Kinky Boots Page #2

"job back"?

Potentially.

OK, brace yourself.

Ladies, gentlemen and those

who are yet to make up your mind.

Whatever Lola wants

Lola gets

And little man

Little Lola wants you

Make up your mind to have

No regrets

Recline yourself

Resign yourself

You're through

I always gain

What I aim for

And your heart and soul

Is what I came for

Whatever Lola wants

Lola gets

Take off your coat

Don't you know you can't win

You're no exception to the rule

I'm irresistible you fool

Give in

Lola.

All me, sweetheart.

I design everything in that club.

It's my costumes, my lighting,

my dancers, my show, love.

I mean, it's me.

Bit of a dark horse, your boyfriend.

He's my boss.

Well, he was my boss.

I got laid off.

But now he seems to think

I'm his business analyst or...

Look, you'll have to excuse Charlie.

We don't have many transvestites

in Northampton.

I'm not merely a transvestite,

sweetheart.

I'm also a drag queen.

It's a simple equation.

A drag queen puts on a frock,

looks like Kylie.

A transvestite puts on a frock,

looks like...

Boris Yeltsin in lipstick.

There, I said it.

Ta. Whatever. Don't kid yourself.

You're never more than ten feet away

from a transvestite.

You made her redundant?

You miserable sod.

Things aren't very good

in mers shoes.

Well, I'm not, certainly.

Yes. Precisely.

How much do you weigh?

The right amount.

How much do you drink?

I mean... They're womers boots,

are they, that you buy?

You have to buy womers boots

because you...

You see, the distribution of pressure

on a conventional female heel

cannot be expected

to support a mars weight.

And if trans... you know, whatevers,

drag queens are everywhere,

like you said, then, not in a...

Living Dead kind of way but...

Then, do you think there is

a niche market for proper, good,

decent, built-to-last boots

for women... that are men?

All this way for my advice.

I feel like Oprah.

I'd like to measure you for it,

go home, make a pair.

Who gets to keep the boots?

A little warning.

The answer is, "You do, Lola."

You do, Lola.

Where do I come to pick it up?

What, Prices of Northampton, is it?

Yeah, but I'll come to you.

Oh, no. As they say, a good

pair of boots is won'th walking for.

No, you see,

I come here all the time, and so...

I'll come to you.

Right.

Look behind you.

What? What is it?

It's your niche market, Charlie.

Big niche.

Ladies, gentlemen

and those of you

who are yet to make up your mind,

our very own Lola.

He walked into my life

And now he's taking over

And it's beautiful

Yes it's beautiful

I've gone with better looking guys

He's gone with prettier looking girls

But now we're beautiful

I think we're beautiful

I don't need love affairs anymore

I don't need love affairs anymore

Can't you see

It's the chemistry

You really must agree

together we are beautiful

We are beautiful...

Well?

Cool.

I was thinking, we should...

If you haven't got anything else on

then maybe you could come back to...

To your house?

The factory.

I'm gonna need someone on

the web to research markets and...

If Pat got on those websites

she'd have a heart attack.

Yeah.

Besides, you started it,

being in that strop.

Oh, well.

I mean, I just had the strop, Charlie.

You saw the idea.

And that is why some of us end up

with our names above the factories

and others just on

the clocking-in cards.

Right.

Well, as someone

with their name on a factory,

can I invite you to have your name

on one of my clocking-in cards?

They say, calm down,

they say whatever life throws at you,

whatever emotions you feel,

somebody somewhere

has written a song about it.

Now, I hope that'll be true.

Until somebody writes a song called

No One Stays Young Forever And

One Day I Hope You Get Dumped

For A Younger Model,

You Whiny Little Welsh Bastard,

I'm just gonna have

to sing your memory.

Show us your tits.

Certainly. Ladies and Gentleman,

there they are.

Give 'em a round of applause.

Are they as wrinkly

as your arms, love?

- Is there a man in there?

- Good one.

I have to tell you, sweetheart,

my breasts are as smooth and beautiful

as the day that I bought them.

Bastard.

Hey.

Forget it, Don. Out of your league.

Nah. You seem to forget,

women get turned on

by the sight of the working man.

Morning, Charlie.

Lola.

Come in.

Sorry it's a bit messy. We...

I thought we agreed

that I'd come to London.

I warn you, Charlie from Northampton,

I have a terrible habit of doing

the opposite of what people want.

Some might say

that attempts of certain people

to make a man out of me as a child

is the reason that I now wear a frock.

If I get the feeling somebody

didn't want me to come to Northampton...

- No.

- Also, I can tell

from years of experience when I'm

being smuggled in through a rear door.

- That's the rough-stuff room.

- Is it?

It's where we dump

all the offcuts and misshapes.

There you go.

I wondered why I was drawn to it.

- Pardon?

- Nothing.

I'll raise.

That's George.

Listen, Mel, all I say is,

when it comes to attracting women

some men don't have to speak.

This is cosy.

All right.

Here we are.

Well?

What do you think?

Burgundy.

Please, God, tell me

I've not inspired something burgundy.

Red.

Red.

Red.

Red. Charlie boy.

Rule one. Red...

... is the colour of sex.

Burgundy is the colour

of hot water bottles.

Red is the colour

of sex and fear and danger

and signs that say, "Do Not Enter."

All of my favourite things in life.

- Who's that?

- He's got your new girlfriend in there.

- But they're comfy.

- Comfy?

Sex shouldn't be comfy.

Thank God.

I thought it was just me.

I don't know what you're used to makir,

but now you're making sex.

Two-and-a-half feet

of irresistible tubular sex.

I mean, that heel. For God's sake.

It won't break.

That's what you wanted.

Not if it means looking like

a Ukrainian peasant.

It's better than flouncing around

like a...

You wanna show your niche market

a little more respect, Charlie.

- Let's ask your girls.

- No.

Girls. Would you wear

something like this to go out?

No.

You'd look all right in 'em, sweetheart.

You've pulled.

Oh, yeah.

Ladies.

Well, I'm very flattered.

But frankly,

if you can't get women to wear 'em,

you'll never get blokes like me

to wear 'em.

Do we still have a workforce?

Dorll come around.

Once he's stopped...

...walking up and down, swearing.

- Well, that's his problem.

- No, it's our problem, Lola.

This is Northampton.

You have no idea what it's like, OK?

- It's not Soho.

- Amen.

Look to the heel, young man.

The sex is in the heel.

What's that supposed to mean?

Sex is in the heel.

Stilettos require constant balance

from the upper leg

causing the muscles

of the backside to tense

and appear pert and ready for mating.

It's physically impossible.

I mean, am I missing something?

To make a stiletto, something that thin,

bear the weight of a man is just...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes