Love Fiction Page #2

Toodles.

- What is it?

- This is hilarious!

What's wrong?

No response from her?

Wait. She must have a reason.

I guess.

Must be some unavoidable reason.

Like a very strict, disapproving father.

Or her fiance in the States

took her away to New York.

She could be stuck in the hospital

and crying cuz she can't call me.

All I can do is just wait.

But waiting is torture.

Just think God is testing your love.

Think of Werther's painful nights

after writing letters to Lotte.

Though his love for Lotte was painful.

That's why werther's waiting is so revered.

She is a noble being who can

give such pain to you.

Then, in order to prove my love

and ease her of pain,

should I just end my life

by shooting myself?

You should stop reading books.

Okay.

Try fishing instead.

- Fishing?

- That's right.

It's great for mental health.

Think of women as fish.

Sh*t.

If the fish doesn't touch the bait.

Then, you move to another point.

Meet other women!

Joo-wol! Call for you.

Who is it?

I'm Joo-wol's older brother.

He's sick.

Who's calling?

Says it's LEE Heejin.

I wondered what time it was

in New York and answered.

Hello?

Hello, Mr. KHOO.

Did I call too late?

I have a horrible memory.

I moved departments and found

your letter while cleaning.

If I didn't, I would've called when I quit.

I was dying here, and she's joking!

I'm hungry.

Wanna get something?

Sure. What do you like?

I enjoyed reading your novel.

Which one?

Is there another book besides

'Memoirs from the Basement'?

That's the only one officially published.

So, what are you working on these days?

It's called 'Femme Fatale',

but I can't get it started.

Like 'Femme Fatale' by Brian De Palma?

I've been planning to read

Brian's book, but I haven't yet.

It's a movie.

Oh, right.

Why aren't you eating?

Don't you like pork?

I'm happy just watching you eat.

- Have some.

- Okay.

- It's good.

- Okay.

Thanks.

That's tiny.

Right.

You can't eat meat?

Actually, yes.

- Why didn't you tell me?

- I'm sorry.

But your wrap tastes good.

You can eat meat wraps?

Cuz the meat is covered with vegetables.

It's okay if you don't see the meat?

Then, I feel less repulsed to it.

Appearances must be important

to you in judging people then.

I think appearances are important

in judging people.

What clothes they like.

What color.

Running shoes or heels.

Horn-rimmed or

rimless glasses.

Straight posture when walking

or a splay-footed walk.

Doesn't that say a lot about a person?

It's true. I'm a firm believer

of appearances.

I started thinking like this

from high school.

Our class motto was

'Look good in form.'

That was our homeroom teacher's theory.

Form's important.

No matter what sport, learn the form

then you'll master the sport.

It was his simple theory in sports.

I could copy Denis Bergkamp's

shoot and turn pretty well.

I got chosen on our class team

for the school's soccer matchup.

But the kids in class 7

played like their ignorant drill teacher.

Forget form, they ran around

in clumps like in the army

and humiliated us doing

ballet on the field.

Yes!

With the humiliating

score of 8:
0

our teacher, the gym teacher,

was put to shame.

That's hilarious.

Wanna hear something even funnier?

Sure.

During summer vacation.

The teacher gave us homework.

What?

Circumcision.

- For homework?

- Yup.

He said, when a man sleeps with a woman,

it's embarrassing if it isn't tucked.

There's a guy who lived

in Europe till grade 9.

He kept saying his family

forbids circumcision.

Know that the teacher said?

Nip it.

Ah, I'm sorry.

That was stupid.

Guys like that kind of jokes, right?

Tell me about you.

I've been babbling on here.

About what? Ask me.

Well, about how you lived.

The most insulting thing

your mom ever said to you.

Ever prayed for the guy you had

a crush on to dump his girlfriend?

Do you take phone pics on an angle

or not. Stuff like that.

- You're curious?

- Yes.

I lived in Alaska till high school.

Alaska.

My dad runs a Korean restaurant

in Anchorage.

My mom died when I was young,

so no insults.

I went to an all girls middle

school, so no crush.

I majored in photography so

I don't take my pics.

Photography was your major?

Yes, but now I take pics as a hobby

in a club and stuff.

What kind of pictures?

Pictures of people.

Objects and scenery don't interest me.

Then, can you take my picture sometime?

Really?

If not being handsome is okay.

That makes it more interesting.

I see.

Mr. KHOO? Then, can you

pose for me?

Sure, I have a new book coming out.

I need a picture for that.

A good looking one.

I take pictures as is.

Of course.

It's time to go.

I've been with her for over 4 hours.

I cannot reckon her expression.

Does she like me or not?

Time is so cruel.

I have so much more to show her.

The only thing she learned about me

is that I'm vegetarian

and that I got circumcised in high school.

Another first impression utterly ruined!

- Oops.

- Heejin!

...Your place is very secluded.

I guess.

Aren't you scared to live here alone?

My husband chose it

to hear birds in the morning.

Wait. You have a husband?

Not now.

But still.

You were married?

Yes.

Oh.

Are you disappointed?

No, why should I be?

We parted a year ago.

I see.

Should I have mentioned it?

No, it's nothing big.

Right.

It's nothing to be ashamed of

or blurt about.

Right. Of course.

Marriage? It's good to

try it first.

Better to get it over with.

I'm sorry.

That's classic. It's perfect.

This is my friend, Dominique.

She's talking to me.

She's talking about Alaska

for over an hour.

But who cares?

The fact that she's looking at me

and talking

makes me the happiest

man on earth right now.

- In Alaska,

- Yes?

- When they greet.

- Yes?

They slap each other on the ear, right?

Slapping ears means they're really close.

Oh, really.

It means they're happy to see you.

The tribes have slightly

different greetings.

Some hold arms up.

Some rub noses.

Like the Maori in New Zealand.

How they rub noses to greet each other?

No, it's slightly different.

They put noses together.

When the man says Bu-ten-ni,

the woman says Eum-hmm.

Bu-te-gi-ni?

- Bu-ten-ni.

- Bu-ten-ni.

It's getting late.

Let's get to it.

The bathroom's over there.

You don't have to wash up.

I like it natural.

Okay.

- I'll get ready.

- Okay.

That way.

That's good.

Just be yourself.

You're hilarious. It's great.

- Am I doing this right?

- It's great!

Funny?

So, you didn't even get to hold her hand?

It happens.

What now?

What now?

Well, she's the one to ask.

I'm already her slave.

The only thing I want from her is

the most preposterous demand in the world,

for her to love me.

That's all.

Hey, KHOO.

Yes?

How about taking a breather

and writing something else?

Like what?

Our tabloid paper.

- Rumors and Truth?

- Yup.

I thought of running a serial story in it.

What do you think?

You're asking me to write a serial story?

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