Kazaam

#Slide, slide

Slippity slide #

#I do what I do

just to survive #

#Slide, slide

Slippity slide #

# When you're livin'in the city

It's do or die #

- #Roll along #

- # That's what you do #

- #Just roll along #

- # That's right ##

Hey, welcome back, Max.

- Thought you'd get away from us, huh?

- Let go of me!

Don't tell me this is

nothing about lunch money.

It's a math problem.

If we took all the dough...

from a dork on the floor,

would it be enough?

Two dollars and seventy cents?

We're gonna be living large on this.

- If you guys want a

real score-- - Yeah?

It's the wholesale mart.

Fifth and Broadway.

Rolexes, gold chains,

who knows what.

Third aisle,

locker 882, upstairs.

And all you need is...

this.

- We'll be in touch.

- Later... loser.

- Come on, man. Come on, man.

- What a wuss!

Another alien abduction,

Maxwell?

They wanted my optic lobes,

but they didn't get a thing.

- The key to the supply closet, Maxwell.

- The key?

To the supply closet.

Oh, I left it in the door,

Mrs. Duke.

And you also left us without enough

time to hear your little presentation.

But I want to hear it anyway,

right here after school!

I'm home!

- Don't tell me.

- You were kidnapped by gypsies

and sold to the circus.

Hey, can I help it if Mrs. Duke is really

a very angry man trapped in a woman's body?

Oh, I see. Another

homework malfunction.

And, gosh,

what a surprise, detention.

But,you know,

the only good news is...

you weren't here...

when we were robbed.

What kind of maniac would steal

the motor to our Hoover?

You were supposed to come home

today and help me clean up, remember?

- It's just Travis.

- What is that supposed to mean?

You told me, men are like buses.

There's always another one.

I never said--

You know that this is the only day

that I don't work a double shift...

and I really wanted the

house to look nice for Travis.

Mom, it's not like

he lives here or anything.

Your feet?

What is this?

What is this? Huh? What have

you got here, dreadlocks?

No, wait, look.

It's a tiny, living creature.

- Who put a squirrel in your shorts?

- Max...

- try and look like this guy.

- I hate that picture.

Max, we have to talk.

Hey, guys.

Oh, hey. We're in here.

Looking good, Max.

You're not looking

so bad either.

Max,you ever hear

of a guy named Buster Keaton?

- Isn't he some dead

black-and-white guy? - Apparently.

- But he's a very funny dead guy.

You tell him?- Tell me what?

Hello?

Max, um...

Travis and I...

want to get engaged.

I thought he was just

coming over for ribs.

- We wanted to wait 'til all

of the papers were signed.

- ''Papers''?

- The divorce papers.

There were some things

left unsigned by your father.

My father? But I thought

you didn't know where he was.

- I didn't.

- Listen, Max...

what matters now is you and your

mom can move on with your lives.

- That's why we want to get engaged.

- Wait, what about me?

- Why didn't you ask me?

- Max--

What about me?

Max.

Well...

now he knows.

Hey, I want to talk to you!

Get him! Come on, man! Come on!

Come on!

Get over here, man!

- Yeah, go get him!

- Watch it!

Hey, come here,

you little con artist!

There are no gold watches,

no gold necklaces!

We'll get ya!

We got him now!

Understand... you're messing

with my little brother.

Don't tell me. They couldn't

fit the key in the lock?

- There were no lockers.

- And your map was crap.

So there's only one place

this thing's gonna fit.

And it ain't Mrs. Duke's supply closet.

Come on!

Where you going?

Hey, what are you kids

doing in there?

Get outta there!

Where'd he go?

Go!

- I'm going around!

Go around!

Let's go!

Let's get him, boys!

Oh, no!

I'm dead. I'm dead.

Come on.

We got him now.

How do I shut this thing off?

- Hi.

- You little turd!

You think

you got skills?

Can we just pretend

this never happened?

Who... dare to wake me?

Ain't gonna make this a mystery.

Don't wanna do time

on your wishes three.

Watch it, boy!

You don't want to dis me!

Or I'll dish out my misery.

Now, who's that sorry wanna-be

that disturbed my z's?

Let's get outta here!

Go on! Go, go!

Get out of my way!

If you want to be number one,

I'm sorry, boy, that's been done!

But if you got the itches

for a sack of riches...

don't matter how avaricious...

I'm the man that

could grant your wishes!

Hey, don't turn

your butt on me!

I'm the man of the ages,

straight out of the pages!

Hang on! I'm contagious,

outrageous, spontaneous!

You can't contain this!

I am Kazaam!

- I'm really happy for you.

- Where do you think you're going?

Make your three wishes, and I'm out of your

face, back in my box and out of this place.

Listen, Mr. Psychopathic

Dork in the Basement...

I don't think

you're ordering anybody!

Do you realize who I am?

I'm your genie!

In that case, I wish I was as

big as you, but not so stupid.

That's not a wish!

That's an insult!

Besides, I don't do those kind

of wishes. I do material wishes.

See? Things. Stuff.

You gotta want something, kid.

Listen, you want to pull the wool over

someone's eyes? Go get a sheep, okay?

Listen, it's only 'cause this world

really, really gives me tension...

that I'm gonna do something

I don't ordinarily do.

I'm going to beg.

- Now, make a wish. Please?

Okay.

All right, okay.

Give me a car.

BlackJaguar-XKE.

Yes! Yes, yes!

- Jaguar? Black?

- XKE.

Jaguar, black.

Better stand back.

I am Kazaam!

- Jaguar, black, right?

- Yeah.

Okay.

Kazaam!

Okay, well, you just stay

here. I'm gonna go now.

- Uh-oh.

Hey, Kazoo?

Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.

- Kazoo?

Oh, Kazoo.

- Say nighty-night.

Kazoo. Kazoo.

- Come on, you gotta eat.

No, I'm not--

- Please. Look, it's delicious.

- No, I'm really-- Travis, no.

It's very easy.

Come on.

Please. Just hold them

between your fingers like this.

- Travis, I know--

- Squeezea little.

He's in the house.

- Max, honey, is that you? Max?

Hey, hey-- Honey, what

happened to your face?

- I'm okay, all right?

Who did this to you?

- Max, what happened to

your-- - Just leave me alone!

Max.

- I'll handle it.

- No, I really think I should.

Please.

Max?

Max, can I come in?

Wow. That's really

great. You finished it.

Hey, you're not building a

neutron bomb over here, are you?

- That could be a little dangerous.

- Don't touch that.

You okay?

You want to tell me

what happened?

You don't like me

very much, do you?

Listen, Max, I don't intend to

take the place of your father.

It's just that I love your mom,

and I want to marry her.

I'd like us to be friends.

Anytime you want to talk...

I'll be here.

Mom?

''Tuna. Home at 3:00.''

Sure.

''Nicholas Matteo. ''

#I'll make your dreams

come true #

# What you want

I will do #

#I'll make your dreams

come true #

# Gonna make your dreams

come true #

- #I'll make your dreams come true #

- #Hey #

#Baby,just me and you I'll

make your dreams come true #

- What the--

- #I'll make your dreams #

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