Ivan Tsarevich & the Grey Wolf Page #2

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- I slept.

Really? How about this from the stove?

And how about this from the stove?

I did not hear that, Father King.

And then also on the stove...

- How, how?

- Well?

Oh, no. I surely would know,

if I had heard it. I don't have a stove.

- What about you?

- Me? No!

I just thought, what if you

heard exactly that last night.

It would be very funny.

So, I thought tonight

over your proposal.

It was quiet, nothing hindered me,

especially that...

And I decided. You're right!

I'm getting old, I need a successor.

- Where shall we look for him?

- Oh... King-Father!

We are loyal to you.

We would do anything!

For example, if you said:

Marry Vasilisa!

What would I do? I would marry her!

I am a statesman, I must obey.

What does this have to do with being a statesman?

Eating state flan.

Grey, what do you say?

I would have called brave warriors, let

them compete, for example who can shoot farther.

Who can pole jump higher, and who can solve a riddle.

In short:
ciltius, altius, fortius.

That is, an olympian.

A winner will marry Vasilisa.

Yes, you have a head on your shoulders.

While here with these ears.

- King-Father!

- What?

Anyway, I am going to Vasilisa.

Compile me a list of the best grooms from the neighboring kingdoms.

And you prepare the sports facilities by the 14th.

That's all. Free to go.

So this is your market?

Ours is completely different.

You sell more,

and we mainly buy.

- And what's that?

- Sauerkraut.

Well, it is.

But we do it differently.

You pickle the cabbage, and we cabbage the pickle.

What is this? A bucket? No,

our buckets work differently.

You pour the water inside,

and we pour outside.

To pour faster.

What if she does not want to listen to me?

- That is possible.

- What do you mean possible?

- Be careful with what you're saying.

Am I king or am I not the king?

- King

Here. If she starts to get stubborn,

I will force her to get married!

- That's right. Show the royal will.

- What's right? I pity the girl.

And I do not want to do it.

What if some Ivan Tsarevich comes,

starts walking around in his

underwear, giving orders.

- I'm going to try.

- Everything will be well.

What will be well? What

are you, a Russian radio? Take off the crown.

- What?

- Take off the crown, I say!

- So it will all be easygoing, laid back.

- King, don't start with the marriage.

- Start from afar.

- You're instructing me?

Thank God in I've been in politics

for over 200 years. Open.

He is afraid of his daughter. Not afraid

of anyone, but afraid of his daughter.

Ok. Daughter...

- What weather today, right?

- What?

Why do you immediately say: "What!" Nice weather today I said.

How beautifully your

cat plays Tchaikovsky.

- This is Schubert.

- Nobody asked!

You play Schubert, as if it

were Tchaikovsky. Even worse.

- By the way, why are you not at work?

- I have lunchtime.

Well then go to lunch.

Shoo, I say!

You, father, are trying in

vain, I will not get married.

What's with the "marriage"?

And anyway...

Why not?

You are too lazy to get married, or what?

Not that difficult.

Well, I mean, you know.

Here, look what grooms we picked for you. All are handsome!

Ok, this one does not count.

Look. This one's too old.

But this one is normal.

Well, almost normal.

- If I ever get married, it

will be only for love!

- What is love?!

- Why are you here?

- Me? What about you?

I was not here...

Despot!

Voluntarist!

These are your sunflower seeds?

Funny.

In our far-far-far-away kingdom, they are the

size of a fist. Eat one - and you're full.

That's the high striker you got.

We do it differently.

You strike it with your hands, and we

strike it with our feet.

- Tyrant!

- That's it, I have no strength left.

Here's my king's word! You are going to get

married to the first stranger that shows up!

- Lost. All is lost.

- Why lost?

- He said the first stranger. - So run faster, and be this first

stranger.

Exactly!

Wow, how many of the same

you have, and we do not.

And here's the first stranger.

Minister!

Lock him away, and guard him,

so he does not run away.

Grey, dart into the kitchen and

get the holiday table ready.

Lock yourself up and weep!

Bees, stop buzzing!

Grass, get green!

Nails, unpop!

Birds, do that... Sing!

A wedding, wedding, wedding was full of song and dance.

And it was carried away on wings.

The wedding was so vast it needed more space.

It needed more sky and more land.

The wedding was so vast it needed more space.

It needed more sky and more land!

How is that? Enough or do you need more?

- A little more.

- More of what?

A little more or everything.

Where am I?

Who am I?

Um, okay. "Who am I" -

that's a bit too far.

I am myself, Ivan.

But where am I?

And it's not complicated -- I'm here.

Ugh, all's fine.

Stop! And where is "here"?

A slight concussion. I assign

this concussion a third degree.

No, a fifth.

I got a little too excited.

Gave my daughter away to who knows whom.

And the main thing - I don't even know why.

The wolf brought me his resume.

Not a hero, not a prince,

and he owns no property.

- So deny him, King-Father. - I can not, I gave the king's word.

- Come on, tell him that um...

- It was a mixup.

What? What? Oh, it got mixed up.

What got mixed up?

- What got mixed up? - The mind.

- Oh, your mind got mixed up. - In fact, I did get mixed up.

- How about me instead? - What should I say?

- You changed your mind.

Changed my mind.

No, it is not so simple to take back

the king's word. I need an excuse.

- Oh, how about a test!

- Oh, attest! - What about attest?

- What does it have to attest?

- Idiot.

He must pass a test.

Idiot. He must pass a test.

Who's an idiot?

- Who is an idiot?

- You.

- You.

- What?

Tell him that long ago, before

marrying the royal daughter,

the groom had to pass a test.

To go somewhere and to

bring something back.

- Well, go where and bring what?

- I do not know.

Correct. He should go I

know not where and fetch

I know not what.

- Wow. That's cleverly devised.

- Who was that?

- Where?

- The one who was just talking.

- Him? It was you.

- What are you talking about?

- How could it be me?

I have a beard and wear a crown.

And that was all dark and flat.

It's was just a distortion.

I am getting old.

But the idea is good. And we'll give

him three days to do it all.

He won't have time, he won't bring anything.

It's locked.

Well, the door is good, and solid.

Oh, this one is unlocked.

But this is not a solution, because

it's only an entrance. What to do?

- Hey, why are you crying?

- I'm getting married.

- Then why are you crying?

- I am being forced to get married.

- I see.

- This is bad.

This is tyranny.

Well... for sure.

- And getting married to whom?

- To the first stranger.

Nightmare! A living person to the first stranger.

- Well, who is it?

- I have not even seen him.

Maybe some uneducated fool.

And ugly!

Most likely.

The first strangers - they are something.

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