King of the Avenue

All l gotta say

is one name.

Chi-chi Rodriguez.

Puerto Rican. Bam.

Mother f***er. Puerto

Rican, professional golfer.

And all respect due,

l don't think you'd never

ever have a professional

black golfer.

l don't know

about that.

Oh, come on,

now, Scooter Pie.

Next thing you know

he's gonna be talkin' about

a black president too.

You better do

whatever the f*** you gotta do

to make sure you count

boss man's money right too.

Y'all need

to apologize.

F*** him.

Man, kiss

my ass.

Done deal, right?

With all that

sh*t talking

you did,

y'all just woke

boss man's

baby boy,

Where your

daddy at, boy?

He's taking

a shower.

Let me ask

you something.

Do those pajamas hide

the pee stain when

you wet the bed?

Go on back into the bed

before your daddy

catch you

while you're

awake, go,

go ahead.

Why you go say

some dumb sh*t

like that?

Mommy just needs to take

her medicine.

Hey, Daddy.

What's the

flashlight for, Taz?

l told you l ain't

raisin' no punk.

l got the same

dream again.

lt's just

a dream,

little man.

Your momma

Ioved you,

you know that.

Get some sleep.

Daddy?

Do you kill people?

What made

you ask that?

l got into a fight

with Malcolm

at school.

Did you get

your ass kicked?

No, l beat

him pretty bad.

Yeah. So

what's the problem?

He gave me his

Iunch money and

apologized, but

some kids told me

that my daddy

was gonna kill

his daddy.

Two things:

one, it doesn't

Iook like you're

gonna need

lunch money tomorrow,

and two

l'm not ever

gonna lie to you.

Now, l wouldn't kill

somebody's daddy

for a fight

between two

little kids,

but if somebody

took something

from me,

or hurt somebody

that l loved,

l mean, if somebody

hurt you real bad

l wouldn't kill

their daddy.

l'd kill their

whole family.

l love you, Daddy.

l love you too.

There now.

You get some sleep.

Guess what?

One day, this is

gonna be yours.

Woo! l'm digging

this sh*t all day, son.

F***ing-h right. This the

mother f***ing future

right here, son.

Hey, Dooney,

turn on the TV.

The Lakers on.

Right, Boss.

In sports-

Walk away

from the TV, Dooney.

What?

l said walk

away from

the TV.

Come on.

Just walk away.

Uh-huh. Now

walk back toward.

Oh, come on.

Shut up, mother f***er.

Walk back to me.

You see

that sh*t?

Hm.

What?

Shut the

f*** up.

Open your shirt.

Wha-?

Shut the f*** up.

What the

f***, man.

Open your shirt.

You better be

quiet about it.

Now, you're

gonna tell them

everything's cool.

Everything -everything

is cool, man.

Tell them you gotta

go to the bathroom.

-l'm going

to the bathroom

for a minute.

Now take your f***in'

pants down now.

No, what

the f***, man?

Take your

mother f***ing

pants down.

Take your mother f***ing

pants off.

Huh?

What the

f***, man?

Open your mouth.

They were giving

me 25 years, man.

Open your

mother f***ing

mouth, huh?

You f*** over

your n*ggers, right?

Suck that sh*t

like a good b*tch.

Get your b*tch ass up,

come on, keep the sh*t

in your mouth.

Keep it in

the mouth, easy.

Twenty five

years, man.

Come on.

Are you okay,

Uncle Dooney?

l'm as far away

from okay

as you can get,

little man.

How come?

l betrayed my friends.

They were gonna

give me 25 years.

They were gonna

take me away from

my family

for a long time.

That's a

Iot of time,

huh, Dad?

Yeah, that's

a long time, son.

l think you did

the right thing,

Uncle Dooney.

Because l wouldn't

want to be away from

my dad that long.

Turn around and

sit straight.

You seen that?

Yeah.

See, that's what

happens when you

betray your friends.

You know better

than to talk about

this to anyone,

you got it?

Okay. l love

you, Daddy.

Yeah, l

Iove you too.

My father's life,

a drug dealer,

A killer

and dead at 38,

He left behind

a son that loved

him very much.

And l did,

He was my world,

Despite what he did

and who he was,

l loved him as if

he was a doctor,

a fireman,

a humanitarian,

but he wasn't,

He was, for

the most part,

one of those people

that society

could probably

do without,

Nevertheless, he

was my father,

my first example

of what a man

should be like

l watched people

treat him like

a god

so to me he

was a god,

I feared him

as much as

I loved him,

and I wanted to

be just like him.

That's probably why l

became a drug dealer,

I tried to make sure

my father's fate

wasn't mine,

Like most people

in my Jine

of work,

l thought l was

smarter than

the game,

l didn't play it

like everyone else,

Although l could afford

to live anywhere,

l chose to live

somewhere upscale

but not too upscale

where my finances

would be an issue,

Nobody wanted to see

someone too flashy

in a

conservative neighborhood,

So to the people

who lived around

me and my family,

l was Joe Ordinary,

I lived what I

considered the

sucker's life,

nine to five

till you die.

But most importantly,

I had a routine.

Good morning, Taz.

Good morning, Greta.

Kiss my wife, Amanda,

and our son

who I named after

my father, Norman,

Remember we play

the Tigers today.

At six o'clock.

Have l

ever forgotten?

Taz.. .

Done, l'm there,

Mwah. Bye, baby.

Bye.

l told everyone,

including Amanda,

I was the East Coast

rep for a West Coast

consulting firm.

That way no one could ask to

come by my job or see where

I worked.

You know, Greta,

you water that same

spot every morning.

Mm-hmm.

Now this,

this was

my dope house,

l just call it that because

l would never have drugs

of any kind here,

I'm the boss.

I leave that to

the soldiers.

I just all it that

because it's where

I do all my dirt.

After Mom died,

nobody wanted to let

a known black drug dealer

adopt a white orphan

but hey, cash is king,

And after years

of fighting

with courts,

l was his,

There you are again,

with that photo album.

When l got older,

I realized that family

is someone that

you end up with,

You don't have

a choice in

the matter,

l swear you look

at that thing

a hundred

times a week,

But what he did to

make me his son

was a choice

and it made me

love him even more.

Baby.

You gotta be

f***ing kidding me.

Hello?

Alright, l'll see

l'll see you in

a little bit.

Am l not on

the f***ing phone?

l'm taking

your car.

No you're not.

l'm taking it.

You take

the truck.

l don't feel

like driving that

big old thing.

You're the one

that wanted

the SUV

with 20

TVs in it,

not me.

That sh*t is ghetto.

Oh, l know

you didn't

call me ghetto.

l'm not saying

you're ghetto.

l'm saying driving

around in a SUV with

But, baby,

isn't that

what you say,

the man makes the car,

not the other way

around? Right?

You're always

saying that.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

Yeah, you're learning.

The answer

is still no.

Why?

As calm as

I was playing,

what was about to

happen would be huge,

So huge it was

sure to make me

king of the avenue,

l was getting

ready to make a

deal with the Mexicans,

l start by getting my product

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