Late Phases Page #4

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- I got it.

I'm blind. I'm not crippled.

So some of the neighbors thought the shuttle

might be a little cumbersome for you.

So I was happy to volunteer.

Lucky me. How long have you been

at Saint Anthony's?

About twenty-five years now.

You must know the priest pretty well?

I suppose you could say that.

- Not as well as he knows me though.

- Oh, yeah?

Yeah, I owe my undying soul to that man.

Seems a little strange to me.

Father Roger is the least strange

person I know. Myself included.

I can tell you he's been quite concerned

with you this past week.

Oh, yeah? That's reassuring.

You don't seem like a very

religious man, Mr. McKinley.

I'm not. Just because you wear

a collar don't mean much.

A man can get away with a lot

in uniform. Believe me.

It's just... I don't know.

I was just... it was funny

when you called, because it...

You know, I went to high school with

your mother and you look just like her.

- Isn't that amazing.

- It's really incredible.

Hey, Father!

Well, I've got to talk to this guy.

I'll talk to you again.

- Okay, thank you.

- Yeah. Stay in touch.

I owed you one.

That's kind of you.

I was very glad to see you

came back in this week.

And, you know, it looked to me

like you were paying attention.

When you're blind, it always

looks like you're paying attention.

Yeah, well, what the hell were you

thinking about so intently for an hour?

How you became a priest.

It's funny how people don't ask that...

question much anymore.

I don't know, I was a bad kid and I...

was mean and greedy

and stole and hurt a lot people.

Then... I don't know, one day, you...

you have to pick college or trade or...

- The Army.

- Yeah.

And I decided to go into the seminary.

Go for the full transformation.

It's sort of life and death, really.

So you killed that bad part of yourself.

Killed it? No.

You can't kill that thing.

I guess I caged it and starved it and...

and whittled it down to...

a half pack a day.

When I went to 'Nam,

I honestly thought

I was going to save lives.

Yeah, but you ended up taking them.

My last tour, '68, Dien Phu Valley...

The gooks,

they strapped a grenade to a kid,

maybe six years old.

And they sent him at us.

Nobody would take the shot.

I did.

Is that what happened

to the "good side" of you?

I might be blind, but when I close

my eyes I still see that kid's face.

That moment was like a transformation.

God don't want nothing

to do with me, Father.

And I don't want nothing to do with him.

Excuse me, Mr. McKinley,

we better get going.

Talking about this felt good, didn't it?

If you want to talk to me, Father,

you know where I live.

So what did you and Father talk about?

Not much. I don't think he is

who I thought he was.

You ever see him act violent?

What are you saying?

I mean, he's a human being. He's just

another monkey like right of us. Come on.

Look, you can disrespect the community,

you can disrespect our neighbors,

you can disrespect me. I don't care.

Do not disrespect that man. Do not...

We're here.

Yeah. Here we are.

I wish I had that goddamn ammo.

- Yeah?

- Hey.

Is this the right address for the cross?

You're late. Is it heavy?

Yeah, it's f***ing heavy. You want it inside

or you want it somewhere else?

Bring it around back.

Jesus.

What's the rest of your day

look like, Chief?

I dunno.

You mind giving a old man

a ride into town?

Afternoon.

O'Brien sent me. You Westmark?

If I'm not then he should be grateful

that I'm paying all his bills.

Come on in.

Watch your step here,

it's a little uneven.

What can I do for ya?

Do me a favor. I don't need no wisecracks,

no questions. You good with that?

Hell, yeah, I'm good with that.

What do you need?

Berreta's? M16's?

Uzi. You're an Uzi guy.

Come in here. Come in my office.

Watch your step right here. There it is.

What can I do for ya?

Can you make silver bullets?

Yeah. I can make silver bullets.

What guns?

Smith and Wesson 64 revolver,

Remington 700 BDL rifle.

- Yeah, I can make those.

- Can you do silver shotgun shells?

Shotgun shells? Well...

Shotgun shells

are a little more complicated.

- They take like an hour to make.

- I only need one. I'll take it.

Hey.

What do silver bullets

make you think of?

Me? The Lone Ranger.

You ever see that?

Vigilante, fighting for

justice and all that.

He used silver bullets,

something about how the precious metal

stood for the preciousness of life.

The only thing precious

about life is that it ends.

I heard that, brother!

Anybody else ever come in here?

Asking for these?

Only guy I can remember,

come in about a year ago.

Do you mind if I ask who?

Nah.

I got to look.

My memory is not what it used to be.

Let me see here...

Oh, yeah! Here it is. His name was...

Thanks.

Take care.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for everything.

Dad! Dad! Dad! Jesus Christ!

It's Will! Put the f***ing gun down!

What the f*** are you doing here?

I came here to check up on you, man.

You almost shot me, Dad!

What has gotten into you?

What have you done to this place?

What are you doing with this house?

Why are you sitting in the closet with a gun?

It's a system.

It's your system?

This house, I mean,

it's a complete mess.

You've only been living here

for a month, Dad.

Tomorrow will be a month.

What do you want, Will?

Anne's pregnant, Dad.

Good.

Look, I came here to tell you that...

She wants to have the baby

closer to her family.

So we're moving, pops.

I'm happy for you, Will.

Are you?

What do you want from me?

Hugs and kisses? Go live your life.

You know what...

You know what I want from you?

How about the truth?

You know what that is?

I think you know exactly what that is.

I found that when I was

cleaning up your house.

Now you told me you threw that

in my mother's casket when she died.

Why?

Why'd you tell me that?

Why did you lie to your son?

It's got nothing to do with you, Will.

No. No, that's a lie too.

It's got everything to do with me.

You know what, Dad.

If you ever need anything from me,

don't come calling 'cause

I'm going to go live my own life.

Will...

Richard? Richard? Wake up!

- What?

- I think there's someone inside.

Oh! Richard...

Mr. Griffin?

Mr. Griffin...

- Should I call the police?

- No! No, no.

- Are you alright?

- Clarissa, Richard...

What are you doing here?

James? Do you know where you are?

Will you kneel with me? Will you

pray with me? Just for a moment.

Hey, look. What is this?

It's the middle of night!

Richard...

Yes. Yes, James, we will pray.

We will pray.

Lord,

make me an instrument of Your peace.

Where there is hatred,

let me sow love.

Where there is injury,

pardon.

Where there is doubt, faith,

and where there is despair, hope.

Where there is darkness, light.

And where there is sadness, joy.

Lord...

Lord let me seek not to be consoled

but to console.

Let me seek not to be understood

but to understand.

Let me seek not be loved

but to love.

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