Love Me Tonight Page #3

- Now we can go on, Pierre. Good old Pierre.

- We can go on if I ever fix this car.

Princess! Help! Help!

Help! Help!

She's fainted again.

You know, I had an elder brother

who used to faint quite often.

He was a nip-omaniac.

A what?

A nip-omaniac.

He used to go around pinching things.

Oh, I had a friend like that.

He used to pinch business girls in elevators.

They had to send him to a cooler climate...

- No... I knew a girl...

- This is no time for reminiscences. Get a couple of footmen to carry her upstairs.

But you gave the servants the afternoon off.

Our footmen are playing football against the Old Soldiers Home.

- You two carry her upstairs! Someone fetch a doctor!

- You carry her, I'll get the doctor.

Valentine, can you go for a doctor?

Certainly. Bring him right in.

No, no, it's for Jeanette.

She's fainted again.

Princess,

permit me to introduce Doctor Armand de Pertignac.

- Your Highness...

- Doctor.

And now my dear,

remove your dress.

- My what?

- Your dress.

There's no occasion for distress.

- Is that necessary?

- Very. Yes.

As long as professional ethics apply,

I'll see you with only a doctor's eye.

The doctor's eye is satisfied.

Now I'll hear your heart.

Don't sigh.

Very good. Nothing wrong here.

Now I'll take your pulse, dear.

Perfectly regular, right on the tick.

Madam, oh Madam, you cannot be sick.

Then why do I lie awake in bed?

- And why does blood rush to my head?

- At night?

Quite right, at night.

And why does music make me sad?

And why do love songs drive me mad?

- At night?

- Quite right, at night.

- And frequently I faint.

- That's quaint.

I feel so pressed

when I'm alone in bed at night...

- How old are you?

- I'm twenty-two.

While other people dance, I feel

so dead at night...

At twenty-two?

Well this won't do.

Are you married?

My husband died 3 years ago.

At 16 I was wed.

- You've been a widow for 3 years?

- 3 years the Prince is dead.

- Were you very happy with your spouse?

- He was a son of noble house.

It was a happiness of great peace.

[...]

My better half.

And here you have his photograph.

How was old your bridge-groom, dear?

- Seveny-two.

- Seventy-two?!

- Seventy-two.

- Well this won't do!

Sweet music makes me cry and pout.

Perhaps I better journey south.

Perhaps my tonsils should come out.

Well it's a very pretty mouth.

I'm wasting away,

for three years I've starved.

Alone, no joy I've tasted.

With eyes, and red lips,

and a figure like that.

You're not wasted away...

You're just wasted!

Well doctor,

we have planned an outing in the forest

but I suppose we better call it off.

No, no; go right ahead.

- Oh! Then Jeanette is not in any danger?

- Well, nothing immediate.

But! The Princess ought to be married.

- Married?

- Married?

To a man of her own age.

Ah, but the only two eligible men in France,

the only two of rank equal to Her Highness,

are not exactly of my niece's age.

How old are they?

One is 85. And the other will

be 12 on his next birthday.

- Well... This is a problem.

- What do you recommend?

Exercise!

Exercise and exercise!

Exercise...

This gives me new hope.

About my chances of marrying Jeanette.

I'll ask her to consider me as a prescription.

My dear Count...

The only obstacle lies in the delicate matter of rank.

Jeanette demands a prince at least.

And you are not a prince.

Well I would've been if our family

hadn't been badly gypped

during the crusades.

Anyway, Your Grace mustn't

forget the tenth Count de Sauvignac.

- Marie Antoinette?!

- Positively.

- Now may I ask Jeanette?

- Yes, but not this afternoon.

Quite right. Of course, that's me,

you know, always impetuous.

Monsieur...

Mademoiselle... I'm looking

for the Vicomte de Barres.

- I didn't know he was expecting a friend. Are you alone?

- Alone?

- I mean in life. You're not married?

- Ah, no!

I'll be right down!

Monsieur...

Who made that for you?

McClintock and Armstrong, Monsieur...

Of London.

Might I recommend them for your own service?

Oh no, thank you. I'm looking

for the Vicomte des Barres.

Possibly in the drawing room,

Monsieur.

- Mesdames...

- Monsieur...

- His smile is so disarming!

- So grand!

- So gay!

- So charming!

Mesdames...

We bore you with our sewing?

- Sewing?

- Quite so.

Oh no! A needle is magnetic!

- How true!

- And how poetic!

- Mesdames...

- Monsieur...

Oh no, no. Never use silk on armor.

Flannel is the thing.

- Are you interested in armor?

- Any kind of wearing apparel. Is this your only job?

- Oh no, I putter around.

Tell me, where can I find the Vicomte de Barres?

Oh, he's somewhere about... I hate him!

Imagine - he would like to tear down

this beautiful chateau!

No! It would be better to tear down the Vicomte.

Ah! You're a man after my own heart.

You have a soul.

Someone looking for me?

- Ah, Monsieur Vicomte.

- Maurice...

I came down about those...

My, my, how well you're looking!

You... you've met my uncle...

- Uncle?

- The... the... the Duke.

Oh yes, we had a little chat.

He's the first of your friends

who I didn't want to hit with a battle axe.

He recommended flannel.

Flannel?! Would you pardon us a moment, uncle?

Maurice, did you tell uncle about those bills?

But I didn't get a chance.

And I didn't know he was your uncle.

Now, Vicomte, I brought all your clothes

and I want the money.

See, it's 63,000 francs.

And I'm here also on behalf

of my fellow creditors.

Put yourself in their place.

I'd like to. It isn't anyone who can

be a creditor nowadays.

Now, Maurice, I'm going to be frank with you.

Right now I can't pay you.

Ah, then I'll have to see the Duke.

He'll throw you out. He hates tradesmen.

He'll throw me out too, so what's the use?

I won't leave the chateau without my money.

Oh why do you say...

I've got it! Then stay here.

I'll have the money in a few days, I'll borrow it.

No no no, this is no place for me.

A tailor in a chateau.

- Well why not?

- No no, I'm going to see the Duke.

Oh! The charming young man!

- I'm trying to persuade him to stay.

- I'm sorry, I can't.

Oh there you are.

We've been trying to persuade him to stay...

Of course! You're staying! Jeanette!

Countess, let me present...

Gilbert, present your friend.

Yes yes, of course.

This is my good friend...

Maurice... Baron Courtelain.

Yes, I've met the Baron.

- We're trying to persuade him to stay.

- Are we?

The Baron must've changed.

He used to make very sudden decisions.

I'll stay!

Ha ha! That Baron...!

How did it go...

Mimi... You funny little good for nothing, Mimi.

Mimi... You sunny little honey of a Mimi.

I may be high.

Mimi, you got me sad and dreamy.

You could free me

if you see me.

Mimi, you know I'd like to have a little sun.

Mimi, bye bye.

That Baron, eh?

Mimi... You funny little good for nothing, Mimi.

Am I the guy?

Mimi... You sunny little honey of a Mimi.

I may be high.

Mimi... You got me sad and dreamy

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