Legally Blonde Page #9

---

She smiles, as the group leader nods, waiting.

ELL E (CONT'D)

(continuing)

Oh!

(dramatically)

Two weeks ago, I saw Cameron Diaz at Fred

Segal -- and talked her out of buying a

truly heinous angora sweater! Whoever

said that orange is the new pink is

seriously disturbed.

She looks around, pleased. Enid' snickers as the rest of the

group stares at Elle, dumbfounded.

38 INT. ELLE'S DORM ROOM - DAY 38

A grey, dingy, cell-block style room -- now crammed with

Elle's clothes, the pink fluffy love seat and potted palm,

along with an Elliptical Cross-Trainer, pink flamingo party

lights and a neon pink margarita glass sculpture.

Elle tries to shove a large law textbook into her tiny Prada

backpack to no avail. She gives up and tosses the book onto

the bed where Underdog leaps away to miss being squished.

ELLE:

Wish me luck, Underdog. It's my first

class as a serious law student.

She kisses him and looks down at her completely inappropriate

skimpy Gucci outfit, which she accents by putting on trendy,

wire-rimmed glasses.

(CONTINUED)

29.

38 38

ELLE (CONT'D)

(continuing; to herself)

I totally look the part!

39 INT. LAW SCHOOL HALLWAY - DAY 39

Elle heads for a classroom, amidst a crowd of students who

eye her like she's an alien. She rounds a corner, seeing --

WARNER, in all his handsome glory, looking over his schedule.

She starts toward him, as if pulled by a magnetic force.

Arrogant Aaron sees her passing by.

ARROGANT AARON:

(seductively)

H l o t e e. . . . . . .

el hr.

Elle keeps going, not even noticing him. Eyes only for

Warner. Arrogant Aaron stomps away, pissed at the perceived

blow-off.

As Elle gets closer to Warner, she opts for wandering past

him, seemingly oblivious to his presence.

WARNER:

(stunned)

Elle?!

Elle turns, ultra-nonchalant.

ELLE:

Warner?! Oh my God, I completely forgot

you were going here!

He looks at her, confused. People walk by, staring.

WARNER:

What're you talking about? You're not

here to see me?

ELLE:

No, silly. I go here.

WARNER:

(still confused)

You go where?

ELLE:

Harvard. Law school.

(CONTINUED)

30.

39 39

WARNER:

v- y

-- Y ou g o t in to Ha rv a rd L aw ?

E LL E.

(con fuse d at his confusion)

W h at , like it's that.hard?

W a rn e r stares at her :-- completely discombobulated. She

s m i l es sweetly and makes a show of checking her watch.

. ELLE (CONT'D)

(continuing)

Oops! Time for class. Meet me after?

On the benches?

WARNER:

Uh -- sure.

She sashays off with a confident smile.

40 INT. CIVIL PROCEDURES CLASS - DAY 4.0.

Students file in and take their seats. Elle enters, looking

around nervously at the imposing auditorium. Arrogant Aaron,

next to her, leans over.

ARROGANT AARON:

If you're looking for the best seat, I

hear the front row is the place to be.

Elle smiles at him.

ELLE ·

Thanks.

41 INT. CIVIL PROCEDURES CLASS - DAY - LATER 41

PROFESSOR ELSPETH STROMWELL, a tough-as-nails Grande Dame in

her 50' s , addresses the class. Laptops abound -- except for

Elle, who has a fuzzy pink notebook and a pen with a pink

plastic heart on the end.

PROFESSOR STROMWELL

A legal education means you will learn to

speak in a new language. You will be

taught to achieve insight into the world

around you, and to sharply question what

you know.

Everyone soaks this up. Including Elle.

(C ONT IN UED )

31.

41 41

PROFESSOR STROMWELL (CONT'D)

(continuing)

The seat you've picked is yours for the

next nine months of your life. Enjoy it.

And those of you in the front row,

beware. . ..

El le , in the front row, between two UNSHOWERED BRANIACS, ·

looks around, panicked. One of the braniacs passes her the

seating chart and she has no choice but to sign her name.

In the back, Arrogant Aaron nudges his friend and smiles.

PROFESSOR STROMWELL (CONT'D)

(continuing)

"The law is reason free from passion."

Does anyone know who spoke those immortal

words?

Dorky David raises his hand.

PROFESSOR STROMWELL (CONT'D)

(continuing)

Yes?

DORKY DAVID:

(confidently)

Aristotle.

Professor Stromwell approaches him the way Cruella de Ville

approaches a puppy.

PROFESSOR STROMWELL

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