Jumanji Page #10

KRYSTYL:

Oh, my God... Hold still; hold still!

He cannot. Krystyl tries to hold his head steady.

CLOSE UP on Eric’s eye:

A TINY, WHITE WORM slithers across the inside of Eric’s eye,

disappearing into the other side. Krystyl is horrified.

KRYSTYL:

Worms!

ERIC:

(writhing)

Wor... Wor... Worms...?

KRYSTYL:

Tiny, parasitic worms... I think

you’re filled with them!

ERIC:

The... creatures...

KRYSTYL:

... are dwelling and growing inside

of you!

Eric SPASMS, knocking over the table along with the game. The

dice tumble away.

KRYSTYL:

No! We can’t lose those!

She grabs the dice and holds them tight in her fist.

ERIC:

Krystyl... it hurts! Make it stop!

KRYSTYL:

I DON’T KNOW HOW!

Eric SPASMS again, grasping onto Krystyl’s wrist. In shock, she

DROPS the dice on the floor.

KRYSTYL:

NO!

The dice read FOUR and TWO, totaling SIX. Her piece moves...

KRYSTYL:

No, no, no! Not again!

Her clue SWIRLS. Eric continues to shake and twitch in pain.

Krystyl reads her clue, and her fear morphs to confusion.

KRYSTYL:

(reading)

“Merchandise, wares

and trinkets galore.

Peruse his selection;

caveat emptor.”

Eric has lost consciousness by this point.

KRYSTYL (CONT’D)

“Caveat emptor...” That’s Latin.

(thinks hard)

It means... “Let the buyer beware.”

A plump arm appears and DRAPES around Krystyl’s shoulders. It

is followed by none other than Felix J. Kauffman!

FELIX:

“Buyer?”

Krystyl SCREAMS. Felix lets go and straightens up, never losing

his Cheshire Cat grin. Eric is completely oblivious.

KRYSTYL:

Who are you?!

FELIX:

(tipping his hat)

Felix J. Kauffman, seller of items,

purveyor of goods, and ah...

He nods toward Eric on the floor.

FELIX (CONT’D)

Servant to the downtrodden.

Krystyl stares, unsure.

KRYSTYL:

Are you... from the game?

FELIX:

Indeed. With just a mere roll of

the dice, you have successfully

enlisted the products and services

all contained within...

He turns, revealing a massive wooden emporium.

It is decorated with jungle foliage and seems to contain

infinite items on its shelves and walls.

FELIX (CONT’D)

My fantastical emporium!

He walks into the store and appears behind the counter.

KRYSTYL:

Okay... What do you sell?

FELIX:

Everything and anything. So...!

He claps his hands together and rubs them in anticipation.

FELIX (CONT’D)

What might you be in the market for

this fine evening?

Krystyl looks toward Eric, then back at Felix.

KRYSTYL:

Well... can you help my friend, here?

FELIX:

Possibly... what does he need?

KRYSTYL:

He’s sick! He’s filled with worms!

He needs medicine, or something!

FELIX:

Ah! A precocious player, pursuing

plentiful prospects potentially

pertaining to prosperity, presently

perilously plagued by problematic

parasitic protozoans... presumably.

Krystyl stares at the odd, droll man.

FELIX (CONT’D)

But not to worry! Any of Jumanji’s

many, many endangerments are very

easily negated by the one and only

unsurpassed, Felix J. Kauffman!

He RUMMAGES under the counter. He takes out a small glass

bottle filled with dark green liquid. The label reads “TONIC.”

FELIX:

May I present to you, Felix J.

Kauffman’s Homemade, All-Natural,

Anti-Parasite Tonic! One hundred

percent guaranteed to rid the body of

any and all organisms which do not

belong!

KRYSTYL:

(hopeful)

That’ll cure him?

FELIX:

For the right price...

Krystyl reluctantly leaves Eric’s side and approaches the store.

She takes out her wallet and hands over a twenty dollar bill.

KRYSTYL:

Would this be enough?

Felix looks at the bill and sneers.

FELIX:

Well, if it isn’t “Old Hickory,”

himself. Sorry, but that’s a face

I should like to forget. No sale.

Krystyl extricates more items from her wallet.

KRYSTYL:

I don’t suppose you take Visa...?

FELIX:

Vis-à-vis what?

KRYSTYL:

No, I mean... forget it. Well, is

there anything in this attic that

you like?

She turns her head, and Felix’s jaw drops. He seizes her

ponytail and examines it thoroughly.

FELIX:

My heavens! Such wild, untamed

crimson; the color of fire itself!

Such a sensuous, delicate texture...

My dear, is this... natural?!

KRYSTYL:

Yeah... why?

Felix grins, and takes out some SCISSORS from his vest pocket.

FELIX:

I do believe we may be able to work

out a transaction.

INT. ERIC’S HOUSE – ATTIC – NIGHT

Krystyl, now with a very short haircut, is tilting Eric’s head

back, pouring the last of the tonic down his throat.

Eric is fading in and out of consciousness. He is soaked with

sweat and his breathing is labored.

Krystyl lays his head down onto an old cushion, and sighs.

FELIX (O.S.)

The tonic works very quickly, but

he’ll need time to rest and build

up his strength.

Krystyl looks to where the game was, but discovers it is

missing. She turns and spots Felix examining it in his hands.

FELIX (CONT’D)

So, are you the parrot or the beetle?

KRYSTYL:

Parrot.

FELIX:

Twenty-five spaces... I must say, I’m

impressed. I didn’t think any player

could survive beyond the first two or

three turns.

KRYSTYL:

We almost didn’t.

FELIX:

(eyeing her)

No?

KRYSTYL:

So far, we’ve had to deal with

scorpions, wild pigs, leopards, a

room full of crazed monkeys-

FELIX:

Oh, the mandrills. It’s hard not to

love them.

Krystyl crosses her arms and glares.

FELIX (CONT’D)

... But I take it you found a way.

Krystyl seems overwhelmed with her situation. She casts her

gaze on Eric, sleeping peacefully.

Something changes in Krystyl. Her quirkiness and naiveté

disappear. She becomes deadly serious and determined.

Krystyl stands and walks to Felix’s store.

She rests her elbows on the counter. Felix still smiles.

KRYSTYL:

You’re definitely from the game?

FELIX:

The name Kauffman is synonymous with

honesty.

KRYSTYL:

In that case, I want to buy something

else from you.

FELIX:

And what might that be?

KRYSTYL:

Information.

Felix stands up straight, as does Krystyl.

FELIX:

About what, exactly?

KRYSTYL:

Jumanji! What is it?! Where did

it come from?! What makes all the

animals appear?! Why’s it trying to

kill us?! Who created the game?!

FELIX:

Which of those questions would you

like me to answer?

KRYSTYL:

ALL OF THEM!

Eric stirs and moans. Krystyl quiets herself down a bit.

KRYSTYL:

Mr. Kauffman, you’re the first thing

that’s come out of the game that

I think we might be able to trust.

Please, I’m asking you, help me

understand what we’re up against.

Felix considers her request.

FELIX:

I will do so only on one condition.

KRYSTYL:

What’s that?

Felix’s smile slowly vanishes. He leans in close and drops his

voice to a whisper.

FELIX:

You must promise me that one of

you will win the game.

Eternal seconds pass. Finally, Krystyl nods her head.

KRYSTYL:

I promise.

Felix takes a deep breath, and begins to tell his story.

FELIX:

It was the year 1895. My associates

and I were marching through the most

foreboding jungles of Africa...

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