Loitering with Intent

Ooh yeah

Oh sh*t. Hey man, I gotta get to

Brooklyn, I gotta get to work,

open the bar, I gotta work on

this audition for the morning.

What're you going in on?

Now is this scene before or

after you saw your own leg off?

I've seen slaves breaking their

backs in the fields. Have you?

Pardon me, pardon me, I'm very sorry. No, we

should head out. We gotta be there at four.

That's enough, from both of you.

And you... wait. That's enough.

We need you up there, kid.

I'll be right up.

Brother, prepping an audition or doing an

audition, or resting from an audition.

You can never commit,

because you never know,

you might get a job,

but you never do get a job.

Sorry, but you don't.

Okay, who needs what?

These three here,

we need two Ripostos one Fellini.

I don't know what he wants, and that

freak down there, I'm not certain.

Oh sh*t, is that Raphael?

I was a gay on the Woody Allen movie you did.

I'm gonna be right with you. Just kidding.

I knew you had a small part

but you were great.

Thought you were

gonna be huge!

What happened?

When I headed for that door I realized

if I went out, I would never come back.

I didn't want to never come back

but I couldn't come back out

onto the stage, so

there wasn't anything left

so I went up the ladder.

You're The King.

The King. You're Joe Strummer.

- I'm Joe Strummer.

- You're a sonic producer.

I'm a sonic producer!

I think I liked it. If you don't mind

I wanna sit for the second scene.

Sure, no.

What you did, really good.

Really good.

Very good, thanks.

I don't know what else to tell you.

You're in an age void.

Would you like a Peroni?

I want you to change your attitude, chief.

I want you to ask me again,

and this time, with a smile.

Go f*** yourself!

Get the f*** out!

Yeah, we will get the f*** out of here!

Look at me, look at me.

Dude I can't do this anymore.

I'm gonna f***ing kill someone.

- In an age void.

- What?

They don't know what to do with me.

That's the problem.

Look, it's Lincoln Center.

It's a cultural superstore.

It's white boy business, I mean, you

getting that part is a long shot, come on!

Well what's the point then, Raph?

Please, tell me,

I mean it's the same five directors,

the same 10 writers, the same 20 actors,

they just do everything! It's not good

for theaters, it's f***ing boring.

Look, it's a tight circle,

we're not part of it.

You know the days of Joe Papp, off the

street, the living theater, that's done!

Who's off the street?

I'm trained, well trained.

- I know you're trained.

- I went to conservatory!

Yeah but you didn't go to Juilliard, and

that's what this is all about, right?

What big shows you were in,

who saw you do it,

my dad is Edward Albee,

all that kind of stuff.

- Edward Albee doesn't have kids.

- I know.

- He's gay.

- Doesn't mean he doesn't have kids.

- But he doesn't.

- Hey, Dom! Who's this, your pimp?

Hey, how you doing, what a sight!

You look fantastic. Look who

it is, Kaplan!

Hey don't mind us.

We were running a scene right now...

I can't believe I'm running into you maniacs,

you guys have been on my mind all week!

- Was it in a naughty way?

- Take it easy.

It's always a little naughty

with you, Raphael.

Tell us the less naughty parts for now.

All right. That was an amazing

night at your bar last month.

We've had so many amazing nights

at the bar with you, Kaplan.

No, we were talking movies with

your writer friend, Jonathan.

- You had those leather pants on!

- We love those pants.

Wasn't Jonathan talking about doing some low

budget Raymond Chandler detective story thing?

- No.

- That was our idea.

Who was mentioning the Sweet Smell of Success?

- "Match me, Sidney"

- Match me.

I love that movie.

What's Jonathan up to?

I love his show.

Can you get me in touch? I promised my

boss I'd find something interesting

for him to produce for under 300 grand,

he's looking to shuffle some money

around on a tax credit thing.

I don't know what Jonathan' up

to, but we wrote that script.

- It's written, it's done.

- What script?

The Raymond Chandler thing.

We're burning down the

cultural superstar rasta.

Wow, look at you guys, that's great.

Did you write parts for yourselves?

- Of course.

- Yeah, we're the leads. We play brothers.

Okay, well what's it about?

Don't be shy, Dominic.

Tell Kaplan what it's about.

It's, uh, well, basically, um...

- Well, we play brothers.

- Yeah, I got that.

And, you know, we own a detective agency.

- And it's a noir.

- Absolutely.

Uh, you know, basically...

Well, it's an elevated genre film. At least

that's how aunt Carrie described it.

- Aunt Carrie read it?

- Yeah, she loved it.

How the hell did you get

aunt Carrie to read it?

- No offense.

- None taken.

- We know some people.

- Yeah, we're tapped in.

Well, what'd she say?

She said, what did she say, Raph?

- Said it was raw.

- Yeah, oh yeah.

She said it was really raw and original,

and that she'd love to get her hands on it.

It's called "The Blackmailers Don't Shoot."

- Or maybe "The Black Mask."

- Yeah, I like that one.

What the f***, is it low budget? You guys

think you can make it for under 300 k?

- Oh, yeah.

- Super low. Really low.

- Less than that.

- This sounds perfect.

My boss is looking for something new.

I get to produce this project.

Show me the script, let's do this.

No wait, hold on a minute, you know...

We're doing rewrites,

we're swamped, you know, we can't.

This money goes away in two weeks, we don't

have to jump through any hoops with them.

- I just need to see the script.

- I'm gonna be honest with you.

Look I get you guys, I always have.

I can give you ten days, that's it. But we're

meeting with other writers, so get it to me.

How you gonna get out of this.

We don't even know aunt Carrie.

I auditioned for her once.

- You can't write a script in ten days.

- Yes, but we can.

We, together.

Come on, we've been

talking about doing this for years.

I have an idea.

What do writers do?

They go to the country.

We'll go to the country. To my sister's house.

We'll have it all to ourselves.

Peace, quiet, no distractions...

Let's just get there, get down, and do it.

Photosynthesis baby.

Oh, I forgot how

peaceful it is in the country.

Nature will flip you, Dominic.

Flip you for real, remember that.

Yeah!

Police activity,

people. stay back.

- Dominic, grab the bags.

- Oh, yeah.

That's very cute.

Very cute.

To Gigi's country manor.

Starting tomorrow,

I think we should cleanse it out.

No booze.

I saw this documentary on Ingmar Bergman

- at the Film Forum.

- I love the Film Forum.

He said the demons want you to

stay in bed with cold feet.

So the first thing he does is he gets up

in the morning and he takes a walk.

And then he writes.

You want some gross character of a woman!

That means power makes you more masculine,

and masculine means you're ugly.

Well shame on you, you macho shithead!

All right, f*** this.

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