Life of Crime

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So you done heard it now.

So, what do you think?

What I don't see,

I don't see a schedule of events.

It's a little loose.

But see, what we are right now is it

be flexible. You see what I mean?

And it can go down any time

once the old man is gone.

And now that we know

that he's going away

and she gonna be

there all alone,

that might be too good to wait.

The guy's pulling about 50K

a month out of Detroit.

Not declaring it, not paying

taxes, any of that sh*t.

Okay, why isn't that enough?

Hold that over his head.

He pays you or you go to

the Federal Building.

Because I know he's doing it,

but I can't prove it.

I tell you, the man ain't dumb.

It ain't like he got his name

on no papers or nothing.

We take this man's wife...

Okay, he's so

scared that he gotta pay.

And it ain't like he can

stall us out and tell us,

"It's gonna take me a couple of

weeks to get the money together."

Not if he wanna

see his wife again.

Hey, listen, Louis,

you done heard all about it.

You with it or not?

Guy come out behind me?

No.

Wait.

Yeah, you mean this big

dude with the Borsalino?

Um, yeah.

I'm in the can, comes up, says,

"Hey, loan me some money."

I say, "Loan you some money?

You want a buck for a drink, what?"

He pulls a knife, says he wants to

borrow whatever I got in my wallet.

Mother took $27.

Talk some sh*t to him.

Try to get him out in

the middle of the street.

Nah, I don't think it'd work.

Try it.

If it don't, then keep running.

Hey, you!

The f*** you want?

You wanna take another $30 leak?

What?

How about you quit hiding behind a knife

and a bunch of women,

you fat tub of sh*t and come out here?

What the... That's right.

Get your ass up. Come on!

Damn!

Dropped this. Yeah.

How much this cost him?

Couple hundred.

I hope he learned something,

but I doubt it.

Eighteenth hole.

The guy's standing over

his tee shot for what

seems like an eternity.

Finally his partner says,

"What is taking you so long?

"Hit the damn ball!"

The guys says, "Well, my wife is up

there watching from the clubhouse,

"and I wanna make

this a perfect shot."

His partner says,

"Give me a break!"

"There ain't a snowball's

chance in hell

"you're gonna

hit her from here!"

Hi.

Hi! Hi.

How you doing, Marshall?

I'm great.

Mr. and Mrs. Frank Dawson.

Tally-ho, everyone.

What happened,

they couldn't find a bigger trophy?

I'm gonna have to buy a

bigger house to put it in.

Have you met Mickey, my wife?

No. Hi, Mickey.

Ray Shelby. Nice to meet you.

She's the other

trophy in my life.

Hello, Mickey. Hi.

Frank.

Hey, Frank.

I'll drive. I'd really like to.

You know what's funny?

After 15 years, I still

have to explain to you

this is work,

winning this thing.

Frank...

You make remarks like it's a piece of sh*t.

I never said that!

Frank. Watch the road!

This here is like the Statue of

Liberty with a golfer on top!

Please watch the road.

I did not say that.

An innocent little voice,

"Cute little Mickey Dawson."

"Oh, my, isn't she precious.

Such a skinny little thing."

"I wonder, how does

she keep her figure?"

What she does is she watches

her husband like a hawk!

Pecking at him... Careful! Stop!

Counting his drinks.

Just leave the car out here, please.

Gets so wrapped in it,

she burns calories.

Okay, slow down! It's fine.

I got this.

What the hell!

Why did you park in the

middle of the driveway?

I'm never driving

drunk with you again!

And now you're saying I'm drunk!

This here, your Kentucky rifle.

Black powder musket, flintlock.

Winchester Mercury, 12 gauge,

double barrel, short.

Blow a hole in you the size

of a basketball close in.

M1 Garand, Army, World War II.

That's beautiful.

German standard issue.

M1 carbine, standard issue.

US Army, World War II.

Lot of people

think this is a Luger.

This is not. It's a Walther P38.

Your dad was in the war, right?

Yeah, tank gunner.

Yeah, but...

Which side was he on?

So, Richard, you're telling me all

these herbs come from your own garden?

Yeah, from the fall.

They're dried now.

Um, really good.

You went and pee in this, did you?

I just f***ing with you.

I know you ain't peed.

I could tell if you did, though.

What? What's the matter?

Oh, that. That ain't...

It's actually my favorite.

But, you know, Richard don't think...

Some niggas is all right,

ain't they? Right?

Some.

You like that Diahann Carroll,

don't you?

Don't get cute for company.

You talk about her all the time.

But the rest of them,

and I tend to agree with him on this one,

he said they need

to go back to Africa.

The ones on welfare.

Right. Of course

the ones on welfare.

You know, they ain't doing sh*t.

They ain't

contributing to society.

He said I could stay, though.

At least until we finish the job, you know.

We should get going.

Yeah, you don't...

You don't want nothing?

You don't want me

to follow her today?

No.

No, no. No, that's fine.

We're good today.

We'll get in touch

with you, Richard.

He's incredible. He's amazing.

Listen, all I got to

do was tell him,

"Hey, Richard,

this a rich, big Jew."

And then it's like,

"This is for the cause."

Then he would do it even if he

didn't need the money so bad.

What's he need money for?

Buy more guns? Hitler's underwear?

No. His old lady left him.

Ran off, took Richard

Junior and everything.

No kidding. Yeah.

Now he think that

they in California

'cause he got a

postcard from Disneyland.

Jesus.

He so dumb, it's adorable.

- That's her?

- That's her.

Hmm.

I was expecting someone older.

Oh, that's her.

That's the one we want.

That's Mickey.

Why'd they have to choose

us for this stupid article?

Because you won that day.

It's mostly about you.

"Children's games

become their career."

"Proud mother

Margaret 'Mickey' Dawson

"watches her son

Bo smash a volley."

Bo, why don't we

focus on today's game?

You didn't wake me up.

I didn't know you were playing today.

You didn't say anything.

I never play tennis on Sundays, huh?

Well...

Why would I play tennis on Sundays?

I'm just...

Hey, Bo, what do

I do every Sunday?

Tennis. Play tennis.

Okay.

Why do I have to wake up

to that neighbor's dog?

How many times have we told him?

"Keep it locked up."

Hey, Frank, your

name's in the paper.

For the Club Championship?

No, it's actually

about the kids.

You know, the

kids playing tennis?

Oh, oh, look at that!

It's the two of you there.

Yeah.

That's a nice picture of Bo.

You look stressed, honey.

Listen, since I'm, uh, going down

to Freeport the end of the week...

I told you about that, right?

I don't know. You might have.

Yeah, I'm sure I did.

Group of investors coming

all the way from Japan.

Can you believe it?

So, I figured,

why not fly down to South Beach.

Tonight.

With Bo? See your folks.

Get him settled,

then I'll hop on the shuttle to Freeport.

What do you think, Bo?

Sound like fun?

I just don't see why

all of a sudden he has to go.

How many times?

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