Iron Man Page #5

being responsible for the way that...

- Oh, this is great!

- Oh c'mon, wait! Tony, Tony!

- I'll be in the shop.

- Hey, hey, Tony, listen.

I'm trying to turn

this thing around,

but you gotta give me something.

Something to pitch them.

Let me have the engineers

analyze that, you know,

draw some specs.

- No.

No. Absolutely not.

This one stays with me.

That's it Obie.

Forget it.

Alright, well this

stays with me then.

Go on, here, you can have

a piece. Take two. - Thank you.

Do you mind if I come down there

to see what you're doing?

Good night, Obie.

Day 11, Test 37,

Configuration 2.0.

For lack of a better option,

Dummy is still on fire safety.

If you douse me again,

and I'm not on fire,

I'm donating you to a city college.

Alright, nice and easy.

Seriously, just gonna start off

with 1% thrust capacity.

And 3, 2, 1.

Please don't follow me around

with it either cause I feel

like I'm going to catch on fire

spontaneously. Just stand down.

If something happens,

then come in.

Again, lets bring it up to 2.5%.

Okay, this is where

I don't want to be.

Not the car,

not the car.

It could be worse.

We are fine.

Okay, we are getting there.

Yeah. I can fly.

- Jarvis, are you there?

- At your service, sir.

Engage head up display.

Check.

Import all preferences

from home interface.

Will do, sir.

Alright, what do you say?

I have indeed been uploaded,

sir. We're online and ready.

Start the virtual walkaround.

Importing preferences and

calibrating virtual environment.

- Do a check on control surfaces.

- As you wish.

Test complete. Preparing to

power down and begin diagnostics.

Ah, yes... tell you what.

Do a weather and ATC check.

Start listening

the ground control.

Sir, there are still terabytes

of calculations needed

before an actual flight.

- Jarvis...

Sometimes you gotta run

before you can walk.

Ready? And 3, 2, 1.

It feels like a dream.

Alright, lets see what

this thing can do.

What's the SR-71's record?

The altitude record for fixed-wing

flight is 85.000 feet, sir.

Records are made

to be broken. C'mon!

Sir, there is a potentially fatal

build-up of ice occuring.

Keep going!

Higher!

We're iced up, Jarvis!

Deploy flaps.

Jarvis?

C'mon, we gotta break the ice!

Cut power.

Note:
main transducer feels

sluggish at plus 40 altitude.

The whole pressurization

is problematic.

I'm thinking 'icy' is

a probable factor.

A very astute observation, sir.

Perhaps if you intend to visit

other planets, we should

improve the exo systems.

Connect to the Cisco, have it

reconfigure the shell metals.

Use the gold-titanium alloy from

the Seraphim tactical satellite.

That should ensure

the fuselage integrity

while maintaining power

-to-weight ratio. Got it?

Yes. Shall I render using

proposed specifications?

Thrill me.

Tonight's red hot,

red carpeted,

right here at the

Disney Concert Hall,

where Tony Stark's

third annual benefit for

the Firefighters Family Fund

has become the place to be...

Jarvis, did we get

an invite from them?

I have no record of

the invitation, sir.

...haven't been seen in public

since his bizarre and highly

controversial press conference.

Some claim he's suffering

from PTS and has been

bed ridden for weeks.

Whatever the case may be,

no one expects an appearance

from him tonight.

The render is complete.

Little ostentatious,

don't you think?

What was I thinking?

You're usually so dicsrete.

Tell you what... throw a little

hot rot red in there.

Yes, that shall help you

keep a low profile.

The render is complete.

Yeah, I like it.

Fabricate it and paint it.

Commensing an

automated assembly.

Estimated completion

time is five hours.

Don't wait up for me, honey.

The weapons manufacturing is...

only a one small part of what

Stark Industries is all about...

- Hey Tony, remember me?

- I sure don't.

You look great, Hef.

What's the world coming to when

a guy's gotta crash his own party?

Look at you!

- Hey, what a surprise!

- I'll see you inside.

Listen, take it slow, alright?

I got the Board where

I really want them.

You got it. Just cabin fever,

I'll just be a minute.

Give me a Scotch,

I'm starving.

- Mr. Stark?

- Yeah?

- Agent Coulson.

- Oh yeah, the guy from the...

Strategic Homeland

Intervention

Enforcement and

Logistics Division.

God, you got... you need

a new name for that.

Yeah, I hear that a lot.

Listen, I know this must be

a trying time for you,

but we need to debrief you.

There's still a lot of

unanswered questions,

and time can be a factor

with these things.

Lets just put something

on the books.

How about the 24th, at 7 p.m.

at Stark Industries?

Tell you what... you got it.

You're absolutely right.

Well... I'm gonna go to my

assistant and we'll make it date.

You look fantastic,

I didn't recognise you.

- What are you doing here?

- Avoiding government agents.

- Are you here by yourself?

- Where'd you get that dress?

It was a birthday present

from you, actually.

- I have great taste.

- Yes.

- You, uh, wanna dance?

- Oh, no, thank you. No.

Am I making you uncomfortable?

No, no.

I always forget to

wear a deodorant,

and dance with my boss

in front of everyone

that I work with,

in a dress with no back.

- You look great, you

smell great. - Oh, God.

But I could fire you,

if that'd take the edge off.

I actually don't think that you

could tie your shoes without me.

- I'd make it a week.

Really? What's your

social security number?

- Five.

- Five?

You're missing just a

couple of digits there.

The other eight? That's why

I got you, for the other eight.

- How about a little air?

- Yes, I need some air.

- That was totally wierd.

- Totally harmless.

It was totally not harmless,

by the way.

- Nobody was watching us.

- Everybody who I work with...

I think you lost objectivity.

I think they... we just danced.

No, it was not

just the dance!

You don't understand

because you're you.

And everybody knows exactly who

you are, and how you are with girls.

And all that,

which is completely fine...

But you know, then me, you're

my boss and I'm dancing...

Because it makes me look like...

the one who's trying to...

I just think you're

overstating, that's all.

And we're here, and then I'm...

wearing this ridiculous dress...

And then we were

dancing like that and...

- I would like a drink, please.

- Got it.

I would like a

vodka martini, please.

Very dry with olives,

lot of olives,

like at least three olives.

Two vodka martinis, extra dry,

extra olives, extra fast.

Make one of them dirty.

- Well... Tony Stark!

- Oh, hey!

Fancy seeing you here.

- Carrie. - Christine.

- That's right.

You have a lot of nerve

showing up here tonight.

Can I at least get

a reaction from you?

Panic. I would say

panic is my reaction.

I was reffering to your

company's involvement

in this latest attrocity.

- They just put my name

on the invitation,

I don't know what to tell you.

Rate this script:4.7 / 3 votes