Like Mike Page #3

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not to play.

Man.

But... I saw the tape

of that halftime show

you put on.

You got some game.

I am honored

to have you on my team.

Thanks, coach.

You bet.

Whoo.!

Whoo.!

Geoff:
We've got a bigger

than usual crowd tonight,

and a lot of it is curiosity.

The Knights have a brand new player.

He's 4-foot, 8-inch Calvin Cambridge,

joining us straight from the playground

of the Chesterfield group home.

Reggie, your reaction.

Geoff, this is unprecedented.

I can't imagine what the Knights players

are thinking. We'll see what happens.

We're gonna fiind out shortly.

Both clubs are taking the court

as we get ready

for tonight's opening tip.

Go Knights!

What was that?!

Admiral! Admiral!

The admiral just waved at me.

He just waved at me.

Admiral!

Hey...

Come on! Hey! Hey!

Geoff:
Coach Wagner of the Knights

has seen enough.

He wants and gets a time-out.

Let's go. Let's go.

Good hustle, baby.

What?

Come on, guys.

It's not funny.

Now, offense, is there any play

that's gonna work for us tonight?

I have an idea.

Oh, man.

I've been watching,

and they're vulnerable

from the weak side,

especially to a pick set

away from the hoop.

Why don't we run

the give-and-give-and-go?

You mean

the give-and-go?

No, see,

they'll be expecting that.

Have Tracy feed the ball

to Henderson.

Henderson's gonna

feed the ball to Joad.

Joad's gonna pass it

back to Tracy.

As Henderson sets the pick,

Tracy's gonna take the shot.

I like it.

Oh, no. No.

I'm not gonna run some play

by some snotty-nosed kid, man.

Damn straight, coach.

Fine. Henderson, you're out.

Tracy, you take Henderson's slot.

Calvin, you take the shot.

What?

Have you lost your mind?

- You said I could play anybody I want.

- Yeah, well, I didn't mean him.

Am I the coach or not?

You are. For now.

Can you believe it, Reggie?

It looks like

the kid's gonna play.

A rousing welcome

for the man they came to see,

the little fella,

Calvin Cambridge,

into the game for the Knights.

Calvin! Run the play!

What's he doin'?

- Run the play.

- No.

Would you just run the play?

Time out! White!

Why'd you call time out?

Uh... I gotta pee.

He's gotta pee.

Announcer:

Calvin Cambridge is calling for

a bathroom break?

I guess when you gotta go,

Reggie, you gotta go.

Yes!

The crowd is roaring.

That can mean just one thing.

That little guy,

Calvin Cambridge,

has taken care of business

in the locker room

and is back on the court.

He's done.

Ladies and gentlemen,

this kid's for real.

He can play some basketball.

## Tied up, tied up ##

## You got me so ##

## You got me so ##

Slam dunk over David Robinson!

Unbelievable!

the Knights trail by 2.

Trying to find some way

to actually come back

and win this thing.

It's good! The Knights win!

Am I a genius or what? Huh?

Tell me I'm a genius!

Announcer:

This is the NBA on NBC.

The big story in the NBA:

Calvin Cambridge,

the 4-foot-8 dynamo,

has now signed

a lucrative contract

with the Knights.

And no wonder,

after he led them

to a come-from-behind win

over the Spurs with 27 points?

That kid was unbelievable.

Did I just see

the admiral saluting him

at the end of the game?

You know, Cambridge's

contract makes him

the youngest,

and the shortest person

ever to sign a deal

with the NBA.

He's lean, he's mean, he's 13.

Yeah, now all the kids

are gonna be saying,

"I wanna be like Calvin".

Well, I guarantee you one thing,

this orphan

will not be an orphan for long.

I can't believe you're going on the road

with the Knights.

Can I fit in your suitcase?

Hey, what about me?

Bittleman.

Hey, Calvin, this is great.

Well, uh, I'm proud of you.

Listen, uh, when you're on the road,

uh, people might want to adopt you.

But you should realize it's, uh,

only because you're a celebrity now,

and, uh, they're just after your money.

Besides, your contract forbids it.

Wait a minute. Forbids it?

Oh, yeah.

Didn't I tell you?

Uh, I signed your contract

as your guardian,

so, um, as long as

you're playing for the Knights,

that can't change.

Hey, coach, check this out!

Pretty good.

Welcome to

Self-Hypnosis for the Fearful Flier.

During today's peaceful flight,

you'll transport

yourself into a state...

Tracy.

What?

Relax. Flight's fine.

Just came by to say hello.

OK, my bad. I'm sorry.

You are familiar

with the NBA mentoring program,

are you not?

Oh, no. No. No. No.

You don't even know

what I'm gonna ask.

No, I do know

what you're gonna ask,

and it's not gonna happen.

You're trying to punish me.

No.

The kid's rooming with you.

I think it would be good

for both of you.

We're goin' down!

Whoa. Whoa.

No. No. No.

There is no way in the world

I'm gonna be roomin' with that kid.

I'm callin' my agent.

You know why?

'Cause it ain't gonna happen.

This gonna be so cool

roomin' together.

Uh, my boy Murph

says I snore.

I think he has to be

trippin' sometimes.

Maybe we could

rent NBA Street.

Or if you don't like that,

we could play Monopoly.

Or if you don't like Monopoly,

then we could just sit around and rap,

because I love to talk.

Oh, yeah, I noticed.

Have fun, Tracy.

All right, look.

Coach says I gotta room with you,

so let me set down the rules

right now.

First of all,

I ain't your boy, OK?

I'm not gonna be playin'

Monopoly with you,

Game Cube, Rubik's Cube...

Anything with a cube,

I ain't playin'.

Third, you know, I'm not gonna

be tuckin' you in at night,

and I'm defiinitely

not gonna read you

the Three Little Bears,

you got that?

Whoa! Look at this!

Do we always

stay in places this fancy?

Mm-hmm.

OK.

All right, I'm goin' out.

Oh, um, w-would you

like some company?

No. No,

I wouldn't like company.

Well, what do I do?

Uh, well, um...

oh, call room service,

get some food.

But what's room service?

Right. Right. OK.

Here's what you do.

You pick up this phone, right?

Mm-hmm.

And you dial "6".

Tell them what you want

and they'll bring it

to the room... for free.

For free?

For free.

You got it. Eat up.

No, you gotta be

messin' with me, right?

No, I'm not.

Try it yourself.

For free.

Hello?

Uh, yes.

Um, is this room service?

Yes, it is.

And will you really

bring me up

some food for free?

Well, sure.

Anything you like, sir.

You will?

OK, um, in that case,

I'll have a pepperoni pizza,

french fries, and cake,

ice cream, and lobster tails.

Lots of lobster, lots of seafood.

Chicken fingers, french fries...

Ah, man.

Um, you know what?

Let me...

I just want to clean up

just a little, OK?

Well, that's OK.

No. No. No. I just

want to clean up this...

Hey, you're so beautiful,

I have to clean up for you.

No, it's all right.

OK, so I'll be right back.

Calvin, I need you...

Calvin, what are you doing?

What are you making such a mess for?

You were right about room service.

OK, Calvin. Calvin.

Know what?

I need you to get lost.

OK? I don't care where you go,

just get lost.

Joad wants to play NBA Street.

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