Lars And The Real Girl

I'm inviting you to breakfast.

I can't, I have to go to the church.

Well, after the church then?

C'mon, we haven't seen

you for so long.

Take this, I don't want

your little baby to get sick.

It's so cold out.

- C'mon.

- OK.

You'll come?

Oh yeah.

Great.

- Could you put that whole thing on...?

- Oh yeah.

- You owe me 5 dollars.

- Oh oh...

Until I sit at the table,

I don't owe you anything.

Something is going on with him.

I am worried.

You keep saying that, I think you're...

I think the other things may be kicking in.

In all the world...

there are books and books and books of Lords.

But in all this world there

really is only one Lord.

We need never ask:

'Lord, what should I do'?

Because the Lord has told us

what to do.

Love one another.

That my friends, is the one true Lord.

Love is God in action.

The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ,

The love of God...

The fellowship of the Holy Spirit

be with you for now and for evermore.

Amen.

- This is when you want some help.

- Oh, thank you, dear.

It's my turn to drop them off at the hospital.

You know... you're a good looking fellow, Lars.

Where's your girlfriend?

I don't have one.

- Are you gay?

- No.

My grandson is gay,

I know all about the gays.

I know, but I am not gay, so...

Well... don't leave it too long,

it's not good for you.

Here.

Give this to somebody nice, for a start.

Hello, Lars.

- I guess I'll see you at work tomorrow.

- Yeah, okay, fine.

Karin, remember, he is 27 years old.

Maybe he wants to be left alone.

- That's not what he wants.

- Oh, really?

- How do you know that, exactly?

- Because...

that's not how people are.

Ah, there he goes.

Lars, c'mon, you promised.

- Is that normal?

- Five dollars.

- Good morning.

- Good morning, Cindy.

Did you have a nice weekend?

That new girl is kinda cute, huh?

You and Margo? What do you think?

Lars, you gotta see this.

I am not in the mood for porn this morning.

It's not porn.

Okay... it is, but check it out, alright?

You like?

Man it's solid. Like if she'd weigh 125 pounds,

then she weighs 125 pounds.

You can customize everything,

they got all different heads and parts.

You can design your own woman.

- And Lars, Lars.

- Yeah.

They're anatomically correct.

Not gonna buy one, aren't ya?

I wish...

Look how much they cost.

Wiped out for a new Xbox.

Morning.

- Morning.

- Oh hey, yeah, good morning.

Margo is here, everybody. Hooray.

Could you put the...?

Yeah, I was thinking. We're the only ones

from the lake, we could car-pool.

Lars, it's your day for coffee, buddy.

Oh yeah.

You know what your problem is, Margo?

You're just too aggressive.

Just... chill-lax, ya know.

Shut up.

Wait, stop. Stop!

Karin, what? What?

We want you to come for dinner.

Will you come?

- You scared me.

- Sorry.

Sweetheart, sorry.

Wait.

- I can't... I can't.

- Why not? No.

Why not?

Lars, we miss you.

I brought my work home,

so I have to... I'll get in trouble.

No, you didn't.

Yeah? Did you hear that?

That's my phone, I think.

Come on, wait.

Lars, stop. Stop!

- Come on, please?

- I... I have other plans...

and I can't.

There is salmon, and cherry pie in there.

- Would you please let me go?

- No.

Okay.

- Is that all you can eat?

- Yeah, that was delicious. Thank you.

No no, you stay there.

It's my turn.

You boys talk.

Okay. Karin's been worried about you.

She thinks you got a problem...

because you spend so much time by yourself.

- I'm fine.

- That's what I told her.

It's exactly what I said.

Dad was kinda like that too, so...

Yeah, but he didn't want anyone around him.

So that's a difference.

That's not true.

Okay, you know, yeah sure,

maybe after Mom died, but...

You didn't know them before that, so...

I mean nothing you could have.

I'm just saying...

Karin and I would really like it

if you moved in.

- No, that's okay, thank you.

- The house is half yours.

Yeah, I know. But I'm fine, thanks.

Just putting that there.

- Good night. Sleep tight.

- Good night.

Oh wait. Here are some leftovers for you.

Do you have my blanket?

- Oh yeah, it's on...

- I'll get, I'll get it. Grab these.

Be right back.

It's a beautiful blanket.

- Gus says your mother made it for you.

- Yeah.

When she was pregnant.

Well she must've loved you very much,

like we do.

- Are you mad at me?

- Is he coming?

Here we go.

- Good night.

- Thanks. Good night.

What?

We talked. He's fine.

Six weeks later...

- Hello?

- Hey, Lars. Karin.

They just delivered a huge box for you.

It's in the garage.

- Oh... Okay, thanks.

- Okay, bye.

Thanks.

That's a nice sweater.

Hey.

Come on in.

That's okay. Can Karin

come to the door?

- Karin.

- Yeah?

Honey, come here, it's Lars.

- Oh... Really?

- Yup.

She is just... doing that several kinda...

It's pregnant women's yoga.

That's good good stuff.

- Hey.

- Hi.

What's up?

I have a visitor.

You have a...?

- Yeah.

- A visitor?

That... it's great.

Yeah.

- And she's not from here.

- She?

Wow. What do you... what do you..

what do you know... did... where...?

Where did you meet this person?

- On the Internet.

- Yeah, everybody's doing that now.

That's great.

She doesn't speak much English though.

It's okay. It's the same...

It's really the same with the guys at work.

It's... not that big a deal.

Okay.

Yeah, well, ya know, she is in a wheelchair,

so I just don't want you to feel weird about it.

- No, no.

- We don't care.

And I have to ask you really,

I know it's a really big favor.

Yeah?

She's just really religious,

and because we're both young

and single, it just doesn't feel right for

us to stay in the garage...

- Oh no, no... We'll put her in the pink room.

- No, she can sleep here.

- In the pink room?

- Yeah... sure.

And there are new towels.

Just give us half an hour, you know,

pick up... and get something in the oven,

- Okey dokey.

- ... get the place ready.

Yes.

- Okay, let's get us get started.

- Right.

That is...

You quiet ones...

You know what they say about the...

It's great.

- See you in a little bit.

- Okay.

Bianca is a missionary.

Or was a missionary. Right, sorry.

Because she was raised by nuns.

But now she is on a sabbatical

so she can experience the world.

Isn't that neat?

She's shy.

Well, you are.

Everything is so new...

for her, right?

- Are you hungry?

- We are starving.

Gus, will you give me a hand

in the kitchen?

That was that.

I know.

- He is crazy, right? He's crazy, Karin.

- Shhh.

- What are we gonna do?

- I don't know.

My God... Karin.

We got to put him in a hospital, I think.

Can't just put him in a hospital.

I can't afford that.

I can't believe this.

My little brother is totally, totally insane.

Put yourself together.

Gus, shh, calm down. Calm down, okay?

He's talking to a doll, baby.

We just gonna get through this somehow okay?

- I just don't know how am I gonna do that.

- I don't either,

but you're gonna be calm, okay?

Okay.

- I am sorry.

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