LOL Page #4

Honey, I just don't know.

I can't seem to hold my drinks like I used to.

And what about this?

I wasn't smoking. I don't smoke. Mom!

If I ever catch you with this again,

I am shipping you off to your dad's! Got it?

That would be a dream, huh, Mom?

And don't worry,

I'll see you there in the morning.

Your Paris trip is off. And you're gonna

come back and clean this mess!

"L can't believe I screwed things up this bad.

"Why can't I rewind in real life?

What a mess!"

Lloyd, get your lazy ass over here

so we can rehearse, man. Call me back.

He's not even picking up.

So, how was the party?

It was okay.

Do anything fun?

Well, you know, the grandma was there.

Why is Lola vacuuming, Mom?

Ask her.

Anne.

What do you want?

Would love for us to stop fighting

over nothing.

Nothing? You call sleeping

with random sluts nothing?

- Anne. ..

- I can't... I can't do this.

You know what? You are the best thing

in my life and you are also the worst.

- Anne, I swear, I never slept with any...

- Stop swearing.

And more importantly,

will you stop lying to me? All of you.

I think we just need to stick

to being what we're meant to be.

Which is?

Parents to our kids.

- I got to go.

- Anne, please don't...

This is gonna be good.

Wow. Your sister is hot. Hi, I'm Chad.

She's not my sister.

Actually, I'm her step-mother.

And she's my wife, pal.

Settle down, please. Quiet, please.

Quiet!

Welcome, parents and students.

Hello.

- Oh, my gosh. He's so cute.

- Check him out.

We have a detective

from the Narcotics Division

of the Chicago Police Department.

He's here to talk to you today.

So, please,

give him your undivided attention.

He's got my attention.

What?

Settle... Please, please, be quiet.

I'm sure you all have something better to do

than sit here and listen to some guy

who thinks he's cool and educational.

Yeah!

I hear you, I hear you.

But there's some facts

I need to arm you with.

I have a picture

that shows the detrimental effects

of long-term drug abuse. Take a look.

Now that I have your attention,

I want to show you

the real effects of THC on the brain.

THC is the agent in pot that causes

the high in so-called "soft" drugs.

You look at this image, it's pretty clear

it's not so soft anymore, is it?

Symptoms of cannabis

can range from paranoia to panic attacks,

to symptoms of schizophrenia.

- That was a very good talk.

- I know.

- I hope some of that sticks into your head.

- Okay.

Why are you running?

Because there's someone

that I'd like to avoid.

- There's Janice. I got to go.

- No, no.

- We need to get... We need to get going.

- Hey.

- How you doing?

- Hey, how are you?

Good. How is the heel?

The heel is fine.

Once is coincidence.

Twice, I'm going to have to call that fate.

Is that what you call it?

- Does she know him?

- Oh, God, I hope not.

I think he's going to handcuff your mom

to your bed.

Shut up, shut up. Don't say that.

- Are you coming tonight?

- I'll try, but I'm grounded.

- Your artwork?

- Hey, look, look, look.

- She's up to no good. I told you.

- Really?

She's disgusting. I don't get it.

You know, that was so great, to the...

The talk in there. I...

I'm gonna buy you a drink.

L.-

It wasn't a question.

I'm telling you I'm gonna buy you a drink.

Mom. Can I go to Janice's house?

Just to do homework.

Lola, this is...

- James.

- Hey.

- My daughter, Lola.

- Mom, can I go?

No, you have to do your homework at home.

- This isn't fair.

- What was that?

Nothing. Love you, Mom.

I'll see you at home.

Charming.

You ready for a drink?

- I thought it wasn't a question.

- It's not.

- Okay. This... All right.

- Yeah.

- Have you seen Kyle?

- Yeah, he's in the bathroom.

Hey...

So how was it?

- It was awesome.

- You're disgusting.

- Was it good?

- What do you mean?

Come on, don't lie to me. Just own up to it.

Hey, Lol. What's going on?

What did you tell her?

Nothing. It's not my fault

your little groupie can't take a joke.

Hey, Lol, wait up! Hey, Lol, stop. Please.

I need to go.

- I knew that. Come here.

- Okay, Wen. Stop it. Okay?

- What are you doing?

- What just happened never happened.

Got it?

- You're funny.

- No, I'm serious, okay?

Take this. Wait five minutes. I'm not kidding.

I'm not kidding. Wait.

What happened? What did I do?

Get in!

- Hey, Lol, wait up!

- Leave me alone.

What did Ashley say to you?

What did she say to you?

- Kyle, don't play dumb.

- No, seriously.

What's wrong? Come on.

- Don't act like you don't know.

- Hey, Lol, what's your deal?

My deal is that everybody knows

she does guys in the bathroom, Kyle.

Wait. What? You think Ashley and I...

In the bathroom?

Well, at least you can get it on

with someone.

Congratulations.

Wow! I guess we're done.

Lola?

Lola? Sweetie, what is it? What's wrong?

Nothing.

Come on, have something to eat.

It's good to eat when you're sad.

What would you like?

What would taste good?

Nothing right now.

You're not going to turn anorexic now,

are you?

Not from skipping one meal.

No, I saw something on TV.

It goes pretty fast.

- It's not what it is.

- I know.

Nobody's worth your tears, baby.

I'm gonna get you some soup.

Okay. I love you.

No, I saw him.

He was in there with the Post-it.

When?

After that drug assembly thing.

Okay, are you absolutely positive

that it was them?

Yes. Yes. I saw that stupid bag. No offense.

No, it's fine.

Hey, girl! High-five it. Girl, I'll see you...

Here they are.

Sh*t.

"What's wrong with me?

"Do I have a sign on my head

that says 'Cheat on me'?

"I mean, no surprise from Ashley, but Kyle?

"And since bad things come in threes..."

You know what this report smells like?

What?

No more music. Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas to you, too.

The most important thing

is that you're pretty.

You'll get a rich husband.

Great.

Last year, you were on the honor roll.

Mom, it's only one B.

That's exactly my point.

A B in math, a C in history, a D in biology?

Lola, what are you thinking?

I'm not thinking anything, Mom.

Because I don't care

about the population of China

or the division of cells.

The only thing I care about,

the only thing that hurts,

is Kyle and the Post-it.

And howl want to hurt them

as much as they hurt me.

So, who's the guy

we're supposed to make jealous?

The emo one next to the slut.

Nice hair. What a dork.

Come on, he's not that bad.

Shut up and make it look sexy.

Okay.

- Like only you can.

- Yeah, it's true.

- No. I'm not talking...

- Who needs a girl?

- Come on.

- Hey, who is that guy?

- Who's that guy?

- Jeremy. He's cool. Why?

Nothing.

I mean, who drives a stupid red Vespa

in the middle of winter?

- Why do you care?

- Yeah, why do you care?

I don't care. Come on, let's go.

She de-friended me?

Thank you.

So, how's Jeremy?

How's Ashley?

You know I'm not seeing Ashley.

- Can we talk?

- Okay.

No, in private. At your house at 7:00?

Okay.

Okay.

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