Jimmy Hollywood Page #2

before that scumbag did.

How many times have I told you

not to go in my purse?

Don't ever go into my purse again.

Ever!

Kid...

I think it'd be a good idea

if you'd hand over your gun.

You want to look for this guy?

You think you could recognize him?

What?

I say you think you could recognize him?

I want to look for this guy.

Ill kill the motherf***er

if I find him, trying to take your money.

Please just spare me this, will you?

Why? You think Im kidding? Huh?

You think Im fooling around?

Yeah? Im fooling around?

See this? I find him, Ill put him away.

-What are you doing with a gun?

-Lowlife scum.

Jesus Christ!

Are you crazy?

Blanks.

William gave me the gun and the blanks.

That's a smart idea. A gun with blanks.

Its all an illusion. That's all it is.

Put that away, please.

You make me nervous with that thing.

That's the whole point.

That's the whole point.

That's the point Im trying to make.

You made it for me.

It frightens you. See?

A guy terrified you today with a gun.

Its terrible.

It was terrifying, right?

A guy pulled a gun on you.

That's why I want to get him.

l mean, you know, it shouldn't be.

-You still scared? You all right?

-Yeah.

Be careful with my heart.

-Huh?

-Be careful with my heart.

Self-promotion.

That's what it's about.

You can't rely on agents.

Do it yourself. That's what I say.

You'll see, those calls

are going to start coming in.

You can bank on it.

Then, with the contacts I make,

you become

Lorraine De la Pena,

haircutter to the stars.

Yeah, but in the meantime,

are you going to get a job, Jimmy?

-Im working on it. Im working on it.

-Okay.

-You're handsome.

-Yeah? Well, you know what they say.

The camera can only photograph

what it sees.

Not bad.

-What you doing out here, man?

-Hey. Jimmy Alto. Mr. Meyerhoff sent me.

Oh, yeah, right. Yeah. Come on in.

I been out there since 6:30.

What time you open?

You ought to get the coffee going

'cause about 7:
00, they're gonna be in here.

Right.

You know how to

work one of these things, right?

-Yeah, sure.

-All right. Cool. Go on to it, then.

-So, Mr. M tell me you an actor, huh?

-Right.

Yeah. I seen you in anything?

You ever see that show Matlock,

the role of Cliff?

You was on that show?

No. I was up for the role of Cliff.

-You was up for the role?

-Yeah, I was up for the role.

Let me tell you something

about this business, okay?

Between you and me, and it goes no further.

No problem.

I gave a hell of a reading for that part,

but I think they felt

I was a little too strong for Andy Griffith.

Really?

I blew Andy Griffith off the screen.

I mean that's how strong I am.

You understand?

I mean, I know this guy. I had that part, too.

But, you know,

there's a lot of politics involved...

-Yeah, lots of it.

-...and not necessarily how good you are.

And Im a little intimidating, you know?

-Im so strong, I intimidate other actors.

-Well, you know, man,

I just thought

they wanted to get the best actor.

You know, that's what I thought.

Its not always about talent.

I hear that.

So, man,

you know what you're doing here, right?

-Stack up about a half dozen of these.

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You good to go, right?

You know how to do this, right?

I did this in a Broadway show.

-You was on Broadway, man?

-Well, off-Broadway.

Off-Broadway?

Off-off-Broadway, but they're all the same.

-People don't understand.

-I hear you. I hear you.

Well, you know what?

Im going to go off-off-Broadway.

-Let's get this cooking started. All right?

-All right.

-You good to go, right?

-I got it.

All right.

I think there's something wrong

with the button.

Well, why don't you try

the off-off-Broadway button?

Id like a half a cup of coffee.

I only wanted half a cup of coffee.

Im thinking of putting together

a one-man show.

-Tour de force kind of thing.

-Yeah.

That way you don't have some other

actors dragging you down, you know?

A one-man show, that's the way to go.

I got to find some piece

that really shows my...

My... I don't know, I can't find the words.

Like homeboy with the big mustache?

You know, the Huckleberry Finn dude?

What his name?

-Mark Twain?

-Yeah, yeah.

I could do Mark Twain. I could do that.

But I need something

that stretches me more, you know.

Something that really challenges me.

Something that'll show off

my talents and my abilities.

Yeah, well, why don't you show your

talents and abilities on this here?

Like to go to movie premieres?

-Hey, what the hell is this?

-What up?

What up? There's nobody here.

I mean, how do I know who gets what?

Oh, man.

Where everybody at?

Are they outside?

They're all outside. Something's going on.

Back up on the curb.

-I saw it out of the corner of my eye.

-Everyone, please

get back up on the curb!

Back behind the cones!

French toast, right?

Pastry and a coffee, half decaf, half regular.

-Eggs over?

-What, are you on glue?

Portuguese sausage.

-Portuguese sausage?

-That's right.

You were in this restaurant?

-Cream cheese and bagel?

-Lox and bagel.

-Whitefish.

-Whitefish? I've been looking for you.

How am I gonna do this?

How am I gonna do this?

Got him!

All right! Terrific! Way to go!

All right for the boys in blue!

And girls, too!

I don't know who gets what here.

F*** it! This sh*t's getting cold!

Soup's on!

Has anyone seen the corned beef hash?

Hey, waiter!

Hey, shorty!

Hey, hey. I asked for scrambled eggs.

Scrambled eggs.

These are not scrambled eggs!

-Now they're scrambled!

-What about my egg whites?

-Whitefish!

-I found the whitefish.

I don't know where your toast is!

Give me the bagel.

Another half cup of coffee!

Suck it off the floor.

I like it hot!

Waiter!

You eat this!

Mr. Alto, is this a cafeteria?

No.

Then he says, "That's what I thought."

I hired a waiter,

so this is not a cafeteria.

I said, "Yeah, but I had this problem."

He says, "I can hire. I can fire."

End of story. End of job.

-What are you going to do now?

-What am I gonna do?

Sometimes you gotta

take the bad with the strong.

Is that an expression?

I don't know. Its new to me.

Yeah, it's a new expression.

Hey, there goes John.

He's winding up for the pitch.

Want to watch him again?

What the hell's that all about?

Why does he do that?

I told you.

Tell me that again.

The story goes

they brought him up to the majors.

They brought him in.

Relief pitch, crucial game,

something like that.

First pitch he threw, boom.

Gave up a home run, lost the game

never pitched again in the majors.

Supposedly what he's doing

is always re-enacting that pitch,

trying to get it right,

living that moment.

Boom.

-Any of this sound familiar to you?

-Huh?

Come on. Ill do it again for you tomorrow.

Hell of a thing going through life

living that moment over and over again,

regretting that you never got it right,

you never had another chance. Poor f***.

Im not gonna spend my life

living the same moment

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes