Koning van Katoren Page #2

---

'Prince Royal of Katoren'?

- Sorry.

- Give me some money.

Please, give me some money.

- A coin.

- Here you go.

Thank you, thank you.

A friendly town?

Where are you going to stay?

That's not what I meant.

Don't get any ideas.

Well, bye now.

I'll see you around.

Can I have your phone number?

Then I'll call you when I've done it.

Seriously?

Strictly business, okay?

- Where did you get my number?

- Research. That's called research.

- I beg you.

- Go on, go away.

No, don't take me away.

Don't take me away, I beg you.

- High five.

- High five.

You want to film?

Yes, very nice.

- Two coins.

- Two coins? Okay. One, two.

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

Children, time to go to school.

Come on.

Okay, thank you.

- Hello. Buongiorno, signore.

- Buongiorno.

I'm looking for...

I'm looking for the town hall.

- The city house.

- City hall. There is no city hall here.

- No city hall.

- No?

You look like us,

but you talk like a Tara.

Let's see if you drink

like one of us.

Cheers.

He drinks like a Tara.

I think it's me you need.

I'm the sindaco.

The mayor.

How do you do. Lanzo.

- How-do-you-do-Lanzo. Stach.

- Stach?

- I don't understand.

- I was sent here by the ministry.

Look, here it is.

'Relieve all of Swindledale's

residents of their knob noses. '

'Relieve all of Swindledale's

residents... ' All of them? Tutti?

You'll never be able to, of course.

Or are you very rich?

Watch out, a mosquito.

Or do you also want a potato nose?

Come.

Look, don't hold it against me.

How are you? Everything alright?

Doing okay?

I don't understand

why on earth they send...

- Me.

- Someone...

No, sorry. Come, come here.

That's not what I meant.

Ina, look who's here. Stach.

- Stach, this is Ina, my wife.

- How do you do.

Come. Sorry. Listen...

Rosemary.

- Basil.

- Yes.

Pretty girl.

Yes, that's my daughter.

Thank you.

- What is this?

- Urtica dioica.

- Urtica...

- Dioica.

Stinging nettle. Never tasted it?

It's delicious with pasta

with spinach and cheese.

And it's good for foruncolo.

- Foruncolo?

- Yes, foruncolo.

Pimples.

Can you tell me more

about those mosquitoes?

Yes.

They're the cause

of all our problems.

We've tried everything, filling up

the marsh, poison. Nothing works.

- And that medicine?

- Yes, that...

Forgive my wife.

Our daughter is ill and...

and it's very hard for her.

No, come, we have a guest.

Come here. Pull yourself together.

- I'm cold.

- Yes, it's cold. Come here.

Wait, I have something.

- Here.

- Now look at that.

There.

Buongiorno.

Ciao, Maria.

How are you doing?

Your nose is getting better, isn't it?

Come, give me a nice smile.

She's Sarah's daughter.

Se non hai pi niente da perdere,

non ti resta che vincere.

If you have nothing left to lose,

all you can do is win.

- What is that up there?

- That's where the Taras live.

This is where we have to be.

- Buongiorno.

- Buongiorno.

Hey, Kim.

Buongiorno, signori.

A party tonight?

Party?

- Wait here.

- Okay.

- Come with us.

- What's the matter? What did I do?

- Hold on. Let go of me. Excuse me...

- Stay calm.

Perch? Let go of me.

Lanzo, Lanzo.

- No, wait.

- Go away.

Let go of me.

He's with me.

He's here with me.

I can ask my uncle for money

for the medicine. For Isabella.

But boy, you've seen what it costs.

I don't even make that much in a year.

And then you only get a small jar.

- Have you ever been inside?

- Of course not, it's only for Taras.

Why would you want to go there?

Hey, aren't you staying?

The cloakroom's downstairs.

- To the formula. To Rinomal.

- To Rinomal.

To Rinomal.

Comrades, friends, welcome.

It's been another good week.

You've worked hard.

As our former colleague

Sin Pharma used to say:

'It's a dirty job,

but someone has to do it. '

However, there are people who say:

'Those Taras have too much money. '

Urtica dioica.

Stinging nettle.

Urtica dioica.

It's good for foruncolo.

- Where did that come from?

- There.

- Upstairs, guys.

- Get him.

Freeze.

This way.

- He's upstairs.

- Lanzo, open up.

- Please, I need your help.

- Run.

- I have to talk to your wife.

- Come.

Well, well, well.

Look who we have here.

Our brave hero.

Here.

- You've been deceived.

- Listen to this young man.

You've all been deceived.

Look, we made it ourselves.

The medicine. With plants

that grow everywhere here.

- In other words, for free.

- It's free.

We tested it on the nose of this girl.

You all know her: Miss Katoren.

You've deceived us. Go away

and don't come back. Get out.

- Yes.

- Stach for mayor.

- Stach for king, king of Katoren.

- King of Katoren.

King of Katoren.

King Stach the First?

King of Katoren.

King of Katoren.

Just call it 'beginner's luck'. I'm sure

that's it. He won't do it a second time.

beginner's luck

- Are we there yet?

- Almost. Did you have a nice nap?

Did you type a nice blog?

- How will you handle this assignment?

- I'll see when I get there.

- Don't you have any better questions?

- Such as?

'Say, Stach, how does it feel

to be a hero?'

One mission accomplished.

Beginner's luck.

- Is there anything you wouldn't do?

- What's that?

If there's anything

you wouldn't do.

- Is this an interview?

- Never mind.

- Jump off the Aloysius Tower.

- What?

You asked if there was anything

I wouldn't do.

Jump off the Aloysius Tower.

I guess because your father

tumbled off it.

Sorry.

Sorry, I shouldn't have said that.

Stach.

What?

- Stach...

- Just let me handle my assignment.

Go write your little article.

Bye.

Ho, young lady.

Stach. Are you doing okay?

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

I was afraid

I was going to miss you.

I'm the mayor. It's a real honour.

Just jump on. Come on, jump on.

Stach comes to Ecumene

to stop the churches.

What is it I have to do? What do

they mean by stopping the church?

Churches. Plural.

We have four of them.

- Okay.

- Look, right on time.

You just can't stop them.

Tying them up won't work either.

Can you control

all four churches from here?

If only I could.

The churches move on their own.

No, I can only keep

an eye on them here.

I make the timetable.

They'd like to head to the centre

all at once, but there's no space.

I'm like a harbour master,

only with churches instead of ships.

Sounds like an important task.

- Now who's in charge here?

- Turn right. Turn right. Turn around.

If there was a place to park, we'd all

get a nice spot just outside the town.

Why not here?

Right on the town square?

These people aren't easy. If they come

too close, they're not so nice anymore.

- Do they never come together?

- Only if they have to.

Sorry, Stach, I had to make a call.

Mayoral duties.

- Hallo, Daddy.

- Hello, Jar.

Is it a fun game?

'When will you be home?'

Honey?

You're already here.

Why didn't you say so?

- Honey, this is Stach. He just arrived.

- Hello. Please don't mind the mess.

If I'd known you were coming,

we'd have tidied up a bit, right?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes