Kiwi Flyer

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1

[Dramatic orchestral music]

My story starts

in my hometown, Nelson.

This is

what it looks like today,

but it was different years ago.

[Old-fashioned car horn]

Everything was black and white.

Just kidding.

My great granddad was going off

to fight in the war.

That's not him.

That's him.

Little did he know what dangers

and perils were waiting for him.

Whoa!

I love you!

All:
Cool!

[Crash]

[All laughing]

When the kids saw

how much fun it was,

they started building

their own trolleys.

And, of course,

they started racing them.

And the winners,

they became legends.

Like my granddad.

In 1959, he won.

It was the most famous thing

anyone in my family

had ever done.

Years later,

it was my dad's turn

to carry on the family tradition

and he would've won...

[Cat screeches]

If it wasn't for that cat.

The next year,

he entered again.

And he would've won then...

[Tires screeching]

If it wasn't for that

oil spill at the bottom of the course.

The next year was the year

the wasps came to Nelson.

Year after that,

steering failure.

And the year after that

was the flood.

That's when my dad

retired from racing.

But the Trolley Derby

has continued

to the present day.

[Cheers and applause]

Whoo!

[Car horn honking]

But last year,

dad and I made a deal.

For the next race,

dad would make me a trolley

and I would drive it.

We started right away.

Aerodynamics,

that's the secret.

After extensive testing

in our wind tunnel,

we had our design.

That looks suspiciously like

my hairdry...

[Hairdryer pops and hisses]

Dad even came up with

a name for it:

Kiwi Flyer.

[Blow torch buzzing]

[Metal Clank! Clank! Clank!

[Cell phone rings]

G'day, mate.

Yep, she's all done.

Yeah, I'll see you soon.

Mmkay. See you, dad.

He's finished the frame.

That father of yours

better hurry up,

or he'll get no dessert.

[Car pulls up]

Ah, that sounds like him now.

Uh, no.

It's a policeman.

[Knock at door]

Mrs. Walker?

I have some terrible news

about your husband, Peter.

Would you like to take a seat?

[Both sobbing]

[Sizzling]

Whoo!

Whoo!

[Car horn beeps a tune]

What a pile of junk.

Slower than my Nana.

Better looking than your Nana,

too.

- What was that?

- Nothing.

You're not thinking about

going in that race,

are you, Walker?

- No.

- Good call.

No point

if you're not gonna win, eh?

He'd be like his dad

if he went in it.

A real legend...

As a loser.

What'd you say?

I said

your dad was a legend...

As a loser.

Look, the whole town knows that.

LA LA LA loser

You got a problem, Walker?

Well,

what are you gonna do about it?

You little...

go on! Give him one!

Ah!

[Groans]

I'll get you!

Oi! Wait up!

[Tires squealing]

Oi!

Idiot!

Got ya now, mate.

[Gasps]

Love, love, love

in the world

[Coins clattering]

Oh.

Hey, get back here!

I'll wring your neck!

Sorry!

You little...

[Ship horn blasts]

Hey, mum.

Hey.

Everything okay?

Yeah, just thought

I'd come and see you at work.

Nice of me, eh?

Uh-huh.

Mum took over dad's business.

She wasn't too bad

at water blasting.

It's definitely better

than her driving.

[Electronic voice]

One new message.

G'day, Karen.

Mike here, from down the road.

I wondered if you'd want to go

to the stock cars Sunday night...

[Machine beeps]

End of messages.

Any messages?

Nah.

Mum, did people think

dad was a loser?

What?

What are you talking about?

The Trolley Derby.

No. Okay?

Now,

can you go do your homework?

That last school report

was spectacular

for all the wrong reasons.

But I was watching the cars...

Ben, I don't want you to have

anything to do with that race.

You know that.

But...

you need to concentrate

on your schoolwork.

- Now go do it!

- Yeah, but...

Go!

[Slams fridge door]

[Kids chattering]

[Whisle Blows]

[Car horn honks]

I am crossing here!

Well, I'm driving here!

Sorry.

Um, I've spoken to him

about doing his homework.

- Oh, no, no...

- He's been through a lot.

It's the yellow line.

Sorry?

You're parked

on a yellow line.

- Oh!

- So could you, um, just...

Sorry. Sure.

No worries.

It's a pity we're not going to

see you this afternoon.

Those boats won't

water blast themselves.

Got your key?

Yeah.

Okay.

I'll see you after school.

- Kiss?

- Yeah, nah.

I have a library book to return.

- Bye.

- Bye.

[Sentimental music]

Bye.

Both:
Mr. Lumsden, the traffic.

[Sighs]

Hmm. Hmm! Ha!

[Groans]

- G'day.

- Hey.

Did you see Zombie P.I.

Last night?

Nah. Homework.

Yeah right.

Dude, they had exploding heads.

It was insane!

[Sighs]

Fast, Amanda. Faster.

Katie?

No. Amanda.

Harder. Come on!

Amanda.

[Laughs]

Great!

- Ah!

- Sorry!

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, I'm...

It was that foot, wasn't it?

- What?

- Crushed it.

Snowboarding nationals

last winter.

- Uh, yeah.

- Really?

Yeah, would've made

the New Zealand team

for his age, eh, mate?

Yeah, that's the one.

He doesn't like to

talk about it.

Anyway, see ya.

[Quietly]

Limp.

What a p*ssy.

Hmm.

And that's why I've got

the biggest quality

used car franchise in this town.

Because I don't settle

for second best.

Just look at these.

M.V.P., queensland, 1979.

"Slippery hips" Wayne,

they used to call me.

Regional car salesman

of the year

and, of course,

the Nelson Trolley Derby

championship cup.

In our family now

for four years.

And this year

with our new driver,

we're gonna make it

five in a row.

That was his, eh?

And how do you get these?

By trying hard?

No. You gotta win.

Because if you don't win,

you're a loser.

And that's some advice

you can take to the bank.

Okay, thank you very much,

Mr. Worthington.

Wayne.

Wayne's Classy Cars.

Thank you very much, Wayne,

for sharing your...

and listen, kids, if you

reckon your mum or dad

are driving around

in a loser car,

tell them to come and see me

at Wayne's Classy Cars

and I will do them right.

- Any questions?

- Yeah.

My dad said you got kicked out

of the club for match fixing.

What does match fixing mean?

Listen, mate,

you tell your dad

to come down to

Wayne's Classy Cars.

- I've got a special...

- Okay, okay.

Thank you very much, um, Wayne.

Let's show our appreciation,

class.

And thank you, too, Shannon.

Can have a seat, there.

Now, Amanda's mum

couldn't make it today,

so Amanda's gonna come up here

and tell us what she does.

Amanda.

Where's your mum?

She could tell us

about water blasting.

My mum's

a biochemical researcher.

She helped to discover

this molecule.

She works at

the Cawthron institute.

It has 63 carbon, 22 hydrogen,

24 oxygen...

[Giggling]

Oh. Bad luck.

Lucky it wasn't

polytetrafluoroethylene.

[Bell rings]

All right.

Wait, wait, wait.

First of all, thanks to your

parents for coming along today

and also, there is a notice

in the newsletter about

after school

extension studies classes.

If you'd like to do those,

get your parents to sign it.

[Kids groan]

Off you go.

Oi.

Now's your chance.

Go and help her.

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