Jim: The James Foley Story Page #5

and this fighter jet just started circling

above and just swooped right down

and hit a building that was

a couple hundred feet from us.

[explosions]

We started seeing the civilians coming

out and just clutching nothing really,

just ashen faces, there was

rubble everywhere.

It was chaos.

And the plane came around again,

dropped another bomb

really close by and actually we

were right across the building

and we looked up and we can see

the rubble start coming down.

That bomb had hit a family

of, uh... seven.

[Jim]

Who was killed?

[Jim] Who?

[Nicole] It was horrific in the

scale of it, but also just...

I think nothing prepares you for seeing

kids being killed and maimed in that way,

and I know that Jim really loves kids, so, you

know, we were both just... We didn't say anything

until we got to the field hospital

where they were bringing the bodies.

And we were both just in this mode of

just needing to get the pictures out.

I think when we were finished that night though,

we kinda like sat down, and lit a cigarette

and we just started talking about it and

really there wasn't very much to say though,

you know, like,

what is there to talk about when

you witness something like that?

So we just sort of sat in silence.

[Zac] Nothing prepares you for that,

like no amount of courses, nothing.

You just go there and you'll

either handle it or you don't.

And that's cool. Like either

you run, or you stay.

And there's... Not one

is better than the other,

but just don't delude yourself.

Some people aren't meant for that.

[screaming]

[Diane] The shine was starting

to come off in a way.

There was a period of time where

journalists were welcomed with open arms

because they'd seen what

had happened in Libya

and when that didn't come about

after a year,

after year and a half, after two years,

it's just like, okay, what are you

guys doing? You know I had a doctor

tell me at the hospital that Jim

helped raise money for an ambulance.

He was like, "Look, you guys are

in and out of here since one year,

and it's the same exact thing except

it's worse. I don't wanna talk to you."

If the populace on the ground

whose side you're documenting

is getting more uneasy with you,

or less willing to help,

you're very dependent on the goodwill

of the people you're around.

It's just that moment of like,

how well can you know anybody?

Even say you know someone very well.

Two years of war, three years of

war, that's going to change anybody.

They warned journalists, they were

like, Al Qaeda is coming, you know,

maybe even worse than Al Qaeda is coming

and nobody is going to help us against

the Assad regime except for these guys.

So it was all there.

One of the main things I noticed

the last time when he came out,

he looked really hollow

and he was quite silent.

You know, he had like that

amazing room-brightening smile

even if he had seen terrible things, as

one does. It was disheartening to see.

[Mark] Before he left for Syria, I think we

made it a point, we were gonna bring him down

to Nathaniel Hall district and go

to the comedy club down there.

The comedians were horrible, but

like I was in the mood to laugh,

so I'm just laughing

at you know, anything.

And I just remember looking at

Jim and he was just dead faced.

And then me and Jim went outside for

a cigarette, like we always do,

he said he had to go.

We had a long hug,

I remember I hugged him

a really long time.

Just like hugged him really

tight. I said be careful.

Obviously I didn't feel like that was

the last time I was gonna see him,

but it was a good night... A good

end of the night, you know?

[John Sr.] I guess If I had

any regrets, Brian, that I

regret that I found it difficult

to communicate with Jim.

I don't know if it's the male thing or

whatever it is, but I just wish I was able

to share more of who I was

with Jimmy and get him

to share who he was with me,

which might have been just as

difficult, you know?

He would interview us when he came home,

and he did a great job

interviewing us 'cause

you felt like talking because

he was listening.

You know, he wanted to know how we were.

And that was when he came home,

that's what he wanted to know.

He wanted, "Well, how are you,

how you doing?"

You know, "How's Grandma,

how's Katie and Mark?"

And he just wanted to know how

everyone was doing, you know?

So in that way, Jim was

kind of solitary.

He was home, end of October, right before

he went back for Syria that last time

and he was going... I

remember he was leaving here

and he was going to

New York to get a helmet

from somebody which was good, we were like,

"Getting safety equipment, we like this!"

Yeah, I remember we left and we

dropped him off at a train station

and he, you know, we were gonna

see him again in December,

He was supposed to come home kind of...

Oh, yeah, you have a good memory, yeah.

He was supposed to come home mid December.

And we were like, be safe, see you soon,

- and unfortunately, that didn't...

- Yeah.

- [sobbing] Sorry.

- It's okay, I think that's enough.

[Nicole] We'd spent the beginning of

November in Aleppo again with Jim,

John Cantley and Mustafa, our translator

who's become a friend of ours.

I had had some issues with

my camera that week,

so, I just was like, "Jim, I gotta go back

to Istanbul, I'll see you guys in a week."

You know the moment when

I said bye to Jim,

I had this feeling of

reluctance to leave,

I think in a way maybe it did upset the

balance that he and I had shared for so long.

There are superstitions when

you're in a war zone.

There's like this one thing he and I

shared which was our lucky lighter.

It's very common in the middle east. It's like

the evil eye to ward off evil spirits, you know?

We'd used it for everything and for some

reason it never ran out of lighter fluid.

It's just like this stupid idea,

you put your hopes into one object

to make it feel safe.

I think about it a lot afterwards

that he didn't have it with him.

Maybe if I just gave him the lucky lighter,

everything would have turned out okay?

I don't know.

That day, I was in Reyhanli,

which is the border town,

and I would have seen them

in about 5:
00.

So I checked in and I told Jim,

I'm like,

"Hey, you know I'm here

so text me when you get in."

You know, 5:
00 rolls by

and I started to worry.

7:
00, 8:00 rolls around and I'm

like, "Something is really wrong."

So I called Mustafa,

and the first thing he said to

me was "Nicole, I'm so sorry.

Um, I didn't... I couldn't do anything,"

I was like, "What are you talking about,

what happened?"

He was like, "You know, we were coming. We

were in the taxi, we were coming to Turkey

"to meet you and this van

with these four guys with guns,

"they stopped us on the

road and they told us

"to get out and they were pointing

their guns at us and screaming

"and the gunman made Mustafa

tie up their hands

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