Kopps Page #6

- What's your name?

- My name is Gunnar.

I'm Hkan... Yes, I know,

I understand. I really do know.

But there is another side to it as well.

You're the leader of a SWAT team -

- you fill your vest,

not only literally...

...you are talented...

You know,

I think something's missing here.

A hug is missing.

Take is easy,

we're coming outthe house!

I repeat, we're coming outthe house!

We are now out of the house!

Stand by, everyone... Stand by.

Hi, Benny...

Hi, Benny...

Sh*t, cool vests.

Hi, we're colleagues, it's fine...

Okay, to the cars. Let's go, let's go...

F*** it, f***ing special force pricks!

I should have had my fishing rod,

and I should have had vodka, too...

Now it's gone to hell... sh*t...

I should have had one vodka.

Then the fishing rod,

tell him I haven't got it yet!

- Help me shift gear.

- My hand! Take it easy, it hurts!

Fourth gear!

Sh*t, you see that? F***ing cool!

-Watch out!

- What you doing?!

- It's a car chase.

- Car chase? No one's chasing us!

- I'm going forthe right!

- Where'd you get your licence?

- I'm Benny the cop.

What the f*** you doing?!

Take it easy!

Take it easy!

- What's up with your hair?

- Nothing.

- Nothing? You're f***ing...

- Stop it!

- Have you got a wig?

- What? No way.

- Damnit, Jacob, don't tell anyone.

- No.

Don't tell anyone.

No one will like me...

-Yes...

- No. I don't know any thing...

I don't want to be a policeman

anymore. I can't do it, I'm useless.

Can't f***ing

even drive a car properly.

I'm just a f***ing bald,

miserable wimp...

Come on, everyone likes you. It's

just not the time to discuss it now.

Look at you!

Take you hair and let's go.

- Where's my hair?

- There.

Don't say anything. Wait a bit...

Just f***ing forget it.

Benny, I have to.

Jacob, wait a bit. Jacob...

- Jacob, wait a bit.

- What the hell?

Damn... It feels like

I got some sh*t with my belly.

- I have to sh*t.

- You crazy?

Wait, I have to. I can't help it.

We're being chased

and you want to sh*t?! You nuts?

Wait. If I don't do it now,

I'll sh*t on us both while running.

- F***!

- I have to!

Sh*t, then!

- Where're the keys?

- In the car.

F***, in the car...

Help a little, damnit!

Lift me up.

- Anything happening?

- It's so f***ing quiet.

- Can't you sing?

- Cut it out. Never!

Come on, sing. Please.

... your eyes... on mine...

- And the moon...

- God in heaven...

Okay, into the forest everyone.

Move, move!

Calmly and carefully!

-You got any paper?

-You nuts?

- Can I use your bandage?

- Use your hair instead.

Whatever. Here... come on!

Stretch a little. F***, I can't reach.

You're on the cheek... I want the arse.

Sh*t, f***ing ant...

Police! Don't move!

I don't really know what to say...

The station will be closed,

as you already know.

I can't do anything

about that decision.

I've concluded my report

on the events in this town.

Can I ask...

- Is everything included in...

- Yes, everything has been noted.

- Our names...?

- You've already asked.

Will we be put away forthis?

That's what we'll do with that...

I wish you all the best with everything

you do, whatever it is.

Goodbye.

We just tried to boost statistics.

- Nice of you.

- Pleasure, no problem.

There's still some Kiwi cake

in the kitchen if anyone wants it.

Good, Dick, give them hell!

Christ, come on...!

Look at it positively,

we have each other. Huh?

- Benny?

- What? I don't know...

Agneta?

- Lasse, come on!

- What?

Well...

I have an idea. It may sound stupid,

but I've been thinking it over.

It's good, it's actually damn good.

I think we should...

- No...!

- That's damn good!

THREE MONTHS LATER

Pizza Police.

They're on their way.

Five minutes, ten at the most.

- Only 60, they had no change.

- There are a lot today...

- You have to knead it well...

- You can! Even my dad knows this!

These four have to go,

to someone called Pyk Jonsson.

- What's the address?

- Hang on.

I've got a Die Hard, a Scarface

and three Rambo with extra cheese.

- It's on the way.

- Loads of Rambos today. Incredible.

- Lasse, lay off the cheese!

- Just checking it's fresh.

- Gran, dough!

- More dough!

- ...and a Scarface.

- This American Psycho...?

- Does anyone ever order it?

- Hardly ever.

- Is it the name or is it...?

- Hi...

Hi.

- What are you doing here?

- I was just passing by.

I work for the health authorities now

and I'm here to close this pizzeria.

- Tragic!

- Very...

- I'm kidding.

- Oh...

- You want a pizza?

- I don't dare.

I know exactly which one you want.

I'll give you a Jacob Special.

Okay...

- With extra cheese.

- Okay, I'll give it a try.

Bye.

Benny, wake up damnit!

Translation:
Alexander Keiller

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