Looney Tunes: Back in Action

Be very quiet. I'm hunting rabbits.

I am a duck bent on self-preservationum.

Say your prayers, rabbit.

It's rabbit season.

- Duck season.

- Rabbit season!

Duck season! Fire!

Hold everything.

"Daffy gets blasted."

Page 7:
"Daffy gets blasted."

Page 8:
"Daffy gets blasted again!"

What's the matter with you people?

We can't do this kind of stuff anymore.

Brothers Warner...

show biz legends like me

shouldn't have to play stooge...

to that long-eared,

carrot-chomping, overbite-challenged--

What's up, doc?

Bobby, how's the wife?

Great nose job, Chuck. Thanks, girls.

Good rug, Mel. Never would have guessed.

- Pardon me.

- The pleasure is mine.

Fellas, I think Daff's right.

Maybe I'll take a vacation.

Go visit my 542 nieces and nephews.

Mr. Duck, excuse me, I'm sorry.

I don't see how we can have

a Bugs Bunny movie without Bugs Bunny.

Oh, my heavens, no.

You couldn't have a movie

without Bugs Bunny.

If you don't mind me asking, whose

glorified personal assistant are you?

Kate Houghton, Vice President, Comedy

Kate did Lethal Weapon Babies.

Finally, a Lethal Weapon

that I can take my grandchildren to.

Gentlemen, check your phones.

Our latest research shows

that Bugs Bunny is a core asset...

that appeals to male and female,

young and old throughout the universe...

while your fan base

is limited to angry fat guys in basements.

Yeah, but... Come on, fellas,

I'm thrice the entertainer the rabbit is!

Fine, it's hilarious...

but moviegoers these days

demand action heroes, like me!

Top that, rabbit.

So, it has come to this, has it?

I'm afraid

the Brothers Warner must choose...

between a handsome matinee idol...

or this miscreant perpetrator

of low burlesque.

Whichever one's not the duck.

That's the stuff from my office.

- You don't have an office.

- Not anymore.

Symbolically, this is bad.

Please, brother. Other brother?

Icy she-wolf? Help me, please.

I'm too moist and tender to retire.

- Let me escort you out.

- Wait!

I haven't tried toadying, kowtowing,

or butt-kissing yet.

I'm still begging here!

Freeze!

Can I try that again?

No, thank you. We'll call you.

Hey, D.J. How did your tryout go?

Well, let's see.

I can say I made an impression.

Your father can get you a job

anytime he wants to.

I know, but I don't want that.

I'd really rather earn it, sir.

- Mr. Warner mentioned you this morning.

- He did? What did he say?

He said don't forget the TurtleWax.

What about animation?

I could do cartoons.

Dead duck walking.

- Morning, Mr. Bunny.

- Very hot now.

And I do voices. Listen.

- Excuse me.

- "Fetch the stick, boy."

"What a maroon."

"You can't handle the truth."

Some grip, lady.

I need you to eject this duck.

- Lady, this is Daffy Duck.

- Exactly.

- Not anymore. We own the name.

- Yeah?

You can't stop me from calling myself...

- What do you know?

- You fired Daffy Duck?

No, I didn't. I did. They did.

You just were following orders.

You know what? You don't know me.

You're Kate Houghton,

you're the VP of Comedy. Go figure.

You drive a red 1988 Alfa Romeo.

Good engine. Little under-driven.

I know this

because you nearly ran me over last week.

Anyway, about that duck,

you want me to get rid of him still?

- Duck, yes. Eject the duck, please.

- I can't do that.

- Why not?

- He's gone.

What are you waiting for, backup?

Shabby job so far, constable.

Quick! After me!

Now you're gonna pay for that one.

Come here!

- Dress Inspector!

- Look out!

One side, Spartacuses.

- Come on.

- Daffy, stop!

Cut him off at the pass, boys.

All units in pursuit of little black duck.

Well, that's just cheating.

Don't follow me.

That's not right. Cut!

That's lunch, everybody!

- That airbag cost a lot of money.

- I'm okay.

Good morning. Batman, you good?

All right.

My chariot awaits.

Yes!

Bat-lights. Bat-conditioning. Bat-stereo.

To the Duck Cave.

Now what are you doing?

Stay away from that Batmobile!

- I'm allowed to steal. I'm a celebrity.

- Tell it to the judge!

- Feeling pretty good about yourself?

- I am.

- You bested that dastardly duck?

- I did.

You're gonna offer your catch

to the pretty executive?

Indeed.

Miss Houghton!

Get out of the way!

Look out!

What do you know? I found Nemo.

I think she likes you.

Your father would be so ashamed of you.

But I was... It was...

At first, they told me to lose the stutter.

Now they tell me I'm not funny.

It's a pain in the butt

being politically correct.

You're telling me.

What kind of performance

do you call that?

You made me sound

like a total space cadet, man.

I'm sorry you feel that way.

I was trying to be real to your character.

If you, like, goof on me in the sequel,

I'm coming after you.

And I'll give you a Scooby Snack!

There are some areas of the script

I think we need to address.

There's no heart, no cooperation,

nobody learns anything.

Daffy learns not to stick his head

in a jet engine.

- He's gone.

- No, Daffy always comes back.

I just tell him how much I need him.

We hug, we cry,

I drop something heavy on him, I laugh.

The duck is history, okay?

So the question is...

how can I help you

reposition your brand identity?

Answer:
We team you up

with a hot female co-star.

Usually...

I play the female love interest.

About the cross-dressing thing?

In the past, funny. Today, disturbing.

Lady, if you don't find a rabbit

with lipstick amusing...

you and I have

nothing to say to each other.

Look, I'm trying to be nice...

but I was brought in

to leverage your synergy...

and I am not going to let you

or some wacky duck--

Daffy.

Wacky, daffy, nutty, fruitcake,

crispy over rice, it doesn't matter.

Well, these matter.

And this.

And they say we get Daffy back.

Right, boys?

- We want Daffy!

- Bring him back!

We love Daffy!

Little Damian.

Hey, Granny.

Hi, Tweety.

How was work today?

Eventful.

What a nice young man.

Guess who? So did you miss me?

I'm glad I was fired.

In a few days,

they'll be kissing my befeathered rump...

begging me to come back. But I won't.

Did I miss the part where I invited you in?

I'll be too busy accepting numerous,

multiple offers.

Every studio in town...

Who am I kidding? My career is over.

Perhaps I was being too polite. Get out!

I'll starve. I'll have to eat envelope glue.

Wait, a sushi bar.

No!

- Daffy.

- Yes.

Leave my father's house. Now.

You live with Daddy?

Yeah, so?

Just, you know, kind of temporarily.

I've hit rock bottom.

I'm hanging out with a security guard

who lives with his father.

My grease and gravy!

Your dad is Damian Drake.

- The super spy.

- He's an actor who plays a spy.

- And that? That was his I Spy Award.

- Ingenious.

An actor playing a super spy as a cover

for being a super spy playing an actor.

In fact, I'll bet this whole dump

is a super spy lair.

Nothing is as it seems.

You're probably protected by

an invisible force field right this minute.

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