Leprechaun 3

One video camera...

Beta!

(clanging)

Good evening, my friend.

Welcome.

So nice to see you.

I need money to buy gas,

so I can get out of this place.

Yes, of course.

You will be showing me

what is in the sack?

I can give you a hand.

May I?

Let's just open up here...

Oh, my, my, my!

What is this horrible thing?

It's a good luck charm.

Yes, I can see

it's working very well.

Whatever you do,

don't touch the medallion.

No, I won't.

I am giving you...

- Ten...

- No!

Twenty dollars.

Goodbye.

Come back soon!

Oh, my!

A face only a mother could love.

(crackling)

What a piece of junk!

"Don't touch,"

he says.

Because it might break,

it's so cheap.

Oh, Gupta, by golly!

You're a bloody genius!

You're making

a wonderful deal for $20.

Ahh!

I like Indian food!

So spicy!

- Who are you?

- I'm a leprechaun, me lad,

and you're a greedy thief.

For trying to steal me gold,

I'll be giving you some grief.

Ouch! Ouch!

Have a lie-down, lad?

Nice leather!

I appreciate

a good pair of shoes.

Oh, don't mind if I do!

(screaming)

I think I'll whack you in the head

a dozen times until you're dead.

Take it away!

Take it away!

- You're very afraid of this?

- Stay away, I'm warning you.

I'll tear your eyes out

and I'll rip your face off.

You're a bloody devilish

creature!

You wanted me gold,

and you suffer the consequences.

Now I'll take what's mine,

and be gone from here.

No! You and your gold

belong to Gupta.

(screeching)

Well, you missed us both.

You wanna back up

and try that again?

Sorry.

It's all right,

happens all the time.

Do you know

anything about cars?

'Cause this one

doesn't work.

- Name's Scott.

- Tammy.

Tammy. Great.

What seems

to be the problem?

Obviously, I don't know.

It just... died on me.

Well,

let's take a look.

Ah, see,

someone stole your engine.

Start it up for me,

if you can.

(sputtering and clanking)

So what do you think?

Have you ever

blown a rod before?

I beg your pardon?

The engine, I meant.

See, you got your pistons,

and your rods, and...

You don't wanna

know this, right?

No, actually I don't.

I'll give you 10 bucks

if you give me a ride to work.

Forget it.

You don't have to pay me.

Where do you work?

Chicago.

Huh, yeah, got me.

Chicago.

That's very good.

I would have taken you there, too.

Where is it?

Oh, here it is.

"Legends and Folklore."

Computer:
G'day to ya.

The name's O'Reilly,

and I'm here to tell you

about leprechauns.

Legend has it that they were once

magical elves in ancient times...

who became obsessed

with riches and gold.

I'm one shilling short!

Wow! Look at all the lights!

It's unbelievable!

Yeah, it's a quaint little place.

- So where do you work?

- "The Lucky Shamrock."

Oh. What's that?

It's a casino, Scott.

What do you do there?

- I'm a magician.

- Right on!

Actually, right now,

I'm just a magician's assistant,

but one of these days,

I'm gonna have my own act.

I believe you.

One-little, two-little,

three little leprechauns...

four-little, five...

...little, six...

little leprechauns.

This place is unknown,

no one lives here.

Me own savings and loan.

I'll have nothing to fear.

Computer:
Remember,

his power lies in his gold,

and he'll use all his magic

to protect it.

Yes, try to protect it

from this.

So is this your first trip

to Vegas?

Yeah. I'm just passing through.

I'm on my way to L.A.

Oh. You gonna be

a movie star?

No, actually,

I'm on my way to school.

My first year of college.

Great!

It's a smart move.

Go to school.

Learn something worthwhile.

I just thought I'd swing through

Vegas, see what it's like.

Take my advice

and don't stay long.

Yeah?

Vegas has a way of

latching on to a person.

You wanna go,

but you can't.

I'll remember that.

Computer:
Potatoes are

a leprechaun's favorite meal.

Like all good ol' Irishmen,

he loves his spuds,

but he'll take a bite out of anybody

who threatens to steal his gold.

Woe betide the man who covets

a leprechaun's shillings.

He'll batter and brain them,

he'll mangle...

My, my, my!

Now let us go find

your little brothers and sisters.

In fact,

let us find the entire family.

Computer:
If a mortal gets hold

of the leprechaun's gold,

he'll be given one wish for

every shilling in his possession.

He can have anything

he wants in the whole world.

(rattling)

Thanks for the ride.

I really appreciate it.

- Sure.

- Bye.

Hey, I've never been inside

a real casino.

Oh, forget it.

You gotta be 21.

I know, but I thought

you could sneak me in,

so I can see

what it's like inside.

What do you think,

this is like Disneyland?

I could lose

my job for that.

My boss

could lose his license.

And you

will lose your shirt.

Right. I didn't think about that.

I'm sorry.

All right, look.

If I get you into the den of iniquity,

you gotta promise me something.

No gambling.

- Okay.

- Just take a look around,

see what you gotta see,

and beat it.

- I'm out of there.

- All right.

So who do you work for,

magician-wise?

Right now, I'm assisting

The Great Fazio.

- What's a Fazio?

- Well, Scott,

a Fazio is a mediocre magician

who couldn't pull a rabbit

out of a pet store.

But it pays the bills.

Remember now,

no trouble, okay?

In and out.

Okay.

Maybe I could come

see your show,

and we could have dinner

afterwards.

It's a possibility,

if I'm not busy...

who knows?

In you go.

You are mine,

you little bugger.

Ahhh!

Ha, ha, ha!

You missed me!

You missed me!

If you're gonna linger,

I'll give you the finger.

Ahh!

Ahhh!

Stay away from me,

you steaming pile of cannibal dung!

I'm a dangerous man!

Stay away from me!

Computer:
I remember when

Paddy McGinty got sick with...

I want me shilling!

Man:
Oh, yes, yes!

Man:
All right.

Oh!

Thank you, Marissa.

You're terrible.

Seven!

- Whoo!

- All right!

Roll again, Father Bob!

Give me those dice here.

More money, come on.

Ready?

Here she goes.

Look at this!

All right.

What time is it?

It's after 7:
00.

Where's Tammy?

I don't know, damn it!

She's got work to do!

Why do you keep her around?

She's not worth a damn.

She's got a way

of filling out a costume.

I could look

just as good, you know.

Why don't you hire me?

or should I say 20 lbs. Ago?

I'm not always gonna look

just like this, pally.

No? You found

the fountain of youth?

I've been saving my pennies,

buddy boy,

and one of these days,

I'll come waltzing in that door...

with everything packed

into all the right places.

You need more

than a boob job, Loretta.

You need

a personality transplant.

B*tch!

Oh, I'm sorry

I'm late, Fazio.

I told you, you will

address me as "Great One."

Off stage and on.

You're a magician,

not the Pope.

I am your teacher.

You will show me respect.

Right.

Loretta.

Mm-hmm.

Throw me that lighter.

Ow!

Are you doing

the magic rings tonight?

Screw the magic rings!

Oh, my God!

I've got something

You're in the box,

I do the standard switch gag,

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