Kraftidioten Page #2

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Someone is after my people

and my territories.

And it is not hard to guess who.

- The f***ing Albanians.

- Serbs.

We shared Oslo with them, right?

We shared southern Norway, city by city.

They even got

the fatty oil pigs in Stavanger.

They were allowed

to use the airfield

so they could land their sh*t.

In peaceful coexistence.

- I have been incredibly nice.

- Too nice.

And this is the thanks.

This is how they thank me.

The land with drug several times a week.

Go up there. Get one of them.

Get me one of them.

- Do you know what he looks like?

- No, but don't you think we'll know?

Why the hell do we get all that snow?

I don't know how we stand it.

- It's snowing all the time.

- It's the welfare.

There isn't any hot country

that has welfare.

When the weather is great

you do not need a welfare state.

Then you gather a banana

and is done with it.

- What's happening?

- It's the snow.

In Bali, Thailand, Vietnam

people has to fend for themselves.

Spain is on the ass.

Portugal is on the ass.

Greece is on the ass. Italy is

on the ass. It is hot countries.

Hospitals have no personnel.

The families must come with food.

South America is a hole. Africa is a

hole. California soon go bankrupt.

Sun or welfare.

I think I have got something in the eye.

- In the eye or on the eye?

- In the eye.

Yes.

- So you better see a doctor.

- No, it's nothing serious.

I see him.

It is night vision that fail.

- Shall I drive?

- No.

I can drive.

Well, we won't get much more out of him.

Do not say a damn thing.

We have been at it all night.

Well but then

Then there isn't so much

to talk about.

Now they must learn

that they can not do as they please.

BUMPER-TO-BUMPER DRIVING.

WAIT FOR SNOWPLOW.

- Long time No see.

- Yes.

What do you want?

Someone killed Ingvar.

Killed?

Someone told somebody

to kill him.

Why do you come here

to say that?

You are his uncle.

I have never asked you for anything.

You can sit on this.

- Turn off now.

- Two minutes.

- Give me the remote.

- What are you doing? Do not be silly.

- Is it a sexy foreplay for you?

- Sexy

Why are you so annoying?

Stop it!

Go out and make coffee!

Rumor has it that Ingvar and Finn

has stolen a bag from the Count.

Count? Do you know him?

I once worked

for his father. Bullit.

His son Count

took over the business.

He was f***ing great.

He and the Serbs share the market.

- I will kill him.

- You will?

You could never kill anyone.

I have killed a Jappe,

a Ronaldo and a Strike.

I rolled them into chicken wire

and threw them in the waterfalls.

Then the little fish can get in

and gnaw the flesh from the bones

so they do not swell.

Then they just are there.

But the Count is not just

a f***ing Ronaldo or Jappe.

He's a dangerous bastard.

You can not neck him.

Thank you.

What is he doing here? I told you to

keep away from the criminal types.

- This is my brother! My little brother.

- Brother, no

She's just a little worried that you

are one of the old boys.

I have promised her

to to behave myself.

I will at least try.

- Forget it, Nils.

- A father must surely avenge his son!

Have you become Dirty Harry, or what?

Drop that bullshit.

Nils!

Wait a minute.

Do not be so damn childish!

You're damn right as annoying

as mother.

If you say something bad about mother

I'll knock your teeth in.

Okay.

The Counts name is Ole Forsby.

But if you must kill him

you must get an assassin.

How do I find one?

There is one who calls himself the Chinese.

I think he is still active.

What's with these names?

The Chinese, The Count,

Dirty Harry, Bullit, Jappe.

It is an old gangster thing.

What is your name?

Wingman.

- Wingman?

- Yeah, you know like in Top Gun.

The movie

"You Can be my wingman."

How do I find the Chinese?

Have you got the money? Do not worry,

she can't understand a word. Have you?

Yes, 90,000.

Okay.

You book a hotel room for him.

But only give him half

before he does the job.

He has a fear of flying and taking the

train. You pick him up at the station.

Not in your own car,

then he sees the license plate.

Take a taxi, give him the address. Take

home and wait, and then check on the web.

Once you know that he is dead, you send

the rest of the money to the hotel.

Is there anything

you are unsure about?

Why is he called the Chinese?

It must be cold here

for a Chinese.

No. Half now

and then half when I

I don't know your name.

I don't know your house.

I don't know if you send the rest

when the job is done.

As a biologist, I am optimistic.

Much is pointing in the right direction.

We have become more humane

towards each other and towards animals.

The default behavior 100 years ago

we now perceive as barbaric.

We kill each other

in increasingly smaller extent.

We have got our sushi.

Here you go.

Well, well. Getting lots of people.

Exotic today, how cozy.

Yes?

Then we'll see

if I will buy. Rune?

We need to hold a small meeting here.

Why don't you go and take a carrot?

Okay.

Cold.

It's called "to make me cold."

- Cold? Okay.

- Is the the Albanian Papa?

- We have a little trouble with him for the time.

- Papa is Serb.

- No, it's not Papa.

- Who is it?

Okay, you want to sell me the name of him

that want me cool. I get it.

How much?

Fine. You are a business man.

Understood.

I know very well

that the Chinese is Asia's Jews.

- So you buy?

- I'm buying.

Deposit the money here. When I see it

has gone into accounts in the Cayman

I'll tell you the name

on your enemy.

It's called "account". Non accounts.

Singular.

Fine.

- Dickman.

- Dickman, Dickman.

My dad had a damn

Dickman on the payroll.

What was his name?

Wing... Lord? Wing King? Wing... Geir?

- Wingman.

- Yes, Wingman, dammit!

- Good, old Wingman wants me dead.

- So I say thank you and go.

Hey, I just

a little moral question for you.

Now you are in Norway.

This is not a banana republic.

Here in Norway

we keep our agreements.

I kept my word.

You give money, I give enemy.

That agreement you have held.

But now I think of the other one.

You made a deal

- with a paying Norwegian citizen

about making me cold.

And that agreement

you have not met.

Ugh.

Will you please leave the carpet?

Really good maki roll.

- Doesn't it smell like firecrackers?

- No, isn't it more like Chinese food?

Fried, right?

- Soya in roll.

- Kung Fu tomaki.

Imagine if someone discovers us?

No one discovers us if we

are cautious.

Hey, it will be OK.

I've lit them all.

- How did it go?

- It went well.

- I did basically as you said.

- Basically?

I gave him all the money. He can't

rely on someone he doesn't know.

- There are perfect snow conditions right now.

- Damn it!

I just thought it would be good

for you to go skiing.

Do you know what

Dickman means in Norwegian?

"Pikmand".

It hell does.

FLOUR-KING PARTY WITH THE CELEBS:

THRIVES AS SINGLE!

Hello, Wingman.

Do you have time for

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