knows?

No, looks like he slept

right through it.

Figures.

What do you reckon

we do with it?

I don't know, I guess we

should call the Space Agency

or the Feds or something.

Why?

So we can get full

body cavity searches?

Okay, well what do you want

to do with it?

Sell it.

Satellites are worth

a lot of money.

It's junk, Ethan.

Who's going to want

to buy junk?

(Both):
Earl.

I've got a tarp in the back

we can wrap it all up in.

[car engine starting]

What the heck is that?

Beats me.

Maybe it's one of those

giant gorilla things

you put on car wash roofs.

Would you take your car

to a place that had that

on the roof?

I guess not.

What's up guys?

Morning Max.

Can I get you some coffee

or something?

Yeah, coffee would be great,

thanks man.

Damn Earl, what the heck

you making?

Oh, that there, Ethan, is

what you call an Iron Golem.

An Iron what?

An Iron Golem, it's

from Jewish folklore.

Certain rabbis used to create

these giant servants

to protect the townsfolk.

You mean like a scarecrow?

I'm building it for

the town centennial.

Going to be a surprise.

Yeah, it's definitely

going to be that.

Beautiful, ain't it?

Oh, it's definitely unique.

Yeah.

Yup.

Definitely.

Unique.

So, what brings you boys

out yonder?

I've got something I want

to show you.

[chuckles]

[crows cawing]

[dog barking]

Well, what you got here?

A satellite.

It crash landed on Greg

Oropolis's place this morning.

It's Russian.

You don't say?

Old Greg Oropolis,

he don't want it?

Finders keepers.

[chuckles]

I'll give you 200.

I was thinking more

along the lines of 2000.

What are you, nuts?

It's just a pile

of scrap metal!

The heck it is, that's genuine

space debris, Earl.

Yeah, and there's

gold and silver

in some of that metal

too and you know it.

Okay, I'll give you 500.

Well, I tell you what.

It's only because

I like you boys

and that's the only reason.

I'll go to 800.

[Bell tolling]

Well don't look at me

like that.

I mean it's Russian space junk

not even made in America.

I could have gotten

him up to 1000

if you hadn't jumped in!

I would have covered

all the gutters.

Yeah, but whose idea was it

to sell it?

Spare me, Einstein.

Holy cow.

I didn't know she was back.

Neither did I.

You okay, bro?

You look like you just saw

a ghost.

Aren't you going

to go say hi?

What for?

What for?

Are you kidding me?

The love of your life just

walked by!

That was a long time ago,

Ethan.

Exactly, so why are you

still holding a grudge.

Go get the gutters, okay?

[radio music]

Max!

I need a refill!

Alright.

You're out of beer, Grandpa.

You want me to go into town

and get you some?

Do bears crap in the woods?

I'll take that

as a yes.

That boy.

[car engine running]

Lover boy.

Shut up, go.

Just get the gutters,

would ya.

Amanda.

Jake.

Hi.

So, when did you get

back into town?

A few days ago,

staying at my Aunt's.

I've been meaning

to call you.

Okay, sure.

Come on, of course I was

going to call you.

Just getting settled in.

And having a bit of culture

shock coming back to Redeemer.

I can imagine.

So, who is this lovely

young lady?

This is my daughter, Claire.

Hi, Claire.

I'm Jake.

Hi.

Hi.

I'm an old friend

of your moms.

What do you think of

our little town?

It's okay, I guess.

Takes a bit of getting

used to.

I bet it does, it must be a

really big change for you, huh?

Yeah, it's the smallest town

I've ever seen.

[Laughs]

Yeah, it might be but it's also

what makes it so special.

I'm going to go wait

in the car, Mom.

Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you too,

Claire.

Seems like a great kid.

She is.

And things are good for you?

You're still working as

a biology teacher, right?

I'm getting a divorce.

Wow, I'm sorry to hear that.

You guys seemed like

the perfect couple.

Well, we were at one time.

That must be pretty hard

for Claire I guess, huh?

She's hanging in there.

Mom, lets go!

You guys moving

back here then?

No, we're just staying

with my Aunt

until I can figure things out.

Right.

I think Claire would go crazy

if we stayed here.

You never know.

She may grow to like

it here.

Well, I should get going,

my Aunt's expecting us back.

Right, okay.

It's good to see you, Jake.

It's good to see you too,

Amanda.

Wait a sec, would you like

to maybe get dinner sometime?

I don't think so, Jake.

I think I really need to spend

some time alone, you know?

I understand.

It's okay.

But if there's anything that

I can help you with,

anything at all,

just let me know.

That's sweet, thanks.

I'm sure we'll bump

into each other again.

I'm sure we will.

[car engine starting]

Bye.

See ya.

[radio music]

[static]

[metal clanging sounds]

[buzz from torch]

[metal clanging sounds]

[buzz from torch]

Alright, lets get your hand

on you.

[metal clanging sounds]

[metal clanging sounds]

There we go.

[metal clanging sounds]

[buzz from torch]

[buzz from torch]

[clanging metal sounds]

[buzz from torch]

[clanging metal sounds]

[buzz from torch]

[clanging metal sounds]

[loud radio frequency]

[buzz from torch]

[loud radio frequency]

[buzz from torch]

Ohhh!!!!

[radio announcer reporting

football game]

Woo hoo!

Yee ha!

[laughs]

There you go baby,

go go go.

[radio static]

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