Kept Woman Page #2

Simon!

Oh, hello!

Hey! I just wanted to say

thanks again for the wine.

We really enjoyed it.

I'm glad to hear that!

Do you have a cellar?

Well, how did you know that?

Oh, dust on the bottle.

I just kind of figured.

Hmm! You're

very perceptive.

Ah!

Listen, I hope I

didn't offend you

with my man-studies joke.

No! No, I've heard

them all before.

OK. Um, well,

I also was wondering

if you were free to join

us for dinner Thursday.

I'd love to.

Great! 7:
30?

Perfect! I'll see if

I can dig up something else

out of my cellar.

Perfect!

All right, well,

I will see you then!

- OK!

- OK! Bye!

Oh! I have to say this is..

this is amazing wine, Simon.

Well, I'm really glad

that you like it.

I just.. I feel kind of

guilty pairing it with barbecue.

No, no, no, no!

Now is the perfect time

to enjoy this one.

In fact, I fear had I left it

in my cellar one day longer,

it may have spoiled.

Hmm!

Besides, I think you're

selling yourself short,

because this looks to me

like some gourmet grilling.

Evan does most of

the cooking around here.

Yeah, it's nothing special.

Just simple stuff, really.

Things like

stir-fries or pasta,

anything that doesn't

take a ton of prep or...

Really?

Ah!

So you don't cook?

I can reheat with

the best of them.

She makes a mean rhubarb pie.

I haven't made one in a while.

Tell me about it!

Well, you used to make them for

me when I did something good.

Now, I don't think I've been

pie-worthy for quite some time.

That isn't true.

Well, I'm, uh, impressed.

And I don't know how I would

survive without TV dinners.

They still make those?

They're a bit of a relic

of a bygone era, I guess,

but then again, so am I.

I come from a very

traditional house.

And my father provided,

and my mother would cook,

And she would threaten

to stab anyone

who would set foot

in her kitchen

with a butcher knife!

The good old days!

You must get lonely in

that house all by yourself.

Yes. I wasn't always.

Oh.

I used to live in

it with my fiance,

but I suppose the white

picket fence wasn't for her.

I'm sorry.

It's OK!

I'm sure she's very happy

with the guy that she

was cheating on me with,

so cheers!

Well, I..I can't even

look at another woman

without Jess sensing it.

Ah! The possessive type, huh?

I think the word you're

looking for is "intuitive."

Well, she's that too.

Did she tell you that she's

not only a graphic designer,

but also a part-time

crime fighter?

No, she didn't!

It's just a hobby.

I'm part of an online

group that works

to dig up information

on old cases.

I think I've heard of this.

This is a sort of

crowdsourced crime-fighting.

It's a lot of work that

usually leads nowhere.

But you are drawn to what

you're drawn to, I guess.

Absolutely.

She also wants to write a book.

Wants to?

What's stopping you?

I haven't found

the right story, I guess.

Well, maybe your new life

will help you discover it.

- Maybe!

- Yeah!

Are you sure he's

not seeing anyone?

That's what he told me.

That's weird.

I could've sworn

I smelled perfume on him.

Well, maybe it's just

some fancy cologne.

Hmm... maybe.

You know, you should set one

of your girlfriends up with him.

Oh, I don't know.

I'm afraid they'd all be

too possessive like me.

Oh! Come on!

When we first started dating,

you went into my closet,

and you put a bunch of lipstick

on all my shirt collars.

Oh! Now, why

would I do that?

Oh, I don't know,

maybe to show all the women

that I was already taken.

Oh!

Simon!

Hey!

Oh! Hi!

Hi! I'm, uh, trying

to do some gardening,

but this worked for

my window planters,

but do you have anything

with a little more heft?

The handle on mine broke,

and I haven't gotten

around to replacing it.

OK. Uh, I'll just wait for

Evan to get back to the car.

Are you making

dinner for someone?

No. Why do

you ask that?

I.. That's just a lot of

food for a single guy.

I hate shopping.

So I tend to buy as much

as I can at once.

OK!

- OK!

- OK!

Well, have a lovely

rest of your day.

You too!

He said he never cooks.

Maybe he was inspired

by my culinary skills.

I'm serious.

He..he was being weird.

Look, we don't really know him.

Evan, he was hiding

something from me.

What if he's having an affair

with one of his students

and he wants to keep it quiet?

Whatever it is,

something is off about him.

I can feel it.

You need to stop doing this.

Stop doing what?

Turning nothing into

one of your whodunits.

That's nice!

I'm serious! Look,

we have to live here.

Unlike everything else

in this neighbourhood,

Simon's not boring,

so maybe you can come up with

a conspiracy about someone else.

Maybe you could not talk

to me like I'm crazy!

Jess, we live in

a house that we can't afford

that I pay for working a job

that I hate, by the way,

so you could feel safe!

I think you can't

feel safe anywhere!

Who said anything

about not feeling safe?

Isn't that where this is going?

It sounds like

it's going to a place

where you blame me for

a decision we made together.

Look! Speak of the devil.

- Hey!

- Hi!

I hope it's not too late.

I saw the light was on.

No, not at all!

I'm sorry, Jessica.

I forgot that I had

bought another shovel

after the other one broke.

That's if you still need it.

Thank you.

Hey, do you wanna..you wanna

come in for a drink?

Uh, no, I..I have an

early class in the morning.

OK, well, next time, then.

Absolutely!

Good night.

Good night.

You know, there is

something off about him.

He's nice.

Simon!

It's Jessica.

Are you home?

Don't look at me that way.

You haven't met this guy.

- He's weird!

- You're paranoid!

He dresses weird.

He talks weird.

He literally wears his

personality on his sleeve,

but he has the most

boring furniture.

It's like he doesn't

even live there.

And he keeps the drapes drawn

as if he's hiding something.

I don't know, Jess.

I know you get those

million-dollar hunches,

but, honestly, this doesn't

sound like a whole lot to go on.

But it all seems a little

off, though, right? Right?

Yeah, but if being

a little off was a crime,

we'd be having this conversation

in jail right now.

You're starting

to sound like Evan.

Uh.oh!

Trouble in paradise?

Oh, he's just stressed

about the mortgage,

and he thinks I should be

spending more time working,

which he's right about.

All right, look,

I can see this is

stressing you out.

Do you want me

to check into this guy?

No. No, it's fine.

All right. Call me if anything

else comes up, all right?

I will.

All right. Chin up!

Night!

Simon! It's Jessica.

Are you home?

Hello!

How are you? Jessica!

Simon!

Are you busy?

No, just trying to slog

through this design project.

I found something that

I think you're going to like.

Um, would you like

to take a break and pop over?

Uh, sure!

Great.

See you soon.

Bye!

Hi!

Hi!

I like your place!

That's right. You haven't

actually been inside before.

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