John Dies At The End Page #4

before he spoke it...

word for word.

- "Have you heard the name..."

- Have you heard the name

Nathan curry?

A guy about your age.

His parents own a body shop

right here in town.

- No.

- "How about shelby winder?"

How about shelby winder?

Heavy girl.

Senior at east side high.

- Justin white?

- No, sorry.

- What happened?

- Everything was obvious now.

All the walls of the maze

turned to glass.

I immediately knew...

this list of people had all

been at the party last night

and they were all now dead

or heading there.

How do you know that?

How do you know any of this?

Magic?

You know damn well why.

That black sh*t John took

made blood contact with you.

Now you're getting high,

partner,

on the soy sauce.

It's got you.

At least nine people

at the one ball inn

at closing time 12 hours ago...

Three are missing.

Your friend is here.

The rest are dead.

Your friend is

the only known survivor

of the one ball nine.

And now don't take

offense at this...

but he's not looking

too healthy right about now.

Did he say anything

this morning?

John called me last night,

talking crazy...

paranoia, hallucinations, the whole

monsters-in-his-apartment bit.

Said he couldn't remember how

he got where he was like that.

Did he say what he was on?

No.

You know we'll

find out anyway, right?

I'm not interested

in booking a bunch

of your raver buddies

for popping pills.

To somebody like me,

dead bodies are what matters.

Now if somebody is out there

selling poison...

I would tell you if I knew.

So what, that's how

everyone died?

Overdose?

What about that guy?

You know him?

Yeah, he was there.

Whatever John had,

he got it from this guy.

That's Bruce Matthews.

He runs an amateur

unlicensed

pharmaceutical operation

on the corner

of 30th and Lexington.

And those?

Before.

After.

What could even

do that to a person?

Like a bomb or some kind of...

nothing you'd know how to do.

I'm sure of that.

Maybe it's something not within

the bounds of our familiarity.

What I...

sir, we need you

in the other room now.

Hey, what the hell's going on?

God damn it.

Your friend...

He's dead.

Sorry. Hold on.

So, uh...

Black stuff...

this soy sauce.

That's a drug, right?

- Oh, I'll get to that.

- It makes you smarter when you take it.

It lets you read minds

and all that.

It heightens your senses,

I think.

I don't know. It's like... when

you're on it, it's like overload.

Like if you hooked

your car radio up

to one of those interplanetary

SETI antennas,

you just get sh*t

from all over the place.

You can see things

you shouldn't be able to.

And you've still got

some of this stuff?

- I'm getting to that.

- You're on it right now.

You're on it right now

and that's how you did

the whole thing

with the coins and the dreams

and all that earlier.

Yeah, I took some today.

- It's fading though.

- The effects don't last that long?

The side effects

don't last that long.

The effects will last

the rest of my life, I think.

Maybe longer.

Wow. Okay, so...

so wait a minute.

The kids that died...

that was that

rave overdose, wasn't it?

I remember all that... a couple of

years ago, seeing that on the news.

I thought they got a hold of some

tainted ecstasy or something.

- You're the guy...

- Something like that.

Okay, so if I contact this...

Detective appleton, he'll

remember talking to you?

Good luck finding him.

So what do you think?

Huh, well...

I think you've got a book here,

probably, if you flesh

it out a little bit.

A book?

Meaning a work of fiction?

Meaning it's all bullshit?

Hey, a story's a story.

I'm just a feature reporter,

so the fact that you think

it happened is my story.

You know, I don't remember leaving the

house with any coins in my pocket.

I think you could've

slipped them to me.

Without you feeling it?

And the thing with the dream?

Come on, Arnie.

I think you're trying

to be one of those...

one of those mentalists,

like that Dr. Marconi on TV.

Dr. Marconi may be

theatrical,

but believe me,

he's not an act.

Well, I caught

Marconi's act in Vegas,

and your story sounds like a lot of

the same kind of hocus-pocus to me.

Come with me.

I wanna show you something.

- Where are we going?

- Just out to my truck.

All right.

You see it?

No. Or, you know,

it's an empty cage.

Turn your head

so you're looking at me.

Yup.

Now you should see the box just

out of the corner of your eye.

Let's go back inside.

Your story was more interesting.

You're gonna die, Arnie. Someday

you will face that moment.

And at that moment you will face

either complete nonexistence

or you will face

something even stranger.

On an actual day

in the future, Arnie,

you will be

in the unimaginable.

It is physically

impossible to avoid it.

Think about that.

Now,

without turning your head,

look at the box.

Ah! Sh*t!

Oh sh*t sh*t!

Sh*t!

What the sh*t is that?

Wait a minute.

How the f*** did you do that?

What the f*** is that thing?

What the f***, man?

There's no name

for it in this world.

It's pretty freaky

though, right?

Wait. No no no no. You...

you made me see something.

You made me see something

out of my own head.

You freaked me out so that

I would see something.

No, it's really there.

I'm surprised you saw it

so easily though.

You must have an open mind.

Most people only see it that

fast if they're stoned or drunk.

I want to tell the rest

of my story, Arnie.

I need to.

I need to get it out.

But you have to take it

for what it is...

- the truth.

- Okay.

Until I figure it out for real.

Okay.

Eh, that'll have to do.

Come on.

Anyway, so the cop comes in,

tells me that John is dead.

Your friend...

He's dead.

What? How?

Calm down. Calm down.

He went into convulsions or something.

His pulse stopped.

We've got ambulances. One

will be here in 30 seconds.

We've got Vinnie

doing CPR on him.

Vinnie is a lifeguard

in his off hours.

Now you listen to me, boy.

Here's what you're gonna do.

I'll be back in five minutes

and then you are gonna

tell me the truth.

And if you obstruct me

in any way,

you're gonna live the rest of

your days wishing you had not.

Yeah?

Dave, this is John.

What? Did you get out?

Yes and no. Are you still

at the police station?

Yeah, we were...

we were both...

have I died yet?

Dave, can you hear me?

Umm, yeah. I, uh...

everyone ran out of the room.

They said you had...

no no, there's no time

to explain all this right now.

Look, leave the police station right

now during all the commotion.

They'll have EMT's

hauling my body out,

lots of people will be

standing around looking.

Just walk out. Don't run.

That'll attract attention.

Just calmly walk out like

your business is done there.

Also, is there any way

that you can steal my body?

- What?!

- No, probably not.

Okay, never mind.

We'll have to work around that.

Okay, have you reached

the sidewalk yet?

No, I'm still standing

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